Drinks/ hosted? non hosted?

Also #teambridezilla I guess!

I haven't even read all of this yet but my mother is from Wisconsin. She got married there. All of my 7 aunts and uncle got married there. My cousins got married and are getting married in WI. One of my cousins plans weddings for a living there.

No it is NOT normal in WI. You just have a group of friends who lack etiquette.

I live in Minnesota, went to school in Wisconsin. I have been back there for several weddings of college friends in the last few years and none of them had cash bars. Just because other people do it doesn't make it ok.

@cats. First off, don't be rude about my name. It's not that off. Secondly, that's awesome that your friend had an open beer and wine reception in WI and it went fine. As I said earlier, I will be supplying beer (and possibly wine).

After I left earlier today I called my best friend to ask if I was totally off base. She did some googling and came up with an answer in line with what everyone is saying. Only offer what you can afford. That's cool for you, but would not fly with my guests. If they knew the bar had the booze they wanted and they couldn't buy it they would leave. It's just a little different here. Maybe my group is different than yours, that's cool. I think the main point is that everyone gets offered free booze and that (in my case) other expectations are met. I'm not going to piss my family off in the name of good etiquette.

Eta- spelling

A lot of my guests would prefer liquor as well. We don't have a lot of beer drinkers. That's why we looked for a venue where we would be able to afford to offer liquor as an option. But that being said I think hosting beer and wine is just fine you don't have to offer liquor.

We are doing beer and wine only. Guests can still get drunk and have a great time but it will cut down on costs, hangovers, and embarrassing moments.

What you want to have happen and what will are two different things. Always.

The main point is that you don't invite 250 guests if you can't afford to offer them drinks. Because that means you can't mean you can't afford to host 250 guests.

OP and Veronica -- both of you are either too frugal (that's the nice way of saying it) to host your guests with alcohol or you can't afford it unless you're willing to cut your guest list -- but you won't do that. Fine, do it the way you want to, but don't get bent out of shape when your guests are whispering and ready to leave after dinner (and if those guests had an inkling of the way you referred to them on a wedding forum, they'd leave before dinner). Oh, and newsflash, they're going to talk and you deserve whatever they have to say. How could you put a price tag on a wedding refreshment that you've made available to guests? Ditch the cash bar and at least give these ADULT guests wine or beer.

Cash bars suck, and they suck because they reveal the intention of the hosts. You want your guests to drink booze because you know that a party with alcohol is a lot more fun than a party with lemonade, sweet tea, and coffee, and you don't want your poorly hosted party to end early. So, you're willing to deal with the eyerolling of the guests, and you have no guilt despite the fact you know that your cash bar customers --- oops, excuse me...guests -- are willing to tolerate your cash bar. Why not just go dry? We all know why.

Apparently, you have a bag full of reasons to justify asking your guests to pay for the party element that will keep your wedding going. Why not charge them to pay for apps while you're at it?

Man up, ladies -- all two of you. Either have a dry wedding or a hosted bar. Seriously, two drinks "and they're on their own". What a gross attitude. Why bother inviting people you can speak this way about? Actually, we all know why you're inviting them.

I am so bored with this ridiculous argument. If you're having a party, host it. I'm not sure how you can hold your head up after playing the cash bar game...and if you don't get it, you're socially hopeless.

Yup, it's Wednesday.

It was my sister, not my friend. I wasn't being rude about your name, I just couldn't be bothered on researching how to spell it because I was sure you'd ignore my comment anyway. And I was right! :-))))

I stopped reading after @ Julia T. becuase um. MILKSHAKE BAR = AMAZING. "Ma milkshake brings all the boys to the bar". In other news, foot the booze bill girl.

^^ after reading all these comments. My take away is... I NEED A MILKSHAKE BAR!!!

And of course... You pay, your guest didn't ask to come to your wedding.