Bitter Bridesmaid

Continued...

I even told her that she has an attitude and she denies it! Anyone else experiencing this? How did you handle it? I dont want our friendship to be ruined after the wedding! P.S.- FH does not like her at all!

1- bridesmaids don't need to hve interest in your wedding. nobody cares as much about your wedding as you

2- bridesmaids don't have to throw a bridal shower. maybe there are other issues, like money, or maybe she does feel the MOH should be doing more with it

3- why don't you stop her when she starts bitching about the MOH? But i thought she wasn't talking about the shower? So 2 and 3 are contradictory.

You can only control your happiness. If this friend wants to be miserable, maybe you need to reevaluate your friendship and it's not as good as you thought. Don't let her negative energy impact yours, and just focus on things YOU can control.

First off. I hope you arent asking her to participate in those things. All she should have to do is get a dress and show up on the wedding day.

Second, She'll get over it if shes as close to you as she claims. I can see her being slightly hurt but its your decision and you ont need to justify it to anyone.

Third, Good Luck! :o)

4. Her having an attitude is a matter of opinion. So your opinion she does, hers is that she doesn't, not much you can do.

If I were you, I would limit talking about the wedding. Just say that it's taking up too much of your time and you want just to talk about other things, things that are going on in her life, etc..

Have you talked with her about how this is making you feel? If she is that close to you she should understand as long as you let her know. Sorry she is being so bitter :/

If you let your wedding come before friendships, they will be ruined. Your whole post is quite confusing to me so I have no advice.

Have you validated her feelings at all to her face? Do you talk about BF#1 with her so she thought your relationship was stronger? Is so I understand why she is upset. Did you validate her feelings? Doesn't matter if your FH hates her, she isn't his friend. I can't stand FW's friends but don't get in the middle of their "disagreements" ~ Talk to her again without the accusation of "You have a bad attitude" in her mind her really good friend just crushed her feelings and is now flaunting it in front of her face.

The girls all wanted to throw me a shower, even her, but when the time came for them to meet and discuss, she sat there with her arms folded and had no input. OK I get it, and that's fine, but then she comes back and tells me things that were discussed that she didn't agree with. Shouldn't she be telling them that and not me! I have no intention of ruining our friendship over this, but her attitude is making everyone else not want to even include her in things, and I dont want her to feel left out but shes the one making the problems.

I think you might be overreacting a little bit. Sounds like BF#2 isn't handling the situation in as mature of a fashion as she should, but I can also understand that her feelings were probably hurt. No one will care about your wedding as much as you do--even your best friends. I would just tell her that you don't want to know the details of the shower and if she has opinions or suggestions then her and BF#1 should discuss that on their own.

Janae- After last post. She is an immature brat. She needs t get over it. You don't fight over friends being closer than other friends. It is what it is..

And Yes Nikkell402 we discussed the situation over and over and I told her how much she meant to me and that she is still an important part of my day. I thought we cleared the air, but she is being very bitchy to the MOH and the rest of the girls. So now I have 7 girls calling and saying how rude and cocky she is to them. I do not know how to handle this situation without it getting out of hand.

Where #1 and #2 friends prior to this?/

Yes they are friends, just not as close as they use to be, mainly because #2 is a bitch LOL I am more concerned about her pissing off the other 6 girls. #1 knows how to handle her brat like ways. The rest of the girls cant believe how immature she is behaving and neither can I. I don't want to have to worry about fights breaking out on the big day.

Hmmmmm...........are you alright with the outcome if you tell her that she won't be in the wedding if her attitude doesn't change? Is that an option you would consider?

ETA: Fixed my wording

As far as the shower goes, money isnt the issue, my mom is paying for it, they are just planning it. She didnt even want to attend the BM meeting they held. This is someone who is suppose to be my best friend, and she is making everything about her. I am trying not to let her bother me, but just the fact that she's causing me problems is making me question how much she actually cares about me as a friend. I would never do this to her and no matter what she wants or needs from me I am always there. Is it wrong that I just want her to play nice for me?

No I wouldnt be able to do that. I know its so hard that why I am struggling.

If you were my best friend, I would probably not be saying things like she "is a bitch LOL" and describing your "brat like ways" on an internet forum and expect to stay friends. If that's how you feel about her, why is she even in your bridal party?

^^Ditto, You don't need to get pulled into the drama around the shower. If they choose to throw one for you they should be planning it and you just show up day of and enjoy the honor. You don't need to stress yourself about how she behaved during a planning meeting. Honestly that sounds like drama, like the other BMs are talking to you about her. You need to put boundaries up with your friends and with yourself to keep out of any drama. No discussing one friend with the other friend. I also agree with the advice to nurture this relationship and avoid discussing the wedding too frequently. Weddings can bring some tricky feels out in people especially if they are single.

There you go...........send her this link and see what happens

So when they want to complain about her I just need to tell them I don't want to hear it. and same with her I guess.

I call her a brat and bitch to her face and vice versa. No hard feelings its the truth and we know it.

So it sounds like maybe I just need to sit her down again and let her vent, and then tell her to put it to bed? All the girls are actually enjoying what they are doing and trying to have fun while doing it. I am afraid theyre gonna get fed up with her and just not include her. Then I will have to hear about that! How they stopped including her. Its my shower I'm not even suppose to know about it!

And YES! There is alot of drama, and I am not the one for it. How do I distance myself from it all without seeming like I don't care!