Assign duties to wedding party?

My goal is to assign very little, if anything to the bridal party.

All of my bridesmaids have offered to help with whatever multiple times already, even though all but one lives 3-8 hrs away. So if I get to a point where I need help, you can bet I'll take them up on it. As of now, it'll hopefully just be trying on and purchasing their dresses and showing up the Friday before for a rehearsal.

And that's just my choice, it's not because it's on a list. Some check lists also have "engagement party" and "videographer" on them, both things my FH and I didn't want.

From what I've noticed people offer to help don't see it as a job. That might not always be the case, but I don't see a problem with asking for a little help.

Hopefully that helps clarify things for you!

Here are the duties you should assign:

1. Date dress/attire needs to be ordered on

2. Color/style preference on shoes

Tada

LOL at everyone believing that their guests are excited to work their wedding.

Basically assigning duties is just finding someone to take care of the little details. Whether its a sister or Bestfriend or a BM. If you are having the reception somewhere else you might need someone to move the guestbook to the new location. You might want to ask someone you trust to take the presents to your house. I've been to a lot of weddings and the bridal party should be your closest friends and should want to help. Look up the bridal party duties on pintrest. There are a lot of ideas. And you can even say you got it offline and that IT IS COMMON for the bridal party to help out a little. AND they should want to!

I am not sure what duties you want to delegate but it is the general consensus on here to delegate tasks to the professionals that you are paying. If they offer their help in doing things that is a different ball game. I would not ask my MOH for example to cut my wedding cake for me.

As a bridesmaid, i have gladly helped with smaller tasks that helped the wedding day run more smoothly (for example, corralling people for photos, being responsible for the marriage license, or being responsible for the bride's purse/makeup/etc making it from the ceremony to reception).

however, a bridesmaid is NOT responsible for helping with wedding planning, DIY projects, making centerpieces, helping set up or break down the space, or making/serving food. that is way beyond what is expected of them.

Hi Chanelle! Everything on the WeddingWire checklist is a suggestion and an overall planning guide. You do not have to do everything on the checklist, and everyone's wedding will be a little different!! You can edit the checklist to remove items that don't apply to you, or you can change due dates to better reflect your planning timeline.

The point that I think a lot of forum users are trying to make here is that your bridal party are your friends and not your employees! If they offer to help with planning, that's awesome! If they don't, that's ok too - they have lives

Also to defend the "assign wedding party duties" item - that can mean a lot of different things We have an old "maid of honor checklist" that lists out the maid of honor's responsibilities, including: help keep the bride cool calm and collected, arrange the bride's train and veil upon her arrival to the altar, hold the bride's bouquet during the exchange of vows, sign the marriage license as a witness, etc. These are all super easy things that your maid of honor or a bridesmaid can do that are helpful on the wedding day!

"Duties" is a term that can be interpreted super widely (obviously), and I believe the takeaway is that yes there are some wedding party traditions, but you should never be treating your wedding party like employees

As a follow up from WW, here's a different spin - 11 Things Your Bridesmaids Don't Want to Hear

Ella said that way better than I did!!

Asking for help with projects is one thing. Actually assigning duties is another.

Nooooo - Don't assign any duties. WW puts on WW what they are paid to put up - that includes bad and outdated ideas

Only my MOH has duties. Keep me sane, keep my FMIL away and if my mom gets on my nerves, keep her away and carve fake pumpkins (she offered that one). But we've been best friends for 19 years, I was in the delivery room for the birth of 2 of her children, so I can give her duties, No one else. Everyone else, shower, be on time in the dress or tux and stand and smile.

Where I was from- north young south when I married....No one assigned duties in the "old days" lmao- I was married 25 years ago- no duties assigned- sisters married in the 80s not one duty- cousin married when I was a kid in the 70s- I asked her no duties- in the 60s my parents were married - no duties- so unless we're talking about who is holding the rings (don't entrust to ring bearer- anything a rb has should be fake)

Prior to the 60s weddings tended to be cake and punch affairs- just sayin'

OP, like you said it's YOUR wedding. If you have specific things you would like your bridesmaids to do then ask them. If they say no, move on. I can't with the argument that their only duty is to show up and wear the dress. Bridesmaids are more than that. Hopefully they are your friends first and will want to help.

I can't think of a single thing I would have asked my MOH to do.

I did ask the BM to keep DH sober until after speeches.

Here's the real deal. If people SO CHOOSE to do something, and they WANT to do something, and it involves NO RISK to anybody's health or safety, then let them. Not everyone wants to "just enjoy the day" as people put it, sometimes people want to be helpful by helping set up or clean up. It truly does not matter if someone wants "duties" as long as it's willing.

"I was in the delivery room for the birth of 2 of her children, so I can give her duties, No one else."

LOL, I'm crying. How are those two things correlated?

Are you really convinced you need to give your guest of honors assigned duties?

No. This is not how you wedding.

"Assigning duties" and "asking for help" are two different things. Generally when someone agrees to be in a bridal party, they are open to helping you do things the day of or along the way.

For me that means being a sounding board for ideas, and just being supportive FRIENDS.

BUT at no point should they feel obligated or feel like its a job. At that point it's not fun for anyone.

We don't work for WeddingWire.

In the "old days", the duty of the bridesmaids was to dress exactly like the bride so as to confuse demons, with the idea that they wouldn't be sure which woman to curse or infect. If you're adhering to "old days" traditions, I hope you're buying each of them a wedding gown!

Lol I love you Delfina! <3 assign duties:

1. Wear identical wedding dress and veils

2. Distract any demons you see wonder in