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Lorilla
Dedicated March 2018

Babysitter on site of wedding

Lorilla, on November 4, 2017 at 10:14 PM Posted in Planning 0 45

My brother just informed me that my niece and nephew are coming to the wedding. I am very excited they are all coming because I originally wanted them to be the ring bearer and flower girl. When I initially asked my brother told me know because my niece has diasabilies and many health issue which I understand. But after he told me know I asked two friends if their children would be the flower girl and ring bearer. Now I am trying to figure out if I should hire a babysitter to have on site to take care of both flowergirls and ring bearers? And if we do decide to hiring one, how do we go about it? We need someone who knows about my nieces health issues and disabilities.

45 Comments

  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    I am going to have a lot of kids at my wedding and am going to ask someone who is already a guest to be the person to watch them. idk if that would work for you since you need someone who knows about your nieces disabilities. you could do a job posting on care.com

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  • R
    Savvy January 2018
    Rachel ·
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    We are setting up a kids area. With a table, crayons, coloring books, craft stuff, and a few toys.

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  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
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    Rather than take this on yourself, I would ask your brother about the needs of his children.

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  • muriel
    Champion June 2018
    muriel ·
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    @Melissa- why on earth would you think it is appropriate to ask a guest to be a babysitter? Parents who bring children to a wedding should look after their own children.

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  • 033118
    Super March 2018
    033118 ·
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    Don't be like Melissa Daphne.

    We are having a sitter attend the ceremony and dinner. Then take the kids to the family vacation rental for the rest of the evening.

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    Jeez i am going to pick someone who likes kids and would like to spend the reception with them

    to the poster maybe you can ask ur brother if they have a normal babysitter that wouldnt mind coming to the wedding

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    I wouldnt be offended if someone asked me to watch kids at a wedding

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  • IdahoBride
    Devoted July 2018
    IdahoBride ·
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    Told you "no" not know. Know is for knowledge, you "know" information. No is the opposite of yes.

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  • Stephanie
    Super March 2018
    Stephanie ·
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    Yeah hiring someone is fine, asking a guest to have that responsibility when they were planning on attending and celebrating? I would feel uncomfortable with that. That puts them on the spot and makes the person feel bad for saying no, even if they are known for liking kids.

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  • Chello
    Savvy June 2018
    Chello ·
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    Do not take Melissa’s advice.

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  • Meg
    Expert September 2018
    Meg ·
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    I would be mad if I was a guest and you asked, but for my SILs sister's wedding, I stayed at the hotel and babysat a bunch of their kids (including my niece and nephew). I didn't feel bad because I know the family, but would never expect to be invited to the wedding. They felt comfortable because they know me.. win win win.

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  • Giselle
    Dedicated February 2019
    Giselle ·
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    My brother (8) and FH's nephew (4) are the only kids invited but my mom is hiring her usual babysitter to come after dinner and take care of the kids. The venue is at a hotel and my mom is planning on booking a room for the kids to hangout in and then probably let the baby sitter spend the night if it's too late or whatever. His brother and my mom are splitting the cost of the babysitter.

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    I didnt tell the op to do what im doing i suggested that she use the normal sitter i am doing what works for me

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    I will need atleast 2 to watch the kids but i will ask them before the wedding to see if they are ok with it. if everyone brings their kids it will be about 20-25 kids

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  • Del
    Master November 2017
    Del ·
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    If you ask someone to watch the kids during your wedding, they will feel obligated to do so because the bride is asking them for a favor. They will grit their teeth and be miserable, but they will do it and it will suck for them. Don't put them in that place.

    I'm a teacher and a parent. I love kids. I don't want to babysit a bunch of children all evening while everyone else drinks and dances.

    Also, what's the plan if your babysitter-guest gets sick and can't make the wedding? If you hire a vetted pro from an agency they send another vetted pro in her place. If one of your two guest sitters gets sick, then you have one person committed to essentially teaching preschool alone all night?

    Do you expect the guest-sitters to be responsible for making sure 25 kids eat their meals? Get cake? Are safe at all times in a room full of drinking, dancing adults and sharp edges? Do their responsibilities including removing any children who are crying, which would leave one person in charge of a huge group again. What if someone has an allergy and needs an epi-pen administered? What is someone gets hurt? This is not watching your siblings while your mom runs to the shop. Managing 20-25 kids all night is a huge responsibility best left to pros.

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    Thats true i dont want someone to have to do it alone maybe i can ask people not invited to come and be the sitters. everyone i invited is really close with eachother i know that no one would have minded

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  • FutureMrs.L
    Master September 2018
    FutureMrs.L ·
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    I’m a mom and I love kids, however I would be hella pissed if I was asked to babysit. I sure as hell am not watching 20-25. You’d need at least 3-5 babysitters. FFS, don’t invite people just to be babysitters, that’s so rude.

    OP, talk to your brother about what he’d prefer. Smiley smile

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes May 2018
    Melissa ·
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    Everyone i invited knows eachother and is really close to eachother so i dont think anyone will mind watching the kids. i would like to hire real babysitters but idk if i can fit it in the budget

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  • FutureMrs.L
    Master September 2018
    FutureMrs.L ·
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    Melissa, I thought that too. You know what happened? My friends told me they’re not bringing their kids, they want an adult night out.....As much as I love and adore my friends and their kids, I’m not babysitting at my wedding, and I don’t want them to do it either.

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  • Del
    Master November 2017
    Del ·
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    You don't need to have a sitter at all, if you can't afford to pay one. It's perfectly fine for parents to be responsible for their own children. Honestly, if my FH or I am in the room, there's no way my son is staying with a sitter at a different table all night anyway. He will repeatedly run across everything to get to us, because we are his parents and that's what little kids do. And if I bring him to an event, I expect to be responsible for him anyway.

    If you can afford professional sitters in a separate room, that's a nice thing to have on optional offer. If not, parents can watch their own children. If you think they won't manage their children in a way that's suitable for a wedding, just invite adults only.

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