Worst wedding stories?

View Quoted Comment I am the same way. All the weddings I have been to have been pretty tame compared to these stories.

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Crazy! is the couple still married or did her MIL chase her off?

View Quoted Comment Yeah we were very upset. I understand budget constraints but please feed your guests and show them a good time. Especially if they are traveling to your wedding.

View Quoted Comment Wow!
The dressing getting stuck has me shocked 😂😂😂😂

The Dress**

View Quoted Comment As far as I know still married!

So terrible because the couple was nice & they had already been dating for 15 YEARS (high school). It’s like, MIL, get over it. He loves her!

Following for the laughs...

but still wy better than mine

I’ve been assisting DJ's all over San Diego with weddings for the last few years in hopes of starting my own business MC/DJing weddings myself. There's one in which I learned an extremely valuable lesson, being a bit of perfectionist. Some weddings, regardless of a herculean effort to make them succeed, will fail due to the guests/bride&groom/wedding party.

This story is an homage to the most spectacular failure I've ever witnessed personally. Names have been changed and venue has been omitted for decency sake.

The year was 2017 and wedding season was just slowing down. It was a balmy August day at a country club in Carlsbad, CA, and I had just finished the perfect touches on the sound set up for the DJ I was assisting that evening. He was from a top of the line, professional, “good as it gets” company and was a veteran of over 130 weddings, dances, events in his time. An immaculate professional I hope to be half as good as some day. We’ll call him Tony.

After a pretty laborious set up complete with up lighting, gobos, obscenely expensive DMX systems with everything from interchanging hues and colors to strobe functions…. AND meticulously setting the table within the boundaries the venue coordinator gave us, the stage was set. We camped out during the ceremony and nothing went awry from the entrance to the vows to the wedding party showing up dressed and on time. Fairy dust practically floated down making it a truly memorable moment. The bride's half was strict military types with over three dozen army, navy, marine corps, etc dressed to the nines and flawless in their uniforms. The groom's half was almost as serious and mostly Mormon, all dressed stunningly. Probably one of the most polished groups I'd seen in years, all of them fully embracing the unity of the ceremony and who was getting married. The couple that day we’ll call Randy and Sue.

The ceremony ends, prompting Tony and I to amble down to the reception where everything is already cued and ready to go. At this point I would stop and add probably the single biggest piece of advice I can to anyone getting married.

{DO NOT drink on your wedding day more than the toasts allow. It's the one day many, MANY people will remember for the rest of your lives and toeing the line of doing something regrettable because of liquid courage is just not worth it. Get hammered the next day but not "thee" day. What followed was a direct result of over consumption of alcohol, no other single factor was to blame aside from it.}

From what I overheard from the staff afterward, it began in the changing room as everyone was freshening up and getting ready for the grand entrance. Some asinine f!@# somehow found Absinthe and smuggled it in a few flasks for the bridesmaids and bride to "loosen up". Unfortunately, he wasn't aware that Absinthe is a banned liquor in the U.S. due to Thujone/Wormwood and the hallucinogenic properties involved once consumed. Strap in for the grand entrance.

Tony gently fades in the music and announces the names with finesse and enunciation any Grecian orator would have been proud of. The groomsmen begin waltzing in with the bridesmaids……..or should I say half carried them in. The mood of the entire room turned into something worse than the DMV without air conditioning within five seconds flat as one after the other, the bridesmaids half stumbled, half fell, half clomped to the dance floor all of them laughing hysterically. The groomsmen were bewildered and unsure what the joke was about and awkwardly smiled trying to fit the mood.

And then the 10th circle of hell was fully unleashed. The bride and groom entered as everyone stood, the song belted out nice and loud, and here comes a chagrined/mortified groom trying his best to keep the bride off him. And by off, I mean her hands and mouth were virtually everywhere inappropriate doing every imaginably indecent thing. Just atrocious. The atmosphere couldn't have been any more toxic and awful it was like being in the Holocaust Museum. The bride's family visibly stiffened, hunched, snorted in disbelief, red in the face, and openly gasped....God almighty it couldn't have been worse...but it did become worse. A lot worse.

After salvaging a horrific entrance, the first dances kicked off. Groom and mom were stylish and fun...bride and dad were like a gorilla carrying a mannequin. She nearly passed out in his arms. The photographer, that poor bas@#$%, he was sweating buckets trying to get a normal shot but between the shocked faces in the background, the simmering father in full marine uniform holding a flaccid daughter, and the nearly incoherent bride lolling about in his arms. It was a nightmare.

DJ Tony held a smile on his face the whole time like a champion and milked the "isn't this awkward and cute" vibe for as long as he could; but I could tell he was cracking by the minute. First dance comes on, back again come the lecherous/lascivious/grossly indecent hands and mouth. Tony cuts the dance off early and practically begs the servers to bring extra champagne.

From that point on everything seemed relatively normal and most folks seemed to recover somewhat. Food was delicious, our dining music was on point, and a modicum of peace returned. But for a wedding that was basically the Titanic sinking, the main iceberg was still coming.

Jump forward to opening the celebration for dancing. The very first song, “Uptown Funk”, comes roaring out of the speakers and nearly everyone floods the dance floor to shake off the abysmal images of earlier. Sadly, for our bridesmaids and bride, Absinthe is one hell of a liquor and for what must have been the equivalent of 8 shots a piece for each lady, the effects were still in full swing. The bride proceeded to dry hump and grind every one of bridesmaids and even some of the groomsmen, being pushed away multiple times. The bridesmaids reciprocated and started a grind train creating enough friction to rip some of their dresses. Sue hugged a center support beam for the ceiling and molested it like a bear itching a scratch. She stole, yes, stole drinks from anyone and everyone. The photographer, God bless him, tried his damndest to get even one normal shot where this red faced, sweating monstrosity wasn't belligerent and indecent. I would trade my car for the unedited shots from that wedding if I could find the guy again.

Finally, neither family could take it anymore and all of them, en masse, sat back down and grimaced as the strip tease continued unabated. Tony held his resolve as only a true professional could and played slower, family friendly, even downright un-danceable songs to try and slow down the she-devil but hell; she was on one.

At long last the groom, having sat in mortified silence by himself at the honor table for the last half hour gets up and walks to us, demanding the microphone. I punch him in on the sound board and raise the gain, bracing for impact for what seemed an imminently bad speech. Unbelievably, he proceeds to announce the wedding is ending early and for everyone to line up outside for the sparkler exit.

The cake had just been wheeled in, it was only 8pm, and we had been booked til 11:30, no one was remotely ready to leave, and the groom drops this bomb. Total shock. Wedding coordinator, venue director, and Tony all frantically thumbing through itineraries and notes to utter frustration realizing this is totally impromptu. Parents of both parties rising to feet in disbelief yet unable to say anything. All the rest of the guests just staring dumbfounded.

Even Tony, brave, unwavering Tony, doesn't have a song prepared to counter the announcement and fumbles for a few seconds until lobbing “Dear Future Husband” into the speakers out of sheer panic. Slowly, like an avalanche heading toward a nursery the guests rise and amble out. It was so dead quiet you could hear the angels crying.

Sparklers are lit, the cake remains uncut and unserved, Tony and the coordinator are desperately trying to convince Randy this isn't necessary and the night can still be a success, and I'm camped out trying to find a song that could possibly be of any use. I settle on "I Won't Give Up" by Jason Mraz in hopes of having some miracle happen and already knowing it won't.

Then the iceberg was finally struck head on by bridezilla in her Titanic. She had drank so much and neglected to hydrate, she got a nose bleed, and a big one. Spilled out and covered the top half of her 2K dollar dress in blood and snot and burst into sobs. Randy puts on a face like he's a Vietnam survivor or something, picks her up, and leads her blood covered, mucus dripping disaster of a bride through the sparkler exit to cheers and then silence. The photographer, save his soul, he just said "f@#$ it" and used his camera on full auto capturing every gloriously inglorious second. Sounded someone flipping through a deck of cards how rapid the clicking of his Nikon was.

After they left, everyone peeled out quicker then if there was an anthrax warning. I mean everyone. It was the saddest and most awful wedding I've ever been to and probably ever will be to. Tony, the coordinator, and myself all sat together listening to slow jams eating the wedding cake by ourselves (it was delicious, German chocolate with ice cream) discussing how in all our years of events nothing like this had ever happened. Tony, who had been doing weddings for over 20 years, had never been canceled on so early and out of nowhere. The coordinator estimated the wedding was over 60K easily, most of which was on food, drinks, and cake that the guests didn't even get to enjoy.

I hope everything worked out in the end, but this story really did happen and will continue to be number one on the hall of shame for weddings. Please please PLEASE....do not drink on your wedding day more than the toasts. Fin.

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I know this is an old thread and i've been on terrible wedding kicks. But this is the best story.

I wish there was part 2

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Thanks for the shout out Alyssa. I wouldn't be surprised if that couple was separated by now and on to ruin the next country club. If you start a new thread I think I have one more story from my "hall of shame" annals I could impart for everyone's hilarity. A true, if not precautionary tale of I would call "The Night of the Lost Itinerary" or something like that.

Have a good one. Cheers.

Honestly, the worst weddings I've been to were as a vendor. So as not to stir up trouble in case a bride recognizes this, I won't say what kind of vendor other than one that has to be onsite the entire duration of the event.

One bride had... issues. There really is no other word for it. The makeup artists showed up that morning to start on her wedding party and she fired them for reasons known only to her. The bridesmaids claimed it was because she was mad about how early they had shown up, but certainly that was in her contract? And the fact that she had six bridesmaids, plus herself - the amount of time for them to get ready was probably significant.

This wedding started three and a half hours late. No exaggeration. Her guests were literally sitting in their chairs at the ceremony site, waiting for three and a half hours. No food, no drinks, no music. And it was not planned this way - it was because she 1: was trying to do her makeup herself, hated it, and redid it and then had a bridesmaid redo it, so her makeup and hair were done three times, and 2: she had a meltdown that took her over two hours to get herself back together. She kept having to be escorted downstairs by her bridesmaid so she could smoke weed on the front lawn. The guests were starting to get nasty with us over the fact the ceremony hadn't started.

The cake had been dropped off at its original scheduled time, but because it was out there three and a half hours longer than it should have been, the sun shifted, and melted the entire backside of the cake off. The onsite wait staff frantically tried to fix it and cover it with flowers out of a centerpiece.

The food was cold - and she later tried to make the caterer give her a discount! The food was cold because it was served nearly four hours late, you lunatic!

Icing on the cake (or, well, not) as you might imagine, is that this cut significantly into her reception time. She had chosen a venue in an area with a noise ordinance at 10:00pm. Her reception didn't start until 9:30. When the DJ cut the music at 10, she was pleading with him to keep playing. The neighbors of the venue came over and were threatening to call the cops, and she LOSES IT on them, "THIS IS MY WEDDING. I PAID $10,000 TO HAVE MY WEDDING HERE. GET OUT." I cut out the various obscenities that this statement was laced with to keep it appropriate for a public forum.

The cops did show up, and made it clear to the DJ - who was stuck in the middle of this fiasco - that he was done for the night. Period.

The other was actually on a vendor. We are at a wedding where this photographer, who has a faint French accent, is telling us (another vendor) all about her grand, international photography business. Cool, whatever. She then proceeds to tell us that the couple couldn't really afford her, but that she made a very special package for them because they just loved her work so much. She says she won't be there for the full reception as a result, because they couldn't afford to pay her to be there the entire day. Again, cool, whatever. I don't care. I'm there the whole day.

About halfway through the reception, she takes the couple, and I find out she's grabbed a few handfuls of guests and is faking a sparkler exit (presumably because she's leaving early, as mentioned.) The problem is that a lot of guests thought this actually was the end of the wedding and left! Two hours into the reception!

But what really got me was that as I was wandering around - after she was supposed to have left, by the way - I find her sitting in the lounge area with a beer, telling the couple's guests all about how they couldn't actually afford her. It was one thing to tell other vendors that, but to tell their guests! This was YEARS ago and I am STILL floored.

I ran into this bride about three years after the wedding... and found out they never even got their photos.