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Just Said Yes September 2022

What to call my male best friend who is not in the bridal party, but is involved in the wedding?

Elizabeth, on March 20, 2021 at 12:12 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 9

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Hi! I am hoping for some creative minds to help me out here. I am very traditional and while I love my male best friend, I do not want him to be standing up with my bridesmaids at my wedding. However, I want to honor him as my friend and not just throw him into my fiancé’s side as a groomsman. We are having a Catholic wedding, so my thought is to ask him to walk my grandmother down the aisle, ask him to do a reading, and I would like for him to speak at our reception in addition to our best man and maid of honor speeches. I am getting ready to ask my bridal party to be in the wedding, and I would like to be able to have a cute name for his role when I ask him. I know I could use bridesman (which he won’t really be) or attendant, but I am hoping for something a little more cute/creative. Any suggestions would be much appreciated! Thanks!

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9 Comments

Latest activity by Kristen, on March 22, 2021 at 4:26 PM

VIP October 2022
Samantha · on March 20, 2021 at 12:17 PM
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I’m giving some people corsages. These are good friends who are close enough to be in the bridal party, but we’re just having our kids. So I want to honor my friends who have been with me through the hard times.
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Champion December 2022
Michelle · on March 20, 2021 at 12:20 PM
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Why does he need a title? He's doing the job of an usher, the officiant and the MC.
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Super October 2022
AJ · on March 20, 2021 at 12:20 PM
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I get wanting to honor him but it seems unnecessary. I mean he really doesn't need a title at all. My FH gave a reading at his friends wedding and didn't have a title.
He won't be an usher which is what you could ask him to do if you really want to include him in wedding function things - and that way he will have a title.
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Master 0000
Judith · on March 20, 2021 at 3:42 PM
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You are very early to ask your ladies. most who do it very early end up wishing thet had waited, as they are more like to get to wedding day with the people they started with, if they wait. There is nothing a bridesmaid needs to do before 7 months. BM dresses come in 2-12 weeks after ordering, so that is done in the 4th or fifth month. So 8-11 months out is the maximum. People lose interest, move, get pregnant, change jobs or finances if you ask at 16 months out.
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Master 0000
Judith · on March 20, 2021 at 3:47 PM
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I think if you want to give a title, Friend of the Bride is nice, and far less likely to have him made fun of by others than a Cute and inventive title. .
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Super June 2021
Elizabeth · on March 21, 2021 at 12:05 AM
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I have a similar person in my wedding but I'm just calling her a Reader. She knows her role in my life is big, and I consider Reader to be a position of honor, especially because FH and I are most excited for the mass.
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Super June 2021
Elizabeth · on March 21, 2021 at 12:06 AM
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Fwiw I totally agree, wish I hadn't asked so early (though I didn't mean to, wedding had to be postponed due to covid)
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Liz · on March 21, 2021 at 2:54 AM
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If you really want to give him a title, then maybe ‘honored friend’. (Although I agree with others on a title not being necessary.) I really like Samantha’s suggestion of a corsage as well.
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Expert October 2021
Kristen · on March 22, 2021 at 4:26 PM
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Seems to me he fits the bill for usher pretty well. You don't need a fancy title for him. I am also traditional in that all my bridesmaids are female, and all the groomsmen are in fact men. People who give readings don't typically have titles. Several years ago, my fiance was in one of his groomsmen's wedding. One of the ushers' wives gave a reading, and as far as I remember, she didn't have a "title", other than "Reading given by *insert name here*".
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