What would you do?

I would be cool, and observe first. I have done this before. If it’s confirmed then I would show him all the proof I collect, pack and leave. To me, cheaters always cheat. Liar always lie. They will never satisfied with one, it doesn’t matter who they have as partner, they will always need the others.


Good luck, and I hope it’s false alarm.

I agree with PP. keep your eyes open and keep track of things and if there is more things that you find I would confront him. You certainly don’t want to move forward if there is something going on. Good luck

Was the message from someone you know or have ever heard of? I disagree with others, I’d definitely ask about it.

I’m really sorry. Sounds like a red flag to me. I once had a similar experience and it was a huge disaster. I definitely wouldn’t just sweep it under the rug.

I would absolutely say something, especially if you really are leaving in a week. If you don’t say anything now, are you just going to wait to see what he does while you’re gone?

I would say nothing and simply observe. He did leave his cell in the room and left. Typically, a man doesn't leave his cell behind ... Maybe his friend was asking what he should do (the friend) ...

Do you know if it’s a spam text?

Sounds like it could be a spam text, to me. I would just ask him about it and say you happened to see it pop up while you were making the bed.

That text doesn’t make any sense to me— I agree with PPs right above me, it sounds like Spam. (Why would some girl be referring to another girl leaving in a week?). I’d ask about it before jumping to any sort of conclusion.

I think sometimes as women we talk too much. In this case, remaining silent and watching will give you the information you need to make a sound decision. Wisdom needs to override emotion.

I’m in shock. I’m glad you grabbed a screen shot. Did you get the number it was from?! I’d definitely confront him pretending I had other evidence and if I couldn’t rattle him show him the text. But I’m not sure if I’d try to get more evidence first?


Years ago I was with a boyfriend who was “friends” with his ex (living in another state). Long story but I didn’t trust him, even if it was just an emotional affair. I went through his email, found her name, and called 411 for her number (she lived in a small town and had an unusual name). He didn’t physically cheat but among other reasons I broke up with him after I talked to her (I let him have it but he was more upset I upset his “friend” than us breaking up). 😡

I guess the big question is... are you leaving in a week?

I would definitely ask ... explain what you were doing and what you saw accidentally and just want to know who that is or what is it about? Don’t be confrontational about just ask the question ... and see his behavior/tone of voice. Communication is the key to a healthy relationship. It’s not fair to him or to you to go about your day with negative thought about a simple text that could really be nothing serious. It might be worse if you wait it out because it can come out when you guys have a disagreement and make the situation worse. There is tons of pressure with everything that it’s going on don’t add more to your plate. We all need positivity right now. I hope it’s all a miss understanding. Good luck!

Sounds like this woman texting him is a home wrecker... to me that sounds like a reply after being told he's in a relationship. "Ooh not looking for love just tryna bang while ur fiance is gone for a week teehee" ...hell nah. I would 100% confront him but don't attack him when u do. He could be innocent. Or this could be a huge red flag. Ugh.. sorry ur even dealing with this 😔

I believe that everything happens for a reason, and that messaged showed up while you were in the room because it’s something you need to see. I would absolutely confront him, because you’re going to drive yourself crazy otherwise. I would keep it calm and gauge his response, and then act accordingly.. I would not commit to someone if they’re not giving me 100% of themself. Trust your gut!

I would ask in a very non-accusatory way. It sounds like spam because the message doesn't make much sense. But if that's what it is, then it won't be a big deal. And it would seem like a bigger deal later if you collect a bunch of "evidence" and then present a ton of random events that convince you he's cheating and they're all just spam or normal events. That will seem very aggressive to him. Plus, if something is bothering you, you should be able to say "I saw this and I'm nervous, can we talk about it?" without any big issues. Good luck and I hope it's nothing!

This is not something to sweep under the rug in my opinion! Who is sending him that text?and why would they knowing he's in a committes relationship,even as a joke. I think it's a conversation worth having. The approach is key where you don't want to accuse but you want to "understand"logically why he would receive a text like that

I keep thinking about you, op. Did you asked him? What did he say? Woodlyne made a point here.


The sender KNOWS you are leaving in a week, and it seems like they had a conversation about meeting when you are gone.
Sorry, op. But to me this is a huge red flag.

FOLLOW UP: most of the wknd I spent wasted by worry but finally this morning before he got up for work I brought it up to him. I explained that when I was making our bed his cell pinged and I automatically glanced over and saw a msg from a Beth F. Who is she and why would she be sending you a text like that? He chuckled and said she is the woman he painted her home for and that she was asking him if he knew of someone for her daughter. He also said he didn’t quite get why she would ask that from him but she thought that maybe he knew of a nice guy they could introduce. I did let him know it was pretty crappy on her part to send a text like that to Him which he agreed. I also went on to say that “everything Happens for a reason”. Hence why the text came through while I was right there 👍 He totally agreed and was his normal self w the whole conversation. He assured me that I am the only one he wants and that he loves what we have. I wish I never let “her” get the best of me and just let it go but it was a weight lifted off my shoulders and I’m feeling myself YEAH!! Appreciate all the reply’s ladies SO much. Prayer got me through it asking for wisdom 🙏 Let the wedding go on 🙃


Side note: It was her daughter who was leaving here in a week that she was looking for a nice guy to hang out with.

I wouldn't wait, you have proof that there's something fishy going on behind your back. I'd definitely confront him immediately.