40 days, and groomsmen backs out via text, UGH!!!!!!!

I'd take the high road. Let him go, and still give him his gifts with a note that he means a lot to you, you're going to miss his presence, but you'd like him to have his gift because he IS important to you.

What he did wasn't right, but it's also not something that's worth holding on to either. Let him go, and let the situation go.

@Paris, youre absolutely right and I plan to be the bigger person! That being said, Im throwing myself a pity party at the moment, bc now our wedding how we had envisoned it (with 4 BM and 4 GM) wont be happening....and while that isnt a HUGE deal, it still is a bummer!

With 40 days you don't have time to replace him? that's plenty of time to get fitted for a tux or whatever. any nephew or cousin or whatever would help you fill the spot.

Hopefully this is the worst of all your problems, and your wedding will still be BEAUTIFUL even with an uneven number

I agree, it's crappy and I don't understand how people just figure this stuff out. Have a pity party for like 2 days, and then move on and realize your wedding is still going to be AWESOME!

@kysweetheart...we are having a DW in the Dominican so to ask someone isnt like a normal wedding...plus, we have no male cousins, nephews or brothers!

@rachel, thanks

Uneven bridal parties are not unusual. And there will be one very happy groomsman w/a bridesmaid on each arm -- grinning from ear-to-ear!

Maybe he was really trying to do everything he could to attend the wedding and then was embarrassed when he saw that he really couldn't? I really don't think he did it in purpose to ruin your wedding.

Give him his GM gifts and let him know he will be missed but you understand. An uneven bridal party is not a reason to lose a friendship over.

We’re also having an uneven bridal party, I’m sure you can make it work! Maybe have FH Dad stand up with him? FH brother had a last minute drop out and had FFIL stand up as a groomsmen, it wasn’t weird at all. I’m sorry that happened though. I’d be upset too. I would still give him the gift regardless.

You guys are way nicer than I am...I'd be TICKED, and no way would he get a gift for it. If he had called and explained his situation, maybe. But an uninformative "don't hate me" text? Heck no. You deserve more than that, and if it was me, there's no way I'd be rewarding that behavior. I'd be hard-pressed to consider him a friend after that. It's one thing to apologize and explain why he's backing out; it's completely disrespectful and selfish to drop a text on you with no explanation and not even the courtesy of calling you.

Are his gifts personalized, or can they be returned?