Bride planning bachelorette party

You don’t plan a party in your honor. There’s no reason they can’t plan it as a group. You don’t need to pick a MOH. They’re adults and can figure it out. If they don’t, you don’t have a bachelorette party.

I agree.. no planning your own party.

If there is no MOH, the bridesmaids collaborate to plan your party. It is fine to give them ideas of what you may prefer, however you do not plan and host your party.

You can tell them a couple of things you really really would like for the bachelorette. I told my girls a stripper is a must, but other than that I wouldn't put the stress of planning the bachelorette on yourself. If you want to do it in the mountains mention that and let them all work together to pan it.

I also had 3 BMs and no MOH and they were perfectly capable of collaborating together to plan both the shower and the bachelorette party. For the bachelorette party they came up with different ideas and asked me to pick my favorite. We ended up doing a spa day. They did this themselves and didn't need me to plan. That's the way it should be. You should not be planning your own bachelorette party.

I honestly don’t think I’m even having a bachelorette party. 3 of my BMs live out of state and my MOH is 20. I told my MOH to not worry about it because I’d never ask the other girls to travel. My MOH might try to plan a joint dinner and Topgolf thing with my FH and his groomsmen but idk, I’m not involved she just asked for ideas because we aren’t going to bar hop either. You really shouldn’t plan your own. It’s supposed to be in your honor. If you want to have a party with you friends don’t call it a bachelorette party.

If anyone else chooses to plan a bachelorette in your honor, they are likely to ask your preference. If they don't choose to host, you don't have one. Grown up adults do not plan parties in their own honor.

If you have no MOH then your bridemaid's plan it together. It is very rude and horrible etiquette to plan your own party!

I’m not even having any bridesmaids at all. Our two daughters are going to be walked down the aisle by my two older brothers. I was kind iffy to not having a bridal party but my mom assured me that all of the “festivities” would be fully taken care of by family and friends even with no bridal party.

You don't need an MoH. And while it's improper to throw the party in your honor, you could say that instead of a party in your honor you want to do an active, like hiking, with your bridesmaids as a party in your honor, all eyes on me, pub crawl is not your thing. My FH and I aren't doing bachelor and bachelorette parties, we're planning to bring all our party to an Escape Room as a "thanks for sharing this special day with me" event.
Tldr; If you don't want an all eyes on me party and would rather plan an event, a solution would be to not call it a bachelorette party and kindly tell your BM that you prefer to take them all hiking instead as an outing.

Sorry. You really should not be planning your own bachelorette party. Let go of your inner control freak and let your bridesmaids plan it for you.

View Quoted Comment Thank you! I like that idea. FH and I were thinking of BM v GM paintball and stuff like that throughout the day, so we just won’t call it a bachelor/bachelorette party per se. I’m more comfortable when everything is how I plan so that seems like the best option for us!

You do not need to have a MOH but you also do not need to plan your own party. If your BM's wish to have a bachelorette party or bridal shower you could always advise them as to what you would like and let them plan it. My daughter told her bridesmaids that she didn't want male strippers, sex items, raunchiness, etc for her party. She wanted something fun and respectful. She also stated that she did not want anyone to become wasted. I know some people will respond and tell me that the has no right to tell people how to act...

I think it is completely rude of you to throw yourself a party. And as a bridesmaid I would be offended if you tried to plan it yourself and didn't even let me do that for you. No matter how you word it it is basically going to offend them. If they don't know you well enough to know you wouldn't want the traditional party then in my opinion they may not know you well enough to be that close to you.

I think it you phrase it more as just throwing a party to celebrate with your friends before the wedding, it's perfectly okay to plan something special yourself. I honestly have never heard of a bride or groom not planning their own parties for the most part. I would just ask their opinions on what you were thinking of doing and try to get them all involved in the process so it's more of a group effort!

View Quoted Comment I agree. I think it’s ok for you to plan something special for yourself and that if they want to be involved in the planning of it, then you should fine a way to let them help with the process.

“Girls night” is one thing but you don’t plan your own bach. If you want to plan a completely non-wedding-related girls night, do that.

When I was the MOH for my friend I just asked her what kind of party she wanted. I know it is hard to let other people plan things for you but I’m sure your friends would ask you what you would like to do.

I think if you want to plan it go for it, who cares if "you're not supposed to" or will come off as rude. You only get one why not make sure it's going to be something you enjoy. I see it less as a party in your honor and just a last get together with your friends before you are married. Now if younwere trying to plan your own shower i think that would be different. But if they are interested in planning for you, get them involved and let them! It should be a relaxful time for you, don't stress if you don't have to.

Since planning my wedding I've used it as a preparation course for real married life. My anxiety kept me from feeling comfortable at events I didn't know about, I didn't trust anyone to do things like I could. Overall, my anxiety was keeping me from seeing how much everyone cared for me. So my BMs and MOH planned the bachelorette party and bridal shower without little input from me. I have never felt more loved by everyone in my life. They asked me questions about what I liked, and what I wanted, but ultimately I didn't have to plan another event. Even if you don't feel comfortable, maybe it's important to practice letting go of control. Life won't go as you plan, it will surprise you, you won't feel comfortable, but you can learn to live in the moment and be thankful for what people do for you and enjoy the good.