Engagement Ring Protocol after a breakup

I'd just sell it and take a trip. Enjoy yourself after the trouble.

I feel like engagement rings are conditional gifts (that's what me personally thinks. Not sure about if that's what it is legally by you). Your intended gave you the ring on the condition that you both would get married. Since he broke it off, you are no longer going to be married, so that condition can't be filled. You should give it back.

@Awkwardtobe - Traditionally the ring is only a gift if the Engagementwas made on a holiday (Christmas/valentines day/Thanksgiving/A birthday ETC) and if the Engagement occurred as that then the ring is technically considered a "gift" of that holiday

If it was not, then the ring is not considered a "gift" and should be returned to the ex-fiance/asker

Legally - I believe it varies by state

Sell it.

Meyer v. Mitnick :

The woman in that case argued that since the man was at fault for not following through, she should get to keep the $20,000 engagement ring. The man argued that the ring was a conditional gift. The “condition” was that in order to keep the ring, the wedding had to happen. The wedding would then fulfill the agreement and the gift would be completed. This wasn’t like a Christmas present. It clearly represented something more.

Finding fault and blame the other for the break up has nothing do with it. The Court in Meyer wrote: In sum, we hold that an engagement ring given in contemplation of marriage is an impliedly conditional gift that is a completed gift only upon marriage. If the engagement is called off, for whatever reason, the gift is not capable of becoming a completed gift and must be returned to the donor.

I'd sell it.

Any chance he'd give you a "do want you want with it" in writing? Just in case he decides one day he wants it back?

Get it in writing that it's yours to keep. However, my guess is that since he doesn't care it probably isn't really worth all that much if you try to sell it. Get what you can for it and buy yourself something nice.

Once upon a time in college I was engaged. When the guy broke it off and told me to keep the ring, I sent it back to him with a nasty note so I could get "the last word". He didn't know I found the receipt in the closet and knew the ring was only about $150. It wasn't worth it for me to try to sell it.

He said to keep it so I say keep it!! I got diamond earrings and a nice watch from a couple exes. No way I was giving back those gifts. It's the same thing in my opinion. You offered and he said do what you want. Enough said. The lady in the court case was not the norm. Most people don't go to court over jewelry. Most rings are also not $20,000.

I personally would give the ring back, but I am the UO. I wouldn't want the guilt hanging over my head of having it or using it to my benefit.

If you want to sell it, I would probably get in writing from your ex that it is yours to keep/do with it what you will.. that way it won't come back and bite you in the ass (it may or it may not, but don't risk it).

I mean, how much value are we talking here?

Either way, send him an email saying "are you sure you don't want the ring back" that way you have it in writing.

Then do whatever the hell you want with it.

Honestly, while there are a lot of good intentions on here, I would heed the recommendation of the lawyer that posted. If you have questions in regards to your state, reach out for advice there.

So glad to see others believe in seeking legal counsel.

I had a broken engagement about 10 years ago. I sold mine.

Get it in writing that he doesn't want it back, then sell it and take a relaxing trip with some of your best girlfriends

I'm not sure what the legality of it is, but I've always heard that if the one who gave the ring breaks it off, then the one who got it gets to keep it. If the one who got it breaks it off, then they return it to the one who gave it.

You don't have to give it back, it was a gift due to you accepting his request for marriage. He broke off the engagement for outside of you doing anything to cause the breakup. The ring is yours. You could pop out the stone and sell the gold. Have a new something made. Or donate it to a charity to auction....

Check the laws in YOUR state.

If, by law, you're allowed to keep it, I'd only give it back if it was a family heirloom which should stay in his family.

Sell it and take yourself on vacation

Sell it