What’s your comfort level?

I think for me this depends on whose wedding it is. if you're a close friend then absolutely. if you're my sibling then absolutely. but if you're just someone like a coworker then it would really depend on how i think things will be in july.

I don't see this as a war between optimism and pessimism but more a divide between those relying on facts, science, and real experts and those...who are not.

I will not be attending any large gatherings this summer (and likely into fall). And I sincerely hope local governments make the right choices to guide their citizens to the right thing. There is no health-related downside to waiting (I do understand there are financial downsides) until we are really in the clear. And to me, health is everything.

It would also not sway me if everyone at an event wore a mask because non-respirator masks don't actually provide protection for oneself, and how would one eat and drink with a mask on anyway??

So for the OP trying to make a decision about a July wedding, I would use all reasonable caution and the recommendations of local officials to weigh your options, rather than polling your "optimistic friends", because optimism doesn't provide protection from viruses.

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That's so great to hear that social distancing and shutdowns have helped your region. Now is the best time to keep all of that up to make sure there isn't a flare up.

I personally would NOT feel comfortable attending. July 12th is way too soon for a gathering that large, in my opinion.

I would not feel comfortable. I’m not even sure if I’ll feel comfortable seeing family members in July but I’m just taking things as they come and listening to my doctor.

We got married on March 14. Ohio literally shut down the very next day. Rescheduling was not an option - per the venue. I went from being very calm & happy to extremely panicked & stressed in the matter of 2-3 days prior. The COVID situation escalated so fast!! We had a lot of people decline to come 0-2 days prior....We had turned in our final count and paid the balance the week before. We lost quite a bit of money. But what do you do? They all had a valid reason to cancel. Several immune compromised and/or older family members (including my mom) made the decision to come anyway. We spent the first 2-weeks of our marriage worried that someone we love could get sick and die because they came to OUR wedding. By the grace of God - no one got sick.

So - my point is this...... If you move forward, be prepared for a lot of declines and a lot of extra stress - even in the days after your wedding.

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This is probably the best and most accurate response you'll get. But I would not go in July with that many people, and I also wouldn't have a wedding in July with that many people. A lot of people won't come and those there won't feel comfortable being there.

Sadly, no I would not feel comfortable. My fiance's family is from NJ/NY and they told us if our wedding happens in August, unfortunately they won't be coming. That is about 60 of our guests. I'm currently trying to get my venue to let me postpone (no luck yet). I'm in Maryland and some of my wedding party, also said they are very uncomfortable with a wedding in August.

Absolutely not. I am sorry. The packed dance floor sounds especially irresponsible. I don't see how such an event would even be legal this year. The guests who do show up would probably be a) your nearest and dearest and b) those who don't take the virus seriously and haven't been taking precautions.


Relaxing shelter in place rules does not mean we are safe from coronavirus. It means the ICU currently has bed space for you because we managed to slow the rate of infection. If the virus resurges (which is very likely to happen if people let their guard down) the government will likely have to shut everything down again.
Some couples are getting married in a super small ceremony with just them or just family, and postponing the big wedding for later. If you have your heart set on a 150 person wedding, I would push it back to after spring 2021 when we are likely to have a vaccine.

I think 150 for NJ might not be possible in two months (but I’m hoping it will be). I’m in NYC and they are moving very slowly to reopen the state. Would I attend if my state was open ? Yes.

For people in areas not yet substantially affected by the Coronavirus who are convinced it's little risk to you and your potential guests, before you make a decision to move forward, Google "Albany, GA Coronavirus outbreak" to read about how mourners attending a small town funeral quickly became of one of the early largest per capita outbreaks in the country. I truly understand what an incredibly difficult decision this is, but carefully considering all the information can be helpful. Good luck!

Nope. I would not be comfortable with that. Which is why we decided to postpone our 80-90 guest July 18 wedding out to next summer just last week, especially since about half our guests would be traveling from out of town for it.

That being said, we are moving ahead with planning a very small ceremony (no more than 10-15 people, family and a few close friends) and dinner party or cookout afterwards (about 20 people from our local area).

View Quoted Comment That’s what we’ve been talking about too. Do you plan on wearing your dress to the small ceremony. I’m torn on wearing my beautiful dress twice or looking too over dressed lol

I would not attend either. If you were in a state or county with barely any cases, then maybe but NJ has been hit so badly. My FH also would probably not want to, unless your wedding is totally outside. He is a dentist and still working every other day, and he has been trying to be extra careful when going outside as he is worried he would catch it and give it to patients without knowing. While we are not as worried about catching it, we are worried about spreading it to other vulnerable people so being around 145 people would not work for us.

TBD. I've ordered a couple alternative dresses to try on and see how I feel about them for this year's wedding. If I end up not liking them, I'll wear my original dress for both weddings, but save the veil/accessories for the postponed ceremony next summer so it still feels special/different, and change into a more casual cocktail dress for the cookout/dinner afterwards this year.

I think trying to have a large wedding will be pushing it, but I would support an intimate wedding. As much as I am over being locked down, I still would like to avoid crowds. I hated them to begin with so this scenario doesn't help. Haha. Something else to keep in mind, do you want masks in your wedding photos? I wouldn't want to pay for a photographer and not be able to see who is in the photos.

I know this is heartbreaking but my wedding was also scheduled for this July 17 and I’m in NY I knew in my heart that it wouldn’t happen this summer and with such a large amount of people it’s a risk for sure people will not feel comfortable and for me I had way to many guests that I would be putting at risk. I pushed it to October but still knew that wouldn’t work I don’t think large gatherings will be happening at all this year especially after my governor put out the phases and entertainment is phase 4 we’re not even at phase 1. Then he said large gatherings are not your friend right now. My fiancé then lost his job and we just couldn’t do it all anymore the stress the unknown it’s to much so we canceled. I think you should reach out to your venue and see what options you have especially if you are looking to postpone I would do that quick because dates are going fast with all this going on. Sorry your going through this I know how sad I was about the loss of my summer wedding but on a happier note we’re still planning to elope on our original date! All the best to you!

Probably not


You should enjoy it and let friends and family enjoy you paying lot money for it

To be honest, zero chance.

I'm in Northern NJ.

No. I would feel *very* uncomfortable, which is honestly a moot point, because we aren't going to be that open by then.

I work in the service and the arts, and I don't expect to return to any kind of work at any of my old jobs for months and months, yet. We're crossing our fingers and hoping we'll be able to make a family wedding, in VT, in October. (But I remain skeptical.)

While the curve is bending, opening up too soon will send us spiraling again - and South Jersey is still peaking. Murphy knows this. He has opened up parks, but that is to keep citizens moving and healthy.

I'm sorry. It's rough.