Children exception for out-of-town guests?

You may have a little push back from other guests with children, but you have to stand your ground. Maybe your immediate family and wedding party could spread the word in conversation that you're not having children but had to make an exception for this family that's traveling so far.

We are also doing this. My FMIL is adopting two children her only other babysitters are family that also will be at the wedding. I felt it wouldn't be a good idea to tell my FMIL no lol. So yeah, they are invited. Everyone else we are asking that they kiddo's stay home and so far everyone has been fine with it.

I say it's your wedding so who gives a shit what anybody else thinks. Easier said then done I know but I think you're bring reasonable.

You get to enforce or relax that as much as you want. Our general line is : no kids. For those that are flying in, we take those on a case by case basis. No one's been offended, so it's working out!

I think it could get tricky. I imagine there are people who will have wanted to bring their kids, hear back that it's a child-free wedding, and then see that an exception was made for someone else.

Instead of having the kids at the wedding, can you provide a babysitter? How old are they?

I think this is difficult. People may well get offended, and if you're okay with that, let it go. It's your wedding, and in reality, your say goes. But if you really don't want to upset people, could you possibly look into a babysitter for the two out of town kids? That way you're less likely to ruffle feathers.

It is definitely fair. The people who give you a hard time will do it anyways.

My out of town aunt & uncle brought their two kids to our wedding. Along with my brother, those were the only kids that attended/were invited. No one said anything to us. No one knows my aunt & uncle so they probably just assumed we didn't invite kids, but they brought theirs anyway.

I wouldn't be offended in that particular situation since the relatives are traveling so far.

But, in a different situation I would be pissed (as in they are driving an hour and want to bring their kids). The only reason I say this is because I was invited to two weddings - both out of town and required planes/hotels etc. - having an autistic child makes it hard to attend these types of functions. My family knows that - and have been aware of my son's diagnosis for years.

They excluded my son from both weddings but allowed numerous other guests to bring children - they didnt travel at all (other than from surrounding areas). I was pissed and hurt that they would exclude my son but include others.

It doesn't seem like you are doign that though - so I wouldn't expect anyone to be upset.

I think it will be fine. They might especially get it when they open their mouths and hear Scottish accents coming from that group of people.

We only had 2 kids at our wedding, but it was a child free event for everyone else. One was my cousin, who was 12, but extremely mature, and the daughter of one of my bridesmaids. My other little cousin who is 5 came too, but that's cause nobody was around to watch him. My wedding was 4 hours from home for them. My side of the family was all with us and his other side of the family is from Alabama. Nobody said anything, and everything was fine.

Completely fair, I am not having children at the wedding either but would make that exception

If I went to another country for a wedding where I didn't know anyone else, I'd want my kids near me. My OOT relatives all brought their kids and it was fine.

Totally fair. You may or may not be asked about it, but you have a good answer/reason for it, so you will be fine. We're doing something similar--friends who are coming in from out of town and wouldn't be able to come without their children can bring their children. For in-town friends, no kids.

Thanks for all the comments. This was helpful and reassuring.