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Teresa
Devoted October 2020

Bridesmaids changing out of dresses

Teresa, on September 16, 2020 at 12:18 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 45
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OK ladies, I have a question for you all. How do you feel about the bridesmaids, really just ONE changing out of their dresses right after the wedding?

Here's my thinking on it:
1. I told you to pick your dress and encouraged you to get a style you wanted and would be comfortable in ALL day.

2. I have said we will be doing the dances and pictures throughout the entire day, so I want us to all look fabulous!

3. Isn't it just sort of expected that if you are in the wedding party you stay dressed up all night?
4. Again, because they are so important to me....PICTURES!

OK fire away just remember I am 17 days from the wedding, and truly not trying to be a BRIDEZILLA! But, I do not want to budge on this matter. Am I wrong here?


45 Comments

Latest activity by Kimberly, on September 22, 2020 at 12:47 PM
  • Hannah
    Rockstar July 2019
    Hannah Online ·
    • Flag
    I have never heard of or seen bridesmaids change outfits between the ceremony and reception.
    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Expert October 2020
    Kimberly ·
    • Flag
    It’s a bit weird, yeah. I’m totally on board for changing to more comfortable shoes for the reception to dance in, but not an entire outfit change. I don’t think you are bridezilla here at all.
    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I’ve never seen that happen before but I told mine if they wanted to that’s ok aha but then again I only did photos before ceremony so I didn’t care much for the party reception photos in them being in a different dress.
    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Master November 2022
    Chrysta ·
    • Flag
    Personally, I have never seen bridesmaids change out of their dresses after the ceremony. Every wedding I have been to or been in bridesmaids have left their dresses on for the entire day/evening. It’s kind of strange they want to change out of them, especially when you allowed them to pick out their own dresses. Usually I would think it would be because they didn’t like the dresses or found them uncomfortable, but obviously that isn’t the case since they picked them out. I don’t understand why you would want to change out of one dress and into another one 🤔 I would just tell them that you would like them to stay in their dresses the entire time for pictures. And maybe try to figure out why exactly they are wanting to change out of them
    • Reply
  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    Neither have I so I didn't want to be a jerk about this but I truly feel like she needs to stay in her dress. Not to mention she is the only one of 4 that wants to change. Then to add to it, she wants to change into jeans and a t-shirt...UH NO!

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  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    Shoes are not even mandatory LOL she hates anything but Chucks on her feet so she is hiding those under her dress. Smiley smile

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  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    I could deal if we were dong the first look but FH is so NOT having that. He says he won't do anything to jinx it LOL

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  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    The other 3 girls are not wanting to change. The one does because she "feels fat" she's a size 6 and no gut at all but I get it too. We all have some body issues. I told her no but just wanted to make sure I wasn't being unreasonable. She also want to change into jeans and a t-shirt...Smiley sad

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  • Jana
    Master October 2022
    Jana ·
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    I wasn't aware this was a thing nor have I ever seen it
    • Reply
  • Kimberly
    Expert October 2020
    Kimberly ·
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    You aren’t being unreasonable. This is silly that she can’t be in a dress SHE picked out for a few hours of a single evening.
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  • Chrysta
    Master November 2022
    Chrysta ·
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    Oh OK, so it isn’t all the bridesmaids, it’s just one girl in particular. In that case, I wouldn’t even worry about it. I would just tell her she needs to remain in her dress for photos. Would it be possible for her to change into what she feels comfortable in halfway through the reception, after you have gotten plenty of pictures?
    • Reply
  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    I am not totally against it. I just want to make sure that she understands it would need to be a majority of the day. From roughly 2 to 8 or 9.

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  • Chrysta
    Master November 2022
    Chrysta ·
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    I think that is an awesome compromise! I would just spell that out for her – that she needs to be in the dress from this hour to this hour in order to capture the pictures you need, then she can feel free to change into whatever she feels comfortable in
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Rockstar July 2019
    Hannah Online ·
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    Yikes. Even if she did change, I would still expect it to be the formality level of the wedding.
    • Reply
  • Marissa
    Expert October 2020
    Marissa ·
    • Flag

    So I'm in a similar situation as you. I will be having one bridesmaid (out of 4) change out of her dress after the ceremony and family photos. However, my bridesmaid is my youngest sister (16 years old) and a complete tomboy. She hates wearing dresses and when I first asked her to be my bridesmaid I wasn't even going to make her wear one. I wanted her to be comfortable. But then she changed her mind and decided to wear a dress (thank god lol). So then we compromised: she will change into different clothes after the ceremony and family pictures so she's comfortable for the rest of the night, and I had no problem with this.

    I totally don't think you're being unreasonable and when she first got the dress she should have picked the best one she felt comfortable in. But if she's not going to listen to you, maybe you can also compromise and just tell her she can change right after the ceremony and any important photos? OR if it's because of body issues, has she tried any type shapewear?

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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    I think it’s fine to change once the reception “events” are over, like the spotlight dances, speeches, etc. At that point it’s just dancing and it’s not like you’ll be taking formal photos of that part.
    • Reply
  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    She is totally against the shapeware idea. I tried to mention it and compromise with her that she can change after all the photos and whatnot but we are currently battling about the clothes she wants to change into, jeans and a t-shirt. I wouldn't mind her changing as long as it was still nice clothes.

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  • Teresa
    Devoted October 2020
    Teresa ·
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    Agreed, but not into jeans and a t-shirt. She's still part of the bridal party no matter what the hour is. I wouldn't mind IF she can agree that she waits, which she is NOT happy about and if she was wearing something a little nicer than jeans and a t-shirt. Maybe more long the lines of business casual... I could even do the jeans as long as she was willing to wear a nice blouse with them.

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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    I guess we have different opinions on that. Once the events are over, the bridal party has fulfilled all of their duties. It was much more important to me that my friends had fun at my wedding reception than what they wear. Just like I wouldn't have kicked any other guest out for wearing jeans, I wouldn't be upset with my bridesmaid either.

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  • Molly
    Devoted August 2021
    Molly ·
    • Flag

    I was a bridesmaid last year and one of the bridesmaids (it was held at Wisconsin Dells) left after dinner to go to the waterpark. I was appalled that she wouldn't want to stay to support the bride. She later came back during late-night snacks dressed in pj pants and a t-shirt (yikes!). Now her sister (MOH) and her sister's friend (who was her PO) did change into leggings and a sweater (after asking the bride) but that was like at 10 PM (the wedding didn't end till midnight and the photographer had already left). I did change into my getting ready clothes around 11:30 mainly because my FH and I were going to help the bride and groom to their hotel room (which was good because they were a bit drunk and if I had on my dress, the bride would have stepped on it multiple times). I think it was fine when people changed cause her wedding was more semi-formal/causal especially as the night went on.

    However, if your wedding is more of a formal event I don't think they should be changing! Especially since you let them chose styles they are comfortable in. I don't think I'd be comfortable with any of my bridesmaids changing at any time (except maybe at the very end of the night).


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