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Beginner December 2019

Anyone have a different name for “bride’s personal attendant”?

Bailee, on February 12, 2019 at 5:04 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 1 54

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I have two friends that are my personal attendants but I hate that name... anyone have an idea of something else I can call them on wedding programs & such?

*ive seen a lot of incredibly rude comments about personal attendants - I just want to make it known that these are two girls I have been close with for a long time but we have gone separate ways/moved away/etc so we are not as close as we used to be (my bridesmaids are mostly family) but i still want them to be involved. They agree with this decision as well as they don’t live as close & one of them is a single mom so she likes being involved but having less responsibility.

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Latest activity by Olivia, on April 1, 2023 at 9:44 PM

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Mim · on February 12, 2019 at 5:08 PM
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I curious why you would ask a community that sees personal attendants as really rude for a different name?

Just call them friends and treat them as VIPs, maybe ask them to do a reading or simply give them some flowers and a hug.
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Champion October 2018
Kelly · on February 12, 2019 at 5:12 PM
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I’m not exactly sure what a personal attendant is but in the south it’s common to have a house party which is a group of girls that are a step below bridesmaids. They usually hand our programs, manage the guestbook, etc.
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Beginner December 2019
Bailee · on February 12, 2019 at 5:13 PM
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I asked because I figured there’d be a person or two that, instead of being judgey and rude, could just help a girl out.
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VIP September 2019
Brae · on February 12, 2019 at 5:21 PM
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I've never heard of this. What's a personal attendant?
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VIP April 2018
JustKidding · on February 12, 2019 at 5:22 PM
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I'm just going to agree with all of this.
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Mim · on February 12, 2019 at 5:25 PM
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It's someone you don't want to honor as a bridesmaid but instead ask them to do chores on the wedding day that should be the responsibility of the host, venue coordinator, or paid day of coordinator. It's supposed to be an honor, I fail to see how it is.
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Beginner December 2019
Bailee · on February 12, 2019 at 5:28 PM
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They aren’t being asked to do anything.. hence the reason I am trying to find a different day. They are wearing a nice dress, hanging out in the dressing room with us and sitting at the head table, drinking for free... I fail to see how that is anything less than an honor. Would you feel the same way about a man being asked to be an usher instead of a groomsman?
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VIP September 2019
Brae · on February 12, 2019 at 5:28 PM
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Interesting. Thank you.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on February 12, 2019 at 5:28 PM
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All of this.
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Mim · on February 12, 2019 at 5:31 PM
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Just call them friends
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VIP September 2019
Brae · on February 12, 2019 at 5:32 PM
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All of those things sound like bridesmaids. I know you are not as close to them as your current bridesmaids, but if you want them involved the same, why not just have them as bridesmaids. Or I would have them do a reading, to make it a little different.
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Super April 2019
Future Mrs. Polar Bear · on February 12, 2019 at 5:41 PM
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Bridal Assistants?
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Savvy March 2021
JENE' · on February 12, 2019 at 7:08 PM
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I don't understand what's the difference between this description and the bridesmaid's description. I also don't understand why you don't just make them bridesmaids.
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Devoted July 2019
Rayna · on February 12, 2019 at 7:23 PM
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I know someone who had a lady in waiting. I thought it was bizarre and borderline rude but I guess the friend didn’t mind 🤷🏽‍♀️
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Beginner December 2019
Bailee · on February 12, 2019 at 7:29 PM
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They don’t live close and completely understood it would be hard for dress shopping/fittings/other wedding plans. One of them is also currently pregnant and has a lot going on. Like I said.. no different than asking a guy to be an usher instead of a groomsman. It nothing they or anyone else in my party thought was rude and something that is quite common in my area. I made this post to ask for other names... that is all.
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Devoted June 2021
Kristin · on February 12, 2019 at 7:41 PM
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Bridal Assistants is the only thing I can think of.
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Dedicated October 2020
Kayla · on February 12, 2019 at 7:51 PM
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I don't understand why everyone is so judgey. I understand the whole still wanting them to be involved but aren't quite close enough to be in the wedding party and I think it's wonderful. you could call them your ladies in waiting, leading ladies or even friends of honor!
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Dedicated May 2020
Colleen · on February 12, 2019 at 7:59 PM
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I’ve never heard of such a thing! I would make them bridesmaids and leave it at that. If you have more girls than groomsmen it’ll all work out. I also don’t agree with ushers, the idea seems so outdated. If you care about someone and want them to stand with you call her a bridesmaid, if you care about someone but not enough for a bridesmaid spit, she is a guest at your wedding.
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Devoted October 2019
Lauren · on February 12, 2019 at 8:06 PM
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Call them something like your lady squad. Or squad goals or whatever people call their faux entourage. A squad. Bride squad.
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Dedicated April 2019
Shelby · on February 12, 2019 at 9:10 PM
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I like Lauren’s suggestion of bride squad and Kristen’s idea bridal assistant.
I don’t think it rude it doesn’t sound like your being a diva or something INFACF it’s nice that you want a better name than “attendant” and that you want to include their names on the program.
my best friend had a “mistress of ceremony” who helped coordinate timing and the ceremony.
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Anyone have a different name for “bride’s personal attendant”?

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