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A.Magill.Since.May
Master May 2018

Would it be rude to send wedding announcements to those not invited to a small wedding?

A.Magill.Since.May, on April 21, 2017 at 12:52 PM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 25

My guest list is currently at 130 people, which is actually shaved down immensely from the original aggregated list. My budget isn't cooperating with my guest list very well (it could work if I just don't have flowers or table lenins and DIY h/mu entirely) and want to cut down by quite a bit more....

My guest list is currently at 130 people, which is actually shaved down immensely from the original aggregated list. My budget isn't cooperating with my guest list very well (it could work if I just don't have flowers or table lenins and DIY h/mu entirely) and want to cut down by quite a bit more. My parents, who are helping pay, have a lot of people who they want invited to make sure they feel included even though they don't think they would come. I can't afford to count on that. So I'm brainstorming how to keep people in the social circle without blowing the budget! Would it be rude or perceived as gift grabby to send wedding announcements like "Mr & Mrs Smith are pleased to announce the marriage of their daughter Jane to John Doe, which took place in town on date."

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25 Comments

  • Kd
    Super February 2024
    Kd ·
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    If it's so important to you mother to inform her friends then she can go ahead and write them each a short note telling them about your wedding, including a snap shot, and asking how they are doing.

    Anything formal coming from you guys will just come across as odd & gift grabby.

    Also, none of these people are on social media?? My mom and all her friends are on Facebook.

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  • kirackle
    Super September 2017
    kirackle ·
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    I second only sending announcements afterwards to extended family members if they insist on announcements. Personally, I would skip this and tell your parents to include the information in Christmas cards to these people. Your parents could also call them and bring it up in normal conversation.

    I avoided this by inviting everyone my future inlaws and parents wanted to acknowledge but doubted would be able to come. They offered to cover extra expenses if these more extended friends and family do come. This makes planning a bit difficult because I have 2 separate reception layout plans ranging from 200-300, which will be changed based off of RSVPs. Definitely do not do that unless you can accommodate every single person if it ends up they accept.

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  • ShanynL
    VIP September 2017
    ShanynL ·
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    I wouldn't do that, only send invitations/announcements to those who are invited to your wedding

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  • Erin
    Expert July 2017
    Erin ·
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    I'm from PA and I've never heard of it. I wouldn't do it, but you do you on this one

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  • J. Clo
    Master May 2018
    J. Clo ·
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    I'm sending a post wedding announcement to people who I've known forever (dentist, hygienist, nail salon) but are not coming to my wedding. They will be dying to see the pics before I get in to see them. And I am not storing all them on my phone.

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