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OregonEmily
Master August 2014

Can my ex husband walk me down the aisle?

OregonEmily, on July 25, 2014 at 11:26 AM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 294

His name was Bernard. We were married for six and a half years and very much in love. We decided (mutually) to split because after his 3rd heart attack and his quadruple bypass, he could no longer satisfy me sexually. We tried introducing a surrogate sex partner into our relationship, but it made...

His name was Bernard. We were married for six and a half years and very much in love. We decided (mutually) to split because after his 3rd heart attack and his quadruple bypass, he could no longer satisfy me sexually. We tried introducing a surrogate sex partner into our relationship, but it made Bernard sad to watch me have sex with a strapping, young man. I did my best to maintain eye contact with my husband and even shout out his name, but the tears still rolled down his cheeks as he watched Chad and I make love.

Eventually, Bernard and I parted ways and he gave his blessing for me and the surrogate sex partner to get married. So my question is, would it be inappropriate for my ex husband to walk (or roll, since he's in a wheelchair) me down the aisle? I think it's almost poetic since my old lover is handing me off to my new one. Also, Bernard is like a father to me, since he's 40 years my senior.

What would you do?

Happy Friday ladies! Have fun!

294 Comments

  • *Mrs_D*
    Master October 2014
    *Mrs_D* ·
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    The best part about him being in a wheelchair is you don't have to worry about providing a chair for him if you decide to make it a "bring your own lawnchair" wedding. Go for it!

    • Reply
  • Zzil
    Master October 2014
    Zzil ·
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    I might be....

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  • AndixLyn
    Master June 2015
    AndixLyn ·
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    I love that i read this and was like, dang thats a really open loving relationship. hahaha i love you.

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  • Caylin C.
    Master August 2015
    Caylin C. ·
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    As long as he agrees to only eat one hotdog.

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  • KristenMeowza
    Master October 2014
    KristenMeowza ·
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    Is this a pot luck wedding? I'll bring the green bean casserole.

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  • OregonEmily
    Master August 2014
    OregonEmily ·
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    @Kristen- I've heard it before Kristen. You say you'll bring the casserole, but you make me reimburse you for the ingredients and electricity to bake it!

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  • Maritza
    Master April 2015
    Maritza ·
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    LMAO!!! She had me going there for a second.. I'm like is she for real?? Hahahaha! Invite Bernard to the honeymoon too.. for good times sake! C'mon! :-)

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  • Mrs. Ames
    Devoted January 2015
    Mrs. Ames ·
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    Why did I take this seriously? I merely peed myself.

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  • Carr
    Devoted June 2017
    Carr ·
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    @ OregonEmily, make sure you are the sole beneficiary for his life insurance first. You would be doing him a solid by making him come and go at the same time....

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  • *Mrs_D*
    Master October 2014
    *Mrs_D* ·
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    Hey, does your ex husband happen to have any foodstamps? I hear that is a great way to pay for wedding food! Just an idea...

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  • Miss P.
    Master September 2014
    Miss P. ·
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    Oh my god. I thought you were serious at first too. I'm glad you aren't. You created a really uncomfortable image. lol Specifically the part about calling another man's name out while you bang someone else and he's watching with tears of sadness.

    • Reply
  • L + R
    Master September 2014
    L + R ·
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    This disgusted me until I got to the "happy friday" part. Jeez Louise! Happy Friday!

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  • Emma
    Master October 2024
    Emma ·
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    Your ex-husband sounds like a pansy. Crying when you're making love with another man in front of him? What. A. Wuss.

    :-D

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  • Kasheena
    Super October 2014
    Kasheena ·
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    LMBO!!!!! You are hilarious!!!

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  • OregonEmily
    Master August 2014
    OregonEmily ·
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    @Carr- You totally win for best Double entendre!!! Well done!

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  • *Mrs_D*
    Master October 2014
    *Mrs_D* ·
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    I agree with AugustBride. Tell that man to GROW A PAIR!

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  • Emma
    Master October 2024
    Emma ·
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    .


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  • Milwaukee_Bride
    VIP August 2014
    Milwaukee_Bride ·
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    This was EXACTLY what i need to brighten my day...thanks EMILY!

    Are you going to have your honeymoon at schlitterbahn? I think that would be super romantic..

    • Reply
  • OregonEmily
    Master August 2014
    OregonEmily ·
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    You guys must think I'm a total weirdo! I'm blown away by how many people believed this!

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  • Carr
    Devoted June 2017
    Carr ·
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    @ OregonEmily (in my Elvis voice) well thank you ma'am, thank you

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