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Savvy November 2022

Can you invite people to the bachelorette and not the bridal shower?

Keri, on January 19, 2022 at 12:13 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 3

First of all, I know I am not in charge of planning either of the events, but I do need to come up with the guest list.

I have a few friends that I want to invite to the bachelorette but not the bridal shower (friends that are not in my bridal party). I just want to make sure this is acceptable etiquette.

Four of the guests are couples and I am much closer to their male counterparts. We are not having males at the shower but I am okay with having males at the bachelorette. I do not consider the females of these two couples to be close friends, which is why I wasn't going to invite them to the shower.

The other is a female friend that I am fairly close with but not close enough to make it into the bridal party, if that makes sense. She would not know anyone at the shower and so I wasn't going to invite her to it for that reason.

Another question I have- do I need to invite spouses/ fiancés/ girlfriends of the groomsmen to the shower?

Thanks everyone!


Latest activity by Jacks, on January 19, 2022 at 5:28 PM
  • Cece
    Master November 2022
    Cece ·
    • Flag
    It is absolutely ok to invite people to your bachelorette party that won’t be invited to your shower, as long as they are invited to the wedding.
    And no, there is no rule that says you have to invite the spouses of the groomsmen to your shower
    • Reply
  • JA
    Expert March 2022
    JA ·
    • Flag

    Ultimately whoever you want to invite, that's who you should invite. That being said, to your specific questions:

    Because you are not inviting guys to the shower, I think that is fine and they can def come for the bach party (In contrast, I had my two best guy friends at my bach and my bridal shower, no other men for either event.) For the girl who wont know anyone at the shower, I would still invite her. She can make the call on if she wants to come or not. I think it would be rude to not invite her.

    For gf/spouses of groomsmen, that's an all or nothing if you aren't super close with any of them. Either invite them all or don't invite any. I personally didn't invite any of them because my FH has a lot of women in the family so my bridal shower guest list was pretty large as is and adding 9 other women wouldve been too much. I see them all at least once a month, but none of them were offended

    • Reply
  • Jacks
    Champion November 2054
    Jacks ·
    • Flag

    Yes that's fine.

    The only hard and fast rule is that everyone invited to pre-wedding events must be invited to the wedding.

    • Reply

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