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Beginner October 2013

No Save the Dates... when to send invites?

Private User, on May 17, 2012 at 9:51 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 18

We're not sending 'Save the Date' cards out, just the actual invites. Our wedding is the beginning of October 2013 so I have the RSVP date of August 6, 2013. How soon should I send the invites? Is February/March 2013 way too early?


18 Comments

Latest activity by Lisa, on April 1, 2017 at 1:22 PM
  • elle
    Devoted July 2012
    elle ·
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    8 weeks before the wedding

    I sent mine 3 months prior because I didn't send save the dates.... we planned to get engaged in 7 months so it was pointless to send save the dates, yet we wanted eveyone to have extra time to learn about the wedding

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  • Nancy Taussig
    Nancy Taussig ·
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    Will any of your guests need to make travel arrangements or request time off work? IF so, I'd suggest letting them know (STD or a note in a Christmas card) by Dec. 2012 (many employers create vacation schedules at the end of the year for the next year).

    Usually, invitations go out 2-3 months before the wedding, with a RSVP 1 month before the wedding (so you can give a head count to the venue/caterer).

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  • Carrie
    Master December 2011
    Carrie ·
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    I have received invitations 8-10 weeks before the wedding. Usually the RSVP date is about a month before. Why do you need your RSVPs two months before?

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  • Hayley C™
    Master March 2008
    Hayley C™ ·
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    Hi Maria ~ Did you already order your invites? August 6 is WAY too early for an rsvp date. Your RSVP date should be 1 - 2 weeks before your final head count is due to the venue. (So September 1st is the Earliest for an RSVP date)

    and second, it is WAY too early to be ordering invites. So much can change in the next year. I would hate for you to spend all that money on invites and then have something come up in your life where you need to change the date. If you just flip through the first 10 pages of discussions, you will always find 1 post saying "Need to change our date"

    It is a pretty design but the wording is kinda repetitive. I think they know to write their names and you don't need all that wording at the top. Also, do you fear your guests will add to the guest list and bring more than you budgeted for? You should add

    "___ seats have been reserved in your honor"

    Send out your invites 4 - 9 weeks before the wedding. Yes, Feb/Mar is Too early. Order them at that time.

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  • Hayley C™
    Master March 2008
    Hayley C™ ·
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    Also, does your venue need a meal count? Are you serving 2 different plated meals? If so, that needs to be on there too.

    We look forward to celebrating with you.

    Please respond by September 1st

    Name(s)___________________

    __________________________

    We have reserved ___ seats in your honor.

    Yes, we will gladly attend ____

    #____ attending

    Sorry, unable to attend ___

    Good luck ~ Welcome to WW ~ Happy planning

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  • P
    Beginner October 2013
    Private User ·
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    I originally had the RSVP date one month in advance then changed it to two because 1) I've never done this before and 2) I'd rather over-plan than under plan! My designer actually sent me the wrong file at first so I do have the September 6th RSVP file (I paid $40 for custom designed invites and will print them online and make my own pocketfold invites).

    My designer gave me a little love bird graphic that's on the invite design to use for printing pocketfold seals and table cards I'll make on my own, so I wonder if I should make up a Save the Date postcard to send out?

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  • Rae
    Master October 2012
    Rae ·
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    Our wedding is a DW so I wanted numbers 3 months before for planning purposes so we sent ours out in April and are getting them back mid-July as the deadline.

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  • Amy
    Super July 2012
    Amy ·
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    I agree, August is very early for an October wedding. We got engaged and planned to wed the same year, so we didnt do STD cards. But sent out invites in March with an RSVP date of June 15th. Wedding on July 14th. You are still over a year to your wedding so I would wait at least 6 months before starting to plan this stuff.

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  • Amy
    Super July 2012
    Amy ·
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    Most of us havent done this before, but if your worried about rsvps, send out the STD cards in December. Then send out the invites in July?

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  • P
    Beginner October 2013
    Private User ·
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    Hi Hayley,

    I want assigned seating for all parties, so I want the guests to fill out names on the RSVP cards. We're a little nervous about certain family members bringing non-invited guests or children, so I want all of that information up front in case we need to speak to anyone.

    I was browsing RSVP cards designs and first of all I hate the typical "M_______" line that is on generic cards. Also, my fiance's first wedding was a word of mouth, fire hall type wedding, so I'm a tad nervous some of his family members might think this is similar. We're not having a royal wedding of course, but it is at a nice reception hall, fully catered, etc. (i.e. if anyone shows up in jeans, we're going to have one upset bride lol).

    We will have to give the caterer a final head count 2 weeks before but we're doing a buffet so no need for meal choices.

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  • P
    Beginner October 2013
    Private User ·
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    We're having engagement photos done this summer, so I'm thinking it might be a good time to send a Save the Date with those!

    Thanks for everyone's weigh-in!

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  • Hayley C™
    Master March 2008
    Hayley C™ ·
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    You might think it is over planning, however, it will give you more headache in the long run. 2 months is too early to get an accurate head count. People will be changing their answers or not even tell you that something comes up and you will end up paying for more meals than people attending. I had people calling to change their RSVP 3 days before the wedding. Your guests should receive their invites and have 3 - 4 weeks to decide if they can come to the wedding. Any longer than that and they toss it aside and forget about it.

    They think "Oh, this wedding isn't until October, I have time to reply"

    or

    "This wedding isn't until October, I'm not sure what is going on that far in advance, I'll need to hang on to this and find out later if I can go."

    Print them in June (since you own the file - gives you a month to address them)

    Mail them out August 1st

    RSVP of Sept 6

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  • Hayley C™
    Master March 2008
    Hayley C™ ·
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    Well, if you are afraid on non-invited attending, I Highly suggest you add the

    "___ seats have been reserved in your honor" line. That way they know it is only the 2 names on the front of the envelope.

    We look forward to celebrating with you.

    Please reply with those attending by September 1st

    We have reserved ___ seats in your honor.

    ___ Yes, we will gladly attend

    ___ Sorry, unable to attend

    Name(s) of those attending

    __________________________

    __________________________

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  • Christa
    Expert August 2012
    Christa ·
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    We did not send out STDs (just word of mouth-as the majority of our guests are family/friends that we see on a regular basis). However, because we are having a summer wedding we sent the invites out earlier (yesterday, actually-11 weeks before the wedding on 8/4/12). We have requested a reply by 7/13/12.

    I recommend sending the invitiations in mid-June and request a reply in early September.

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  • GBAC :)
    Super August 2012
    GBAC :) ·
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    Im planning on sending mine mid of june with rsvp date of aug 1 for aug 31

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  • akmprvn
    Expert December 2012
    akmprvn ·
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    Mine is a small wedding so I'm not going to send any STDs out either. Just the invites. I'm planning on doing the STD's online for the invitees only.

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  • L
    Just Said Yes October 2013
    Lisa ·
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    All of these comments were helpful for me. Thank you.

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  • L
    Just Said Yes July 2017
    Lisa ·
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    Our wedding is July 8,2017. I decided to not STD cards to cut down on cost. The RSVP is June 19. I hope to have the invitations out by April 17, 2017.

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