Engagement party, did you have one? Who did you invite?

My sisters and best friend wanted to have one for us but I didn't want to. If I would have had one, It would have been for my immediate family and friends.

Most e-parties I go to specify no gifts on the invitation. A couple of friends of ours gave us bottles of wine and ring holders.

Well, I don't go to any party empty-handed, but I mean it's not like a shower where you're expected to bring gifts for the guests of honor--although apparently this is changing based on some of the replies here. A host/hostess gift is always appropriate, and a card and/or small congratulatory gift is a nice gesture.

Edited for clarity.

We aren't doing one, mostly because only my immediate family is in town so it wouldn't really make sense. I think if FHs family was local and our BM and GM were all local, it would be nice to do a dinner or something so everyone can get to know each other well before the wedding.

@MayBride the one big thing I'm thinking that could justify it is the fact that our parents haven't met each other yet, nor has the rest of our families and friends. His family and friends live a couple hours north of us so no one has met yet. Might be a good opportunity for everyone to meet rather than at the rehearsal dinner.

We had an engagement party, but it was also a bit of a going away party for FH (he moved to the US 3 days later). FH's parents hosted at their house.

I really enjoyed it. We invited close friends/family friends and any relatives in the area. We kept it local, but did let did let close relatives from OOT know in case they did want to come. It was very casual, as it sounds.

They made it an open house type thing. They told people to stop by anytime between 3 and 5. They had drinks and appetizers. People came by and chatted. Some stayed the whole time some came for a few minutes. It was fun to see so many of our friends and relatives together and I think people liked having a chance to see friends they may not get to see often.

My one caution is that we did feel guilty after. FHs mother, my mother, and I all specifically told people no gifts, but they brought them anyway. Some of those same people later gave me a shower present. I felt gift grabby even though that wasn't the intention.

My parents threw one for us, and I loved it. We live in TX and they are in NJ so they planned it for a week we were visiting. It was a great chance to spend time with all our east coast family and friends, because I'm sure a lot of them can't travel to Texas for the wedding. My mom did a brunch in the backyard and it was casual and fun. Lots of mimosas and corn-hole! If someone wants to throw you one, go for it!

ETA: Not sure if someone already said this, but don't invite anyone you wouldn't invite to the wedding. We didn't invite Texas family, just those on the east coast that I would send a wedding invitation to.

DH parents and Mine threw one for us! Just immediate family and BP getting to know everyone! It was nice, we had it right around Halloween and did a masquerade theme so everyone had fun. There was food and alcohol of course.

I've learned on WW that it's against etiquette to throw your own bridal shower/bachelorette parties etc. and I was never sure if this included engagement parties or not. Regardless of that though, I didn't think it was really necessary. I wouldn't even mind not having a bridal shower because I don't want my friends and family spending a bunch of money on me. I don't like being the center attention so if the wedding is the only day where that happens, that's totally fine with me! I've only been to one engagement party. It was for my step-brother and my dad and step-mom organized it. They have since broken up though.

No. It's too much if you're going to do a shower, bachelorette, rehearsal dinner, wedding/reception. That's PLENTY. My sister invited us over for dinner and made a special dessert.

We didn't have one. I will say that you may think half did not have one but many times small family gathers are engagement parties but sometimes friends aren't invited. For example I have a friend whose family made their annual family Christmas party into an engagement party (only the usually family members & the grooms family were invited) same usual set up stead they had toast to the couple and a congrats banner.

My parents threw us one in WV. We live in CA and they had it about 5 months after we got engaged and a year before we're getting married. We hadn't been able to celebrate with our friends and family since they all live on the east coast. It was also a good opportunity for our parents to meet since they are scattered across the US.

Make sure you don't invite anyone that isn't also invited to the wedding. And yes, despite saying that we didn't want gifts and we weren't registered, people brought us cards with cash and gift cards. We were very surprised and didn't realize anyone would do that.

My office threw me one. It was very generous and unexpected. I also did not want gifts although some people brought them. I had no say over the guest list. I was clear my wedding will be small. They wanted to invite people not invited to the wedding. Which I know is a huge no no. They stated this is what they wanted to do and they'd take the blame for the etiquette faux paux. It actually was very nice and I enjoyed myself.

We had twoish...

One my mom threw for her side of the family -ladies only. When she said she was going to I made sure she told people no gifts. She pushed back and asked me what the point was then and I told her it was to celebrate the engagement not get gits.

The second one was a quaziengagement party. It wasn't called an engagement party but we threw together a brunch for friends and close family in our town to come hang out and celebrate with us. Same thing, we said no gifts, no pot luck. We made a few egg bakes, pancakes, and a mimosa bar and chatted with friends and family about how they are doing leading up to the holidays. Both parties we talked about wedding things for maybe 1/20th of the time. The main reason was to get together with people that we are close with and celebrate.

They were a lot of fun for everyone pre-holidays!

Until I came to WW I thought an e-party was to announce your engagement to people who didn't already now. I only been to one. Which was my sister's e-party. It was just a small dinner at her house for close family and friends. That is when she told us all at once that she was engaged.

My parents threw us an engagement party outside on the patio of a local restaurant. It was very casual and low key, with brunch and mimosa bar. In total about 50 people came, which included local friends and family. My sister flew out from AZ with her daughters so that was seriously the highlight of the entire party/weekend! It was a great day but definitely not necessary if you're debating.

I feel the same as Elyse...we had ours 3 months after the engagement because of scheduling issues and I regret it and feel gift-grabby. The only plus we felt was that, although we've been dating since freshmen year of high school, this was the first time we had all our family together. If I were to do it again I would put "no gifts" on the invitation.

I didn't have one. Wasn't about to throw myself a party but would have been more than honored if someone had thrown me one. In the end I felt plenty celebrated with my shower, bachelorette and wedding.

We didn't bother. Didn't see the need of it and we didn't announce it in the paper or anything. Felt like posting it on Facebook was enough lol.

@OP, I get where you're coming from. I really didn't mean to bash e-parties. Just explaining why I didn't have one. Regarding parents meeting, a party may be a good option depending on personalities. My parents and FH's parents didn't meet until a couple of months ago. We just did a small family get together and dinner. Very low key. I don't think my parents would have done well meeting his parents for the first time in a party setting. It would have been overwhelming for them and they would have felt that they didn't get a good opportunity to actually talk to FH's parents. But, I think FH's parents would have done great in a party setting.

With respect to friends meeting, you could just have a get-together so everyone can meet and not call it an e-party. That way no one feels obligated. I think that should be separate from parent meeting anyways.