Dad doesn't wanna dance...

I'd only do it with my brother but he's on deployment in Germany and cannot get leave. My other brother and I don't relate much and lives out of the country

Tell your grandma. She might make it happen for you. Lol.

View Quoted Comment I thought of it but he's no easily led by her or anyone lol and she would blow my cover she's not good for this lol

Let him listen to the song I Don’t Dance by Lee Brice. I’ve seen a few people use that song before and it’s always cute. Maybe that will change his mind

View Quoted Comment I did I sent it to him when I asked.

I am so sorry. That has to be hard. Did you explain to him how you feel?

View Quoted Comment Nope lol he wouldn't listen and he'll just throw in the fact that we're Christian and we don't really do the whole dance thing (I know its not like this for many but he's extremely traditional and old school). It would be a waste of time.

View Quoted Comment I am sorry.

4 minutes is a really long time! Consider cutting it shorter to 1.5-2 minutes and see if he's more open to it. He could just be really nervous about being the center of attention with you?

View Quoted Comment Definitely not, it has nothing to do with shyness. My dad refuses to do a lot of things he considers worldly traditions because he's been ordained as a pastor. And if back in the day he could bust moves to our Hispanic cutlure music with a beer in his hand, he can spare for a special moment that just requires swaying back and forth. 1 minute or a little more only gives us time to gather on the dance floor and grab our hands.

If it means that much to you, tell your dad how important it is. Sit him down and tell him it really hurts you that he won't do this for you. If that doesn't work, have a special dance with someone else. Step dad, FIL, special male figure in your life...could be anyone. Choose a different song and just do it that way. If you're worried about upsetting your dad, don't blindside him with it, explain to him that having a special dance means a LOT to you and that you'll ask someone else. Who knows, maybe he'll come around to the idea.

Oh, 4 minutes might not sound like a long time to you but you'd get more than "just grabbing hands" if you cut the song shorter. A dance like that can get uncomfortable after a minute or so. Or you could even ask other father/daughter couples to join you on the dance floor half way through the song

My dad doesn't dance either, so we made a deal. He is dancing to the last verse of Butterfly Kisses with me (walk me down the aisle dad it's just about time, does my wedding dress look pretty dad, daddy don't cry! etc.) and then after that verse is over he's cutting the music to the chicken dance, something we've danced to together at various events we've gone to since I was a little girl. This way, we get both that sweet moment of our "last" dance together, and the silly part of making everyone laugh and join us on the dance floor. Maybe you could convince your dad to dance to just one verse if you explain how important it is? Also, practice dancing at home together. A slow rocking back and forth is all anyone would be "expecting" from the dance, nothing crazy.

It is so hard if he does not want to do it. . . A lot of people who are close to their parents, love them and get along, do not do parent dances. They are not a necessary part of a wedding at all. If you watch TV and movies, every one seems to do about 10 things " everyone" does. But in real life, most couples have chosen 2-4 special things from all the possibilities, and that is all. Dance with your honey. If you are interested in another spotlight dance, grandfather, best friend other than FI, brother, cousin, fine. Or skip it. Your father is an adult. He does not want to do it. Move on. Groom can still dance with his mom if he wants. Ask your father if he would like to give a 2 minute speech and a toast to your happy future. Another Dad tradition that many, not all, people do. . . If you have to twist someone's arm to do something supposed to be sentimental, it is meaningless. So skip the dance, do not push.

Note: A toast does not have to be with liquor. Simply giving wishes or even a prayer for a happy future life.

Play the song for him and have him practice with you how you would dance that day.

Regardless of what happens don’t let that upset you and enjoy your special day.

View Quoted Comment How would this remove her father's religious objection to dancing? He is a pastor, and this is his faith. He is not saying no one can dance. He says he won't. This is a religion objection many make. People on here usually oppose anyone asking the couple to override it change their religious practices. There are 2 posts up now, parents want a wedding in the RC church, couple doesn't, and people go on about it not being any parent's option to say anything about the couple's religious choices. Why is it okay to beg/ ask/ push her father to dance? . . . Actually, even aside from religion, when a bride asks any one to do anything aside from wear the dress or suit, and walk down the aisle, things are always optional. Family and bridal party are not paid employees, not actors or models or performers. They can be asked to dance with someone, or do a dance routine, or wear their hair a certain way, or to get professional HMU services. But if an adult says, I do not want to do that, it is not the couple's right to require anything except that people attending obey the law, and exhibit usual acceptable social behavior. Would you like to dance, Daddy? No, Stephanie, I would rather not dance. . . That is as far as it is polite to go, even if it is not a religious objection. For everyone at any wedding, or dance. And anyone with good manners accepts the fact that that person does not want to dance, with no further cajoling or argument.

What if you show him som videos of father daughter dances. Maybe seeing an example will make him feel like he can do it. I also think if you cut down the time a bit it might help convince him.

View Quoted Comment He lives in another state, when i call him he barely keeps me five minutes on the phone and he didn't wanna talk about it because he was going to go eat so he said we'll catch up another time

View Quoted Comment He lives in another state. And since I was little he was never the kind to dance with me or do something that was "our thing".

View Quoted Comment It is a big deal for me because I no longer have my mother anymore, she passed. My grandma, her mom, passed recently, my grandfather on my mom's behalf has been deceased and my living grandfather cannot travel. I don't have a large family of cousins uncles and aunts and who I have lives out of the country and cannot attend. It's not about having a spotlight dance, there's a big meaning for me behind the song I had in mind with my dad. I'd do it with my brother which in an earlier comment I stated he's deployed in Germany. Had my mother been here I wouldn't even think about this. I understand when we post here we have to be open to opinions but they don't have to be harsh either, so "move on" because I obviously understand my father is an adult, I have never asked anything of him especially like this, not asking for pitty just empathy. Because whenever my father has asked something of me I never said no even if I didn't want to because I love him enough to not hurt his feelings. And I am allowing him to say a prayer based on his request although I had already had that in mind