What to do when someone asks for a plus one?

Your friend sounds tacky AF. A boyfriend isn't a plus one - he's part of a social list. And a B-list, seriously? Yikes.

A boyfriend isn't a plus one, they're a social unit and have to be invited together. Add that to the B list and your "friend" is being tacky af.

A boyfriend is not a plus one. A couple should always be invited as a social unit. And WTF? A B-list. No. Tack AF.

I did not give a plus one to my guests that were not in a relationship - most are church folk and they know each other and our venue is small.

If they were a known couple, I extended the invite to both of them as a unit.

A couple of people have put a plus one on their invite. I called them and let them know that I was at the venue max, but if I received enough declines I would let them know so their plus-one could come. (Their plus-one was just a friend)

I allowed for everyone to get a plus one

Unfortunately your friend is playing the dangerous game of poor wedding etiquette so people will be upset.

Ultimately she should have done a better job in the early planning stages of guest list drafting.

At this point proper etiquette says she should allow the boyfriend to come and the B list should be dropped entirely because it's hurtful to be B-listed.

But at the same time I've seen so so so many articles that say "modern couples" have done away with many traditions and standards and they mention the use of B-listing and Honeyfunds so apparently poor etiquette is trending...

Ok. I'm not sure if she has a literal or a figurative B list...I don't have a B list, but I thought a lot of people did. I guess I was trying to sympathize for her that weddings are expensive, etc...but good to see other peoples thoughts.

@endofadarrah you are right, it is a dangerous game...not really worth hurting other peoples feelings.

That sounds like a bad situation. If your friend cannot fit another guest, they cannot fit another guest. But expect the person to decline the invitation.

@Melissa B.

Sometimes the good friends don't realize what the bride is doing. I say this only because when recently discussing my wedding with my MOH, who I was a bridesmaid for a couple years ago, I found out she did both of these things! She told me I should make a B list and that no ring no bring was a standard rule. It was a huge shock to me!

I was perpetually single before starting dating my FI afterwards, so not getting a plus 1 at the time did not bother me.

Is this a serious post? The boyfriend situation is bad enough and then I kept reading and saw "the B List"....

The boyfriend is not a plus one, so get that term out of your discussions with your friend. The boyfriend should automatically be invited and at this point, your friend would be lucky if the friend who wasn't invited with her boyfriend even wants to attend this poorly hosted wedding.

Also, people who have manners and understand how to treat people properly do not have b-lists.

I got asked this yesterday for a single friend who was simply trying to interpret the invitation that was addressed to only her. I told her that we do not have the room in our budget to accommodate additional guests. She understood, and will know plenty of people at the wedding. If she had a boyfriend it would be different. Everyone has a different opinion on this, but I'm personally not giving plus ones. Spouses/relationships aren't 'plus ones' to me.

I've never heard of "no ring no bring" Lol

A couple should always be invited together. Always.

I gave every person who was single a "plus one". If they are dating, I invited their SO. Just how it goes. One person I was not aware of had an SO, and she called and asked, and of course I said yes.

Your friend is tacky.

Someone's significant other should always be invited, regardless of how long they've been together or how serious they are.

You should never have a B list, that's rude too.

If your friends are dating someone, their significant other should be invited. If you don't know if they're dating someone a) why are they on your list if you don't know them well enough to know already b)ask them.

Don't B list.

Tacky Tabatha strikes again

It can't be argued any way at all. Ya tacky not to invite someone's significant other regardless of meeting or not meeting that person.

Also, b-list?? That's gross.

Your friend sounds like she needs a dose of WeddingWire. Tell her to join! Maybe she will come to her senses and learn proper etiquette.

Honestly, I didn't know the relationship status of a lot of my relatives who I invited, like some of my cousins who I really don't talk to a lot.

I felt it was better to just give everyone a plus 1, so that I didn't run into this situation and I could plan for the most amount of guests I should expect.

Now, I think she almost needs to say no, even though it's rude and he should have been included from the start. But, based on how she invited, if she says yes now, she would then have to look back at other guests she didn't extend the plus 1 to and hope they don't need one. I know I would be angry if I was told I couldn't bring a significant other and when I attended the even someone else had theirs.

Personally the only time I feel a boyfriend or girlfriend isn't a plus one is when the person is in high school.