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Just Said Yes August 2017

Avoiding the Cliche

Rachelle, on November 5, 2015 at 2:38 AM Posted in Planning 0 70
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When planing my wedding I am very adamant about NOT making it the same as every other wedding that people have been to. In the weddings that you have attended, what do you find to be overused or tacky? What did someone do that really stuck with you or was a great idea?

70 Comments

  • Sunni
    VIP May 2016
    Sunni ·
    • Flag

    Everything. Weddings aren't unique and, to be honest, it's silly when folks go out of their way to make it so. Focus more on what you/FH want. This doesn't directly answer your question but...FH and I hate how stiff, formal, and overly orchestrated weddings seem to be so we took out all the 'show' elements (all the standard wedding events except the marrying part and eating and drinking). No bridal party, toasts, grand entrances, or parent dances. Most importantly, no randoms. We feel weddings typically have too many guests the couple isn't close to, which probably adds to the stiffness and formality I just mentioned.

    Edited: to correct typos

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  • Shelby
    Super December 2016
    Shelby ·
    • Flag

    I agree with Sunni! I have received wedding invitations for people I haven't spoken with in ages/hardly know and I always feel like it is a gift grab. We are only having 100 people at most though probably closer to 60 total since it's kind of a DW. My FH family are from the Midwest and mine is from the West Coast so we decided to meet in the middle. While I would love if all 100 that we are close to come, I am also realistic with the thought that not everyone can take time off work or afford the travel.

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  • Shelby
    Super December 2016
    Shelby ·
    • Flag

    Also, my FH is in a wedding next June where instead of the bride walking down the aisle to the wedding march, it's the groom and the bride wants to be the one standing at the alter waiting! She is very self conscious and doesn't want all of the attention on her so decided she would do that instead!

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  • Sunni
    VIP May 2016
    Sunni ·
    • Flag

    @Shelby, that's awesome!! And it makes me think...many of my wedding decisions were motivated by my desire to avoid the spotlight...as much as that's possible on one's wedding day!!!

    • Reply
  • Celia Milton
    June 2020
    Celia Milton ·
    • Flag

    There is nothing cliche about the union between two people, just as there really is nothing truly unique......everything has been done before, but who cares? Traditions exist for a reason; they are comforting, reliable, and when used correctly, joyful.

    Invite people you truly care about. Include rituals you like and that speak to you (one of my couples did a Fireball toast to the guests last week...it's a real part of their camaraderie with their friends and family). Think about every aspect and decide if each aspect has meaning for you (or your families).

    But dont' be different just to be different. That's the truly tacky thing.

    • Reply
  • Caroline
    Master June 2016
    Caroline ·
    • Flag

    I agree with Celia. Sometimes people try SO hard to make their wedding unique just so they can say it's unique, not because it truly represents them. I think if there's certain personal touches that mean a lot to you both, then including them will make your wedding reflect your personality. But you don't have to go against every traditional aspect of a wedding just for the sake of being nontraditional.

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  • MrsPettit
    Super May 2016
    MrsPettit ·
    • Flag

    Just try to make the wedding yours. There's no one exactly like you. Chances are someone who has been to, or looked at lots of weddings might find some similarities -- but they've never been to YOUR wedding before.

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  • R
    Just Said Yes August 2017
    Rachelle ·
    • Flag

    Thanks everyone! I think I was more asking about what the things were you found overused/tacky or a great idea! I of course know that hundreds of thousands of North American weddings occur every year and that mine cannot be 100% unique, just looking to outsource general opinions and to avoid annoying trends.

    • Reply
  • Nancy Taussig
    June 2020
    Nancy Taussig ·
    • Flag

    Rachelle, you're two days late -- Tues. was national cliche day!

    If you want to avoid current trends, get off WW. Just look at how many of these brides are using the same colors, wearing the same dresses, using the same/similar venues, even asking the same questions!

    • Reply
  • Staci
    Master September 2014
    Staci ·
    • Flag

    Things you can find on Pinterest. "Pick a seat not a side" signs for example.

    But, I won't say any more than that lest I offend ladies who are using those Pinterest things lol.

    • Reply
  • OriginalRandi
    Master November 2015
    OriginalRandi ·
    • Flag

    100% with O&S here. Nancy...what?

    Rachelle, you are you and your FH is your FH. That's what's most unique about your wedding. Smiley smile Just host your guests well, make it as beautiful as you please, and let your personalities resonate in the choices you make leading up to the wedding. IMO that's the best way to be unique about a wedding.

    Try too hard to be UNIQUE for the sake of uniqueness, and you end up with the engagement ring made out of a wisdom tooth we were all discussing yesterday. Ugh, gross.

    • Reply
  • JadedRaven
    VIP September 2016
    JadedRaven ·
    • Flag

    Rachelle, I think the harder you try to make it "unique" the "tackier" it gets. Honestly, I hate both of those words, I find those WORDS overused when it comes to weddings. And I'm guilty of using them myself. We all try so hard to standout. But just remember your guests are there for YOUR wedding.

    Just host an event that represents you and your SO in someway while being gracious to your guests and everyone will be happy. All weddings wind up similar, but all have touches that make them special, regardless of how hard you do or do not try.

    ETA: Nancy T. clearly has a porcupine up her ass today.

    • Reply
  • Lauren B.
    Master October 2015
    Lauren B. ·
    • Flag

    Someone a little salty today?

    • Reply
  • LoveBubbles
    Super March 2016
    LoveBubbles ·
    • Flag

    To be honest what I find overused is the "extras". Tons of signage, hashtags, photobooths, extravagant favors, signature drinks, decor that costs more than the food, bridal party dances, excessive speeches, etc. These are all things that if you didn't do them you would still have a great wedding that is meaningful and special to you and your partner. Just to put this out there, there is nothing wrong with these "extras" what so ever I am just giving my personal opinion of what I view as overused.

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  • Jersey
    Master November 2016
    Jersey ·
    • Flag

    What? Honestly, I find WW to be a much larger pool of diversity than my small sampling of NJ/NY weddings.

    I think many of the BAMs on here are things I haven't seen. And of course there are going to be similarities, but to say that you should get off WW to avoid cliche is completely inaccurate in my eyes.

    • Reply
  • M
    Master July 2015
    m ·
    • Flag

    I get this, but in an odd way.

    Of course everything has been done at one point or another. However, I think there are certain points where things become tired, and it's obvious that people aren't doing it because they actually like XYZ, be in the music, the decor, the food... but doing it because that's what's trendy.

    The odd part/flipside, is that if a person does something that you may consider to be totally and utterly cliche, they probably did it not for the trend, but because they genuinely like something.

    It's all relative. For me, the song Shout was all kinds of off limits at our wedding. I hate it. People think it's a good party song but it's really, really not. It annoys the shit out of me, and I personally feel it's cliche. SIL ended her wedding on that song..... I thought it was cliche, but she was having a GREAT time. Her whole wedding was cliche to me.... but that's HER taste. So, in actuality, nothing cliche about that.

    I'm not editing this and hoping it makes sense. *fingers crossed*

    • Reply
  • Patricia
    VIP September 2016
    Patricia ·
    • Flag

    I agree. The more "unique" you try to be the tackier. My boss was showing me pictures of her brothers wedding and they had one cake with a football on top and the football team blanket as a banner. Unique yes, tacky absolutely. and the color theme was of the football team. All of this on at a beach venue. ahah.

    • Reply
  • EatKnitRun
    Master May 2016
    EatKnitRun ·
    • Flag

    There isn't much about weddings that is truly unique. They are by nature conventional. I think it's more important for elements of your wedding to mean something to you, not for them to be different.

    Personally, I don't care the least if anyone thinks the wedding I am planning is the same as thousands of others. My fiance and I have made choices that make us happy, and many of them were made for personal reasons, not because they are popular. If they also happen to be popular, fine. Newsflash: lots of people like pink and peonies. That doesn't mean that my favorite color and flower will be absent from my wedding.

    • Reply
  • Caroline
    Master June 2016
    Caroline ·
    • Flag

    There is so much diversity on here. You have brides with $3000 budgets and brides with $50,000 budgets. Brides doing destination weddings and brides doing backyard weddings. Traditional ballgowns and wedding dresses that are every colour of the rainbow. Everything from good old-fashioned BBQ to full vegan or vegetarian weddings.

    I really disagree with your sentiment, Nancy.

    • Reply
  • OG FMP
    Master August 2015
    OG FMP ·
    • Flag

    Nancy T obviously doesn't look at BAMs or the dress-porn threads. We are all so different.

    • Reply

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