After destination wedding reception

I'm adding a couple of other things. How do I tell FH that (if this is truly etiquette) that we have to do this? In total only 15 of us will be in LV, so thats where my "who do we invite" question comes from. I am not sure to invite people from work, I know he won't, he doesn't really hang out with any of them. I do want my dad to come and celebrate, what about people who've already been to LV with us? We are hosting a casual dinner after the ceremony, so this is like we're feeding them twice. I don't want a true cake, I'll be happier with cupcakes. I would also want to invite those who couldn't make it out there. Is this all appropriate? Am I obsessing?

Thanks everyone!!

Hi Kristine, welcome to WW!

You really don't have to have a reception at home. You're getting married in Vegas and you're having any celebration you want there.

As far as the home reception goes, it's totally up to you and your FH. If your mom wants to throw it and provide food, I guess you can show up? I don't see why that would make you indebted to her?

It is not mandatory. We will be doing same as you but will not do a at home reception.

My mom offered but I declined and she understood and is payin for the ceremony half of the wedding in Vegas.

My brother did do one. They invited family and friends as I they were having a bigger wedding at home even if they made it to te real wedding but who you invite is up to you. They had a small appetizer buffet and did a cake cutting and toast.

Maybe you can have her change her catering plans to cover brunch instead of dinner - then it's an early day thing (so you can do what you want) and whoever is up for it can stop by her home for a casual recap of your wedding day event. I've seen people do this with a cake/pastries bar - and they served mimosas and punch. It's definitely cheaper than an evening event! You could even plan it for a few weeks later - as a wedding photo review party or present opening event.

If you are worried about offending her, I'd just make sure the party is on your terms.

This isn't mandatory, though. Families can get dramatic around weddings. The important thing to remember is it is your decision, your commitment, your event and your guest list. If it's more drama than it's worth, cancel it, or find a way to morph it into something you and your son-to-be husband can live with.

I'm sorry about all this leading up to your big day! No fun.

At home reception, definitely not mandatory. We are having an "open house" at my parents house a few weeks after the wedding for those that can't make it to our destination wedding and even those that did make it to the wedding if they would like to attend. We will send the invitation as part of our wedding announcement. This would be an event where family/friends get to meet your new spouse and we will have wedding pictures on a slideshow for people to watch. We will most likely have appetizers or deli trays and cupcakes for people to eat. Very casual, affordable, and gives everyone a chance to celebrate your special day.

I am having a DW in Hawaii and not doing an at home reception =) My FH does not want one so I am honoring his wishes. You could respectfully decline the offer and have dinner with dad and stepmom upon your return =)

Hi Kristine! We are a little chapel in Niagara Falls and work with many couples who are describing exactly what your delimna is !

From our experiance, having heard from many brides, here is a suggesion:

- At your ceremony, have a professional photographer and videographer. You can then showcase the photos and present the video at the reception. This way everyone can feel they are a part of the experiance without having to be there. The "reception" at home later can be any type of event, We've known couples to attend a lunch, or dinner, finger food, casual, home based, or a rented hall, restaurant, dancing or not.....any type of gathering is just a celebration of your happiness. People feel that they wish to congratulate you in person, offer a gift perhaps, and share your excitement.If you feel stressed about the event, just tell your mom to surprise you and advise when and where to show up and what to wear. You arrive and enjoy with an open heart-no stress leading up to it!

Thank you everyone for your input. I decided to do the reception after all, but asked to do it in spring instead. This gives us more time to plan and not spend more money just before Christmas. She's fine with that. I did plan on having photos and the wedding dvd played, if we rent our apt complex clubhouse they have a full kitchen, lots of seating and a large screen tv with dvd player. Im happy with this decision and one less thing off my plate for now!