Bachelorette Party Invite 6 Months In Advance???

That is ridiculous.

Six months in advance is when you send an STD--not when you do an invitation, and certainly not for a relatively informal event, but even if it were a wedding it would be INCREDIBLY early.

If I were you, I would probably just RSVP "no," and I bet a lot of people are going to do just that. I think the bride-to-be is going to be unpleasantly surprised by the low turn-out that you get when you send out invitations too early. Most people just can't commit to a bachelorette party that far in advance, and a lot of people, recognizing that they don't know, will just say no.

Ridiculous AS HELL !!! 6mos??!! WOW!! Its not a wedding... and that would even just be a Save the Date. Give me a break!

Wow... My girls and I have discussed what weekend my bachelorette party is- but only because so many of us are getting married this summer. We actually got together with our calendars, put everyone's wedding down and planned tenative parties/showers- but mainly as a courtesy so that we don't overlap each other!

Invites will go out about 2-3 weeks before the respective events...

I'd politely decline the invite, saying you cannot plan that far in advance and you are sorry you will have to miss it because you can't plan that far ahead. You hope they have fun!

Or just not respond? I don't know, if you aren't really close friends with that person...but yeah, if you feel like you need to reply, just politely decline. We're having my bachelorette party two months before my wedding for various reasons, one of the reasons why is people that live out of town, we'll probably send out those invites 6 weeks before but that's because they live far away and I want to give them the opportunity to make arrangements if they want to.

Well I think if it's a weekend getaway, then maybe she should give you advance notice. I know it's in your hometown, but there could be hotel costs involved. I would simply decline. I'm sure they invited you to be polite, and since you aren't inviting them to your wedding, I don't think it's a big deal.

Wow.....6 months? uhm...yeah.....sounds like the bride is hot-to-trot for people to start smothering her with gifts.

I can totally understand wanting to plan a "little" ahead of theg ame if its a destination b-party.....but asking you that far in advance is totally unreasonable! Did she send our her wedding invite last year? :-)

Thanks for the support and advice ladies! Weekend long b-parties have become the norm with this group, mostly because none of them grew up here so most of the attendees are traveling for it.

Also, the bride didn't send the invite, but I'm sure she knew it was going out. I can see if she wanted to send it to her closest friends, or those traveling, but it was sent to everyone.

After reading your responses, I will reply to the bride and the sender that I am very excited for this wedding and to get to know everyone (most of them I don't know), but I can't commit to the weekend this far in advance, please let me know the details as they become available and I will make it to as much as possible.

Thanks again! I love your common sense!

It depends on the situation. All of my friends are spread out across the states. My sister is planning my party and I have invited my closest friends. She did send an email out last week for my bachelorette party weekend that will be in June to see who would be able to attend since it will require travel which requires money. My sister wanted to give everyone a heads up as much as possible rather than last minute as far as dates. This way the idea is out there and if they want to come they can start making plans to attend . Official invites will go out in May. If it were me I would want to know ahead of time, because I like to plan ahead.Not an official invite though! But if you are not close friends I would say be honest and let her know that you will not be able to attend because your best friend is getting married and you need to be avialable for whatever she may need you to do for her wedding. Or justd decline, you don't owe an explanation.

I'm having my bachellorette/lingerie shower in 3 weeks, and I'm JUST NOW sending my MOH the list of people I want invited, let alone... she just started planning TODAY. LOL

To your friend: Can you say "control freak"?!

When did advanced notice turn into rude? I have to disagree with a lot of these comments. Most everyone I know does a weekend event, i.e. Palm Springs or Vegas. Personally, I would like to know what weekend is will be so I don't plan something else or have time to save up, if necessary. Six months is a little far, but maybe everyone planning is just excited and wants the best turn out for their friend. I am a planner, so a few weeks in advance isn't usually enough notice for a full weekend. Plus, I bet a lot of her friends have been asking when they are planning it for so they can reserve the date. The only strange part is that you aren't really close with her. Everyone is different, but it seems like you just don't want to go b/c you don't really know her. No problem in saying no and letting it be.

I don't think it's rude to ask you early, I feel it's rude to ask last minute or not respond. I really don't understand why people can't commit to things ahead of time anymore.

Sharonte', thanks for giving your personal experience and rationale. I don't know many of the attendees, so I'm sure many of them have to travel.

I guess I'm showing my personal preference that people should only invite their best and closest friends to the b-party and have a really fun and special time, it isn't about quantity of people, but quality of experience. And this is coming off as quantity.

I think if you're uncomfortable you should decline and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm with rock-n-roll-bride, I actually prefer advanced notice. My friends plan trips all the time and while 6 months is a little long we usually give a good few months notice so we can set aside money, plans, etc.

Thanks Rock-n-roll and Fins for the other perspective. That is why I posted, to ensure I wasn't just being a PMSing cranky pants (which maybe I am). I took it as "plan your life around my wedding" because 6 months is so long and they are requiring a response before they even plan what they are doing.

Uhm. My wedding is in 8 months and I don't even have any invites ready to be printed much less ready to be mailed. Goodness gracious. I would reply by saying I am not sure what I am doing next week much less then what I will be doing in 6 months. Put me down for a maybe!

If you're going to be spending a lot of money & traveling more than a short distance, a several month notice should be given. If you're having your b-party locally and no one is coming from another state, then several weeks notice would suffice.

I wanted my Bach party to be a weekend long event. Things happened and we decided to go out locally instead of out of town. So it was an over night stay at a hotel. But, really 6months to way too far in advanced notice.

Wowzers ... I think I sense a bridezilla ... LOL no not any of you that girl who already sent out her bacheloretee party invites! My wedding is a little under 9 months away and I am just NOW designing my stationary ... My STDs are yet to go out (but that's okay, the wedding is back in my hometown, where most of the family lives and my parents have mentioned it) ...

I certainly wouldn't advocate not responding--it's always rude to ignore an invitation.

However, as I said, I think that six months is a ridiculously long way out to be asking for an RSVP. If it were an STD type thing, letting people know so that they could start making plans, that would be one thing, but telling people you want an answer about whether they're coming six months before it happens is, imo, excessive.

@rock-n-roll: I don't think giving serious advance notice is a bad thing- especially for a weekend long event that will require travel. I do however think that sending the OFFICIAL invite this far is advance is pushing it a bit. An email with some tenative details, or even an E-vite, stating the formal invitation to follow would be appropriate. But I doubt anyone will still have the formal invites 6 months from now for the official event.

Thank you all for your words of wisdom! They were greatly appreciated and I realized that I was just being a cranky pants. I responded first thing this morning that July is super busy for me and specified why (2 other weddings that month, one being out of the country with the date not yet determined). Her response was that she understood, but I am to tell her as soon as I am 100% sure either way.

I get that she wants to plan, and that she isn't the bride, so I'm not letting it tarnish my views of the bride.

Thanks again!