Dollar Dance with a Twist

I think it's an extremely sweet gesture but to be honest, if I were your wedding guest I would feel manipulated into donating. I'm not a fan of the dollar dance any way it's presented, and although I know you have the best of intentions, it just feels like extortion. If your family is not used to the dollar dance custom, there is a good chance that some of them will feel the way I do, and you may end up with hard feelings.

If you want to make a donation to the MS society (trust me, I get this...both my parents have MS) then do so on your own, without all the fanfare.

Personally, not a fan of money dances to start with, and certainly not a fan of having other people dictate where my donation funds go to.

Take some of the money that you'll receive from gifts and put it towards that if you so choose. But don't make people donate to a charity of your choice.

I'm sorry, but I'm with doeydo and Laura on this one.

That is a fantastic idea! I've been to a wedding that instead of favors, they donated on behalf of everyone the money they would have spent to the Breast Cancer Foundation. I thought that was the best idea there was!

I think if it's already a tradition and something your guests are used to its an awesome idea!

I love the idea

I think it's a bad decision. Forcing wedding guests into giving donations isn't cool.

Plenty of other ways to honor someone at your wedding, such as a toast.

Thank you for all the opinions ladies! With your help and a long discussion with my FH we have decided to do this. I understand the concern with "forcing" people to donate to a cause and I asked my parents their opinion as well, they both thought it was an excellent idea and didn't think anyone in our family/friends would be put off by it. One of my aunts even offered to match whatever money we make and donate that as well!

Aww thats so sweet

"Forcing wedding guests into giving donations isn't cool." REALLY?? And forcing them into giving gifts at a bridal shower AND a wedding is cool? I don't get it. I've worked for a breast cancer foundation for years and held a few fundraisers. Giving people a party and asking for a few donations has never been a problem for me.

I think that's a great idea.

I think its awesome! The dollar dance is a must with my family and my FHs family has never heard of it. We are doing it anyway. Maybe they will thibk its tacky or be judgy, but honestly, i dont give a crap.

@AugustBride - there is no requirement for a guest to give a gift at a wedding. Showers are inherently a gift giving event but weddings are not. Many guests will give a gift at a wedding, but they are not expected and there is nothing wrong with NOT giving a wedding gift.

Either way, your guests are choosing to provide YOU with something. A lot of people are VERY specific on which charities they support, and will not donate to a certain charity based on their business practices, ethics, etc. If you want to make a donation, then do so quietly - without your friends and family being shown 'hey, look at us! We're giving to charity! Aren't we awesome!'

We also will not be forcing people to participate. I've been to plenty of weddings where the dollar dance happens and there is still a good amount of people just standing to the side and watching. If they don't want to participate they don't have to - they can go get a drink or a treat from the candy buffet and come back five minutes later when the song is done.

There is NOTHING wrong with the dollar dance! And I think this is such a sweet and great idea! I love your little twist on it! We are also doing a dollar dance and our wedding and we are pretty excited about it all! I have never been to a wedding where there wasn't one. Everytime I go to a wedding I expect there to be one. Its not forcing anyone into anything. Its a fun way to get to spend more time with your guests as well.

Awesome idea

I like that idea a lot!

I think this is fantastic. You are keeping a tradition from FH's family and honoring his father. If people don't want to give, they won't. No harm. I think most people will give and will love this.

I think it's a nice idea! Make sure it's announce why you guys are doing it

Another option is to just have a booth set up with a blurb and people can donate more privately too.

Generally I am not a fan of the dollar dances, but this I like.