Bride wants 4 day Bachelorette Party in another country...

I felt bad about having one full stop and my friends spending money on me! It was only dinner and drinks, and some paid to stay in a apartment for the night in the city as didn't as they didn't want to drive home that was their choice. Asking your friends to fly to another country is crazy! Here you often hear of Bach parties flying to Europe (from Ireland) just for a weekend. That I even find crazy and it's not Aisa, it's only a 2 hour flight! She shouldn't assume her fiends can afford 4 days away like that. Particularly if she know all of your circumstances as you've mentioned!

ASIA?!?! What! You are definitely not the only BM to be worried about the feasibility of that (which is not feasible, btw), and they will appreciate you for speaking up. That is literally ridiculous. She needs a big dose of reality, and I think if she is so out of reality now, you are perfectly in your right to step down from being a BM. There's no telling the amount of crazy it will be later, closer to the wedding.

Asia!?? Unless you live overseas this seems crazy!! How can someone think they can do a four trip to Asia. Let alone the costs. I feel badly for you. I thinks it's crazy she is even asking you all to consider this. You can be honest and tell her you are happy to do something local.......or seminlocal.

Unless she's taking you all there in her teleportation device, tell her to have a nice time and to send you a postcard. What the hell happens to some people when they get that ring on their finger? She's getting married, not being elevated to Supreme Ruler of the World.

Wow, the entitlement of some people... tell her no to the trip, but you can still be a BM. Attending the bachelorette party/trip isn't mandatory. Although I'd be worried about what else she'll ask her BMs to do, if she has the balls to ask you to plan a trip to Asia for her ...

Has she ever flown to asia? If you want 4 days there, you have to budget for 6 from the US, Canada or Mexico. You automatically lose a day over the dateline and the average flight is 14+ hours.

That is completely absurd! If she wants to fly there, let her. Tell her no.

I would get together with the other girls and discuss what days and locations best fit your schedules and your budgets. Then politely explain to the bride that her dream bachelorette party simply isn't do-able but that you have something else planned and that you are going to surprise her with a great time. No need to step down you got this!

You can opt out of the party. If she doesn't like it, go ahead and drop out. These destination bach parties are insane.

How old is she? Her request is ridiculous and illogical.

My friend was in her friends wedding, which ended up being before hers, however it was a 2 week difference, and she just couldn't spend a long weekend in Mexico due to having to plan her own events and the expense. Just say unfortunately some things are going to overlap with the planning of yours, and you won't be able to go to the bachelorette party. I'm sure she will understand.

I would never in a million years expect my girls to spend ridiculous money on flights for a bach party, but if that's what's going to be planned, you should just be able to be honest with her/them and say you cannot afford to contribute.

One of my bridesmaids almost didn't attend my bachelorette last weekend (we camped for two nights, 3 hours away in a yurt) because of finances, since she is headed to Disney World with her 3 kids this weekend. I had no idea what exactly was being planned (when they asked what I wanted to do, I just told them "camping in NH"), but I would NEVER think she should step down from being a bridesmaid just because she couldn't attend a silly party. I would hope ALL my girls would feel comfortable enough just being honest with me, as I am the last person that wants to financially burden anyone because of my wedding.

The entitlement is strong with that one, I see. I'd be declining that trip so so fast.

You aren't obligated to attend

Yeah, there's no way I'd be going on that trip. That is a crazy request for a bachelorette party!

I want a four day party in another country too. I also want a puppy to bring me a pint of ice cream and two million dollars. But, alas...

You can absolutely decline to participate in a bachelorette party, much less an international one (seriously, WTF).

I had a bridesmaid who lives across the country who couldn't afford two cross country flights in two months. She didn't make it to my bachelorette (which was a wine and painting night with a little bar hopping in our town). Nbd. Still love her and she still loves me. We had an awesome time at the wedding.

"Settle" for Mexico but prefers Asia? No way is she entitled to a trip that costs literally thousands of dollars.

This seems a bit much to me.

"Midnight in Paris" themed bachelorette party maybe?

Tf. Asia?! No you don't have to go and you shouldn't step down from being a bridesmaid. Wow, we're spending the weekend about an hour from home for my bachelorette and I was scared even that would be inconveniencing some of my girls. Luckily it isn't. But Asia?! Wow.

I've been a bridesmaid in a wedding and couldn't afford the bachlorette destination. I told my friend, she understood, and she went and had a great time with others. I'm bummed I missed it, but I was still in her wedding and enjoyed the other parties.