Why are seating charts a thing?

Seating charts should avoid having you stuck at a table where you don't know anyone, but it sounds like you've had some bad luck so far I totally get it! DH and I always get the shaft on the seating chart because DH is so outgoing and friendly. He was a groomsman in a friend's wedding and we got assigned to the table with the bride's co-workers..."because he can talk to anyone!"

Just try to be more conscientious of your guests when it's time to make your table assignments

Been to wedding with and without seating charts. We aren't doing a seating chart for several reasons:

1) we are only having >60 people (more than half is FH's family which is all of "his" invites

2) my family is incredibly small (4). "My" invites are all friends who all hang together

3) had an open seating at FH's cousin's wedding and all of his siblings loved it because no one had to sit with FMIL (she complains a lot). If there was assigned seating it would have made it a lot less enjoyable by following the "don't break up families" rule

4) we are having a buffet

5) no bridal party

With all of that being said, I think our circumstances are a little different than most and our wedding is on the smaller side.

If we had plated dinner, more non family guests or more people, we would assign tables.

I think it is worse to not have one and couples and families getting split up during dinner.

If you've been At other weddings and assigned to tables where you didn't know anyone, that's the bride and grooms fault, not the seating chart's fault.

Assign tables not seats! Less chaos and more order. Otherwise you're going to need like 2-3 extra tables to accommodate people who sit awkwardly

I made one the other day and what I did was put four people from his side and four people from my side at each table

We did one for several reasons:

1. Buffet - no one wants to lose their seat when they get up to get food or be searching for a seat with their hands filled with food.

2. Fairly large wedding and did not want to have people grouping together causing couples to split up.

3. We had some people who chose not to bring a plus one and would not know many people at the wedding. We sat those people with others who had similar interests. (So far this has worked well as there are now two couples who would not have met but for being sat at the same tables)

You should do a seating chart. No guest wants to be looking for an empty seat.

Seating charts are a thing because its nice to guide your guests. So your guests aren't wandering around clueless and trying to find seats for themselves. That being said - they are only needed if your guest list is over 100 or so. 80 or less can usually seat themselves without issues.

I've only gone to one wedding, without assigned tables. We got stuck at a table with a couple of uninvited kids, who were the epitome of brattiness the whole night. It just showed us the couple really didn't care about guests' comfort. It was also obvious in the poor hosting (quality and quantity of food), too

It's on you to make sure everyone knows at least one person. That's not a reason not to do a seating chart.

@JerseyGirl, you need to have a seating chart with 60 people.

Remember that feeling in middle and high school where everyone is seated in their little cluster and seemingly closed to having anyone else sit with them? Seating charts prevent that.

On the budget side if you refuse to do a seating chart- You need 20% more tables, chairs, settings, linens and centerpieces because people don't magically sit themselves into groups of 8.

I guess I'm the same way bc I just don't want to do it. Ive always had plenty of family and friends at a wedding except babes sisters. Years ago at her wedding he was in wedding party and at head table but he thought I'd be fine bc we would all be family soon. Awkward for me. Our event is 70% his family and 30% mine. It's hard to put people together and mix the families.

At the very least assign tables. And no matter how small the guest list reserve seats for VIPs. It is shocking to me to see guests take front row at the ceremony and at the reception, especially when not roped off/sign hanging. It happens All. The. Time.

Please have a seating chart. I've been to quite a few weddings and a few did not have them. I would have been happier by being stuck with people I didn't know vs having to stand or run around like an idiot trying to find a seat. Just sit couples with couples and things like that.

I'm extremely introverted. If I were to arrive at a wedding reception only to find out I'd have to sit separately from my fh b/c the bride/groom were too lazy to do a seating chart, I'd leave. I'm too old and I hate people too much to play that musical chairs bullshit.

I'm a UO here on this.

I'm 41 and have been in several weddings, and a guest at countless weddings of all budgets(and this was my second) and not once was there a seating chart for any of the weddings. Not one single time. Well, when I say "all budgets" I must admit that I have never been to a black-tie, plated meal served by waiters wedding, but to buffet, BBQ, food truck, and semi-plated meals (retrieved on own, not served to the table).

I did not do one, nor do I regret not doing one. We did have a few reserved seats for DH's parents (mobility issues) a sweetheart table, and BP table (so they could sit with SOs). We also set up an extra table so the likelihood of a family or couple getting split would decrease. We had about 110 guests.

With that, nobody asked where a seating chart was, which table they were seated at, and prior to the wedding, when handing me an RSVP, a friend asked "are you going to tell me where I have to sit when I eat?" When I replied, "No" she said, "thank fricken goodness. I hate that." Frankly, I don't feel I need to be told where to sit either. I can sit my ass down somewhere to eat for a few minutes.

I think it honestly, truly depends on your crowd. That is MY opinion though, and it will get refuted to the hilt here. I stood back and watched to see if the "wandering around with plates of food" I was told would absolutely happen did, and I didn't see one person doing such. I looked for the split couple, or the table with obnoxious kids, total strangers eating awkwardly.... I just didn't see it happen. I even searched photos of the reception (both from our photographer and those friends took and shared).

Many of our guests knew each other or a at least a few others there, and they just acted like the grown ups we were serving alcohol to and found a seat. If they are grown up enough to drink, they are grown up enough to not be a jackass and leave just a single seat open, and they are grown up enough to mind their kids and approach a table and ask "is this seat taken?" We did have a rather casual wedding. We had a food truck and no set "service time." They served from ceremony end until 30 minutes prior to reception end. Our reception started at about 4, so people ate when they got hungry (or started to get drunk), otherwise they were mingling and chatting with folks until they wanted to get a plate. There were also a couple tables of appetizers between the bar and the reception area, so some socialized near/around there. As it turned out, there was about a 30 minute time frame where nearly everyone was seated and eating or socializing at the tables and it didn't look like anyone was excluded. Maybe I just got really lucky (or maybe my wedding is all the gossip behind my back that my nearest and dearest friends and family couldn't wait to trash on me for). Either way, everyone seemed to play nice and be all smiles. We got lots of positive feedback on the food, drink, the wedding in general.

There was ONE time where I was at a wedding where it was uncomfortable and awkward, but it had nothing to do with the lack of a seating chart. It was 100% due to the fact that they had about 120 guests and exactly 4 picnic tables, 4 to-5 blankets on the ground, and 80 plastic chairs set up in rows (for the ceremony). So, many people were balancing plates on their laps with no actual table to sit at.

If you decide that you don't want to do a seating chart, I strongly urge you to make sure you have an extra table or two set up so couples or families don't get split (it COULD still happen, but it is somewhat preventative). It was worth the extra linen, table, and chair rental, plus the centerpieces price.

In the end, only you can decide what you are doing and what will work for your guest list. If you are providing them with ample places to sit, good food, good drink, and some music to listen to, then you are properly "hosting."

@ALC- thank you for the suggestion. I disagree. Especially when we have extra seats available, more than 60% of the guest list is FH's family and my side of invites will fit comfortably at two tables.

Like I said, our situation is unique.

OP, you coming back?