Wishing well or honey moon funds?

My FBIL and his wife did a honeymoon fund. We got them a blender instead.

Yeah, most people here (and I assume in the world) consider honeymoon funds tacky. Not sure what a wishing well is, but I can guess, and would make the same assumption.

I may be one of the only people that actually doesn't find it tacky. I'm not doing it, because I do know many people that DO find it distasteful. Also (though I regret it) we purchased a timeshare so our honeymoon should be pretty inexpensive.

A lot of couples (like FH and I) have been living together for years and already have much of what people typically register for. I feel like a registry is where you tell people what you want to receive (if they choose to buy you a gift), so if you want to swim with the Dolphins, I'll make that my gift. I don't care, I'm spending the money on your gift anyway!! Lol

If it makes you guys happy, I'd do it. People that don't like the idea will buy you something else. Just do a standard registry also, so those people don't buy things you wouldn't want.

Hi FutureMrsTW - Most people here don't think highly of honeyfunds or asking for cash for the wedding. As you said, there are many different ways in which people "phrase" it or whatever, but in the end, it really turns out to be the bride and groom asking for cash.

Honeyfunds take a % of the money you receive. Can I suggest that if you are wanting cash, just make a very small registry. Your guests will get the hint, and most likely you will get cash. (and you won't have a company taking money off the top for their fees) Good luck!

Definitely tacky

I really don't see what the problem is. I had a family member ask for dolphin swimming and scuba diving gifts in Hawaii. It was a new thing for most of my family members but no one was offended. Its an easier way to gift someone, you don't have to go pick up and wrap something . its not going to end up in storage. My man and I plan to do it for a trip of a lifetime cruise in Europe. No one has said anything to us about it being "tacky" or "rude". We have been living together for 5 years we don't need kitchen equipment or crystal. I say go for it!

In my opinion if you have everything you need then don't register and don't have a shower. Let people instinctively give you cash or buy you a gift of their choosing. If you want to spend the money you receive on your honeymoon that's great, but don't tell people what to buy you, that's tacky.

I don't mind when a couple registers through Honeyfund (they do take a small percentage, but it's not much), but I really don't like the "Honeymoon Jars" or the money dance. One girl on here posted that a bride who had invited her to the wedding had stated on the INVITE itself that they wanted cash, and then called to ask if she saw it. That kind of stuff I'm not okay with. I'm the kind of person that would rather know exactly what someone wants. We won't be doing it for our registry, but I don't mind seeing someone else registered through it.

Asking for cash for a luxury vacation is incredibly rude. People may not mention it to your face, but they'll be thinking it.

We have a HoneyFund and I don't regret it - many people have told us how creative they think it is. My FH and I are both over 30, have great F/T jobs and have lived alone for years! There was a lot of things that we weren't holding out for marriage to purchase! I mean, if you don't need a blender (or any other household item), most people end up returning it to the store for cash (if there was a gift receipt) or a gift card for some other purchase.

We put the info on our wedding website and we already have categories that are fully funded. You have to do what you and your FH are comfortable and happy with! Good luck!

I like the idea of the honeyfund, but I don't like that it takes out a percentage. So I won't be doing one.

I'll be just doing a small registry to replace certain things (new cooking wear, sheets and linens, decorating items, etc). If you could do word of moth to let people know you'd rather receive a monetary gifts for your honey moom than physical item, that may work better. I've told me close friends I'd rather have money to put towards my honeymoon, but that's about it.

But personally, I wouldn't mind if I was invited to a wedding that had a honeyfund...but I wouldn't use the site, I'd write them a check or give them cash w/a wedding card to hand to them at the wedding. Like I said I'd rather have all my money be given to them, not have a percentage for fees to be taken out.

While sites do charge a fee, you do get something in return. We intend to use Wanderable, and they do a lot more than host a beautiful website for us. Let's say you purchase us a museum tour from our registry. When we are on said tour, we snap a pic of ourselves or of an interesting exhibit and upload it to the site. You, as the giver, receive a personalized post card of that picture letting you know that you'll always be a part of this special memory! It's a really nice personal touch. Not to mention, Wanderable has curated experiences which have zero fees - good stuff too, not the bottom barrel. Guests also have the option to chip in on gifts too, so it works with any budget.

If I'm not mistaken wanderable still charges people who uses their credit card 2.5% charge rate. Either the couple pays for it themselves or the guest pays 102 total so the couple can get 100. I don't know though.... nothing is "free" with these honeymoon registry sites.

I don't find it Tacky.. everyone else is entitled to their opinions...

If you are looking for a way to get cash at your wedding, do nothing. People will give you cashould anyways. We have a huge registry and we got about 98% cash. No need to do some stupid gimmicky thing. I hate wishing wells, and I if I see them I purposefully give a gift instead. Im not a fan of honey funds either.

Wanderable charges 2.5% on uncurated items. Curated items have zero fees. I absolutely agree that it's hella rude to pass the fee along to your guests! And we will only be registering for things we truly want to do, so every gift will be greatly appreciated and definitely used.

Before I am ripped to shreds, we also plan to have a very small traditional registry. We won't be posting our registry info anywhere.

@Zoe - I wont rip you to shreds - don't know about everyone else though JK

I do think Honeyfunds are becoming more common and I think in the future it's going to be a lot more acceptable. My close friends even suggests I do the honeymoon funds, but I just don't want them to be charged/nor do I want to cover the extra charges myself. It's personal preference in my opinion. If were to have done a honeymoon fund I would have just posted the link on our wedding website - and only would have printed the link to my wedding website on the invites.

A few of my family members asked if we were going to have a honeymoon registry. I figured it would be pretty tacky. We did two store registries and will also have one set up with our travel agency. If someone wants to contribute, they can call and give X amount of money. Apparently the agency will send them a gift certificate type of thing to give to us so it will be like a gift card. The agent told us she has 3 couples with them right now and has done a bunch in the past. She is our family agent so I don't feel as bad for having one. So if people want to give us towels, contribute to the honeymoon, or give us nothing, it's up to them.

I'm not sure what the wishing well is!

Before planning my wedding I went to a couple of weddings where they had a honey fund. At the time I didn't think anything of it and chose to use it for their gifts. Then when I was planning my own and read Ms. Manner's wedding book I saw it in another light