Candace
Savvy February 2020

What *tacky* thing are you doing??

Candace, on December 16, 2019 at 10:53 PM Posted in Planning 2 58
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Just curious if anyone else is doing something "tacky" or "taboo" at their wedding. This is my second wedding - my first husband lost his 3 year battle with brain cancer - and although I wouldn't have changed anything about my first wedding at the time, there are traditions and expectations that I just don't care about this time around. So what terrible, horrible thing are you doing that bucks convention?



(Our worst offense is that we're doing a potluck reception! 😯 )

58 Comments

Latest activity by Shannon, on January 6, 2020 at 12:14 AM
  • Destiny
    VIP May 2020
    Destiny ·
    • Flag
    My fmil says our entire wedding is unconventional. Public parks, no wedding party, fh is grilling food at reception
    • Reply
  • Marissa
    Dedicated July 2020
    Marissa ·
    • Flag
    Gasp! How dare you! 😉 so far our worst offense is having a cash bar.
    • Reply
  • Gabrielle
    Expert January 2020
    Gabrielle ·
    • Flag
    I think our two biggest offenses are no dancing and no alcohol 🤷‍♀️
    • Reply
  • Candace
    Savvy February 2020
    Candace ·
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    Scandalous!! 😂
    • Reply
  • Candace
    Savvy February 2020
    Candace ·
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    Sounds like a great party waiting to happen!
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    We had a pirate wedding! We skipped several traditions: no wedding party, no parent giving me away, no bouquet or garter toss, no DJ/dancing, we changed into pirate outfits for our reception in a cool wine cave and had pirate decor and an accordionist who played sea shanties during our cocktail hour.


    We also had a 60’s local reception where guests dressed up!
    My hubby’s 2nd wedding, my 1st. We’re 40’s/50’s so it was awesome to create the offbeat vision we wanted. 💕
    • Reply
  • Rebecca
    Master August 2019
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    We had a swordfight, fake flowers, and the theme was our baseball team.

    But, yeah, swords were involved, which isn't weird in OUR circle, but is outside of it.

    • Reply
  • Kristen
    Master November 2020
    Kristen ·
    • Flag
    Not in regards to the wedding but I'm breaking all sorts of etiquette. I have two friends that I gave proposal boxes to even though they know as of right now we may just elope us to but I'm including them and making decisions and asking their advice. My quote-unquote maid of honor I would love to be there as my witness to sign the marriage license. I'm going to have a bachelorette party and maybe a bridal brunch not because I need gifts but because my friends have told me they want to celebrate this and I want to celebrate with my girls.
    • Reply
  • Izzykern
    Super April 2021
    Izzykern ·
    • Flag
    I think we are doing a couple taboo things! Like no bridal party, NO speeches, and no kids... also my dad is not walking me down the aisle
    • Reply
  • Chrysta
    Master November 2022
    Chrysta ·
    • Flag
    I love this post!!! 💖 I Just love seeing how brides of today are bucking tradition and creating their own perfect events!
    I would say MOST of our event is nontraditional LOL Some of the highlights... I will be wearing a nontraditional wedding dress. We are having live music at the ceremony, but recorded music at the reception (no DJ or dancing, just a nice sit down plated dinner with open bar - we call this the pre-party LOL) Then an after hours party until the wee hours of the morning on Bourbon Street. Because I am not religious, we are having a non-religious Officiant marry us - an adorable lesbian with cheek piercings & colored dreads (surprise, families! lol) We are foregoing a wedding cake and opting for New Orleans rum bread putting and bananas Foster instead. But, I think the most gasp-worthy of offenses is my “maid of honor”, who will actually be a MAN of honor. Not only is he my closest and most beloved friend of over 16 years, we also dated & lived together for 5 years!
    I think half of my family is having a heart attack about this haha But hey, just because a romantic relationship didn’t work between us it doesn’t mean the friendship didn’t. My FH knows him and is 100% cool with our friendship and him standing in our wedding – as a matter of fact, he said he couldn’t have imagined me choosing anyone else.
    • Reply
  • Chanieish
    Dedicated May 2021
    Chanieish ·
    • Flag

    I'm having an expensive bachelorette for Mardi Gras. My friends are paying ~$700 to travel and stay in NoLa. I don't feel guilty at all since I forked out at least that much to attend each of their bachelorettes and its gonna be a great time with all of us hanging out. Of course if someone cannot attend for financial reasons, I will help them out/not be mad if they bail.

    • Reply
  • Ann-Marie
    Savvy July 2020
    Ann-Marie ·
    • Flag
    Cash bar, fake flowers, no wedding party, and a 16yr age difference between bride and groom 😂
    • Reply
  • KimandLarry
    Dedicated June 2021
    KimandLarry ·
    • Flag

    I guess most of what we're doing is not traditional or "proper etiquette" for a vow renewal. But I really do not care. We weren't able to have the wedding we wanted the first time around, so we're having it now! I am calling my girls bridesmaids, the guys groomsmen, and we're doing the first dance, cake cutting and other things, and we made proposal boxes for them all. We're not doing "bachelor/ette" parties, but we are planning a weekend with our parties only because our kids are standing up with us and they want us to do it. I've never really cared for nor been a traditional kind of person anyway!

    • Reply
  • Jill
    Expert April 2020
    Jill ·
    • Flag

    We are getting married in a public park on the water and then a reception at FH's parent's house. We aren't having a DJ, we are having fake flowers, and thinking about a food truck for food!

    • Reply
  • Madelyn
    Dedicated June 2020
    Madelyn ·
    • Flag
    I don’t have any dancing or alcohol 🤷🏼‍♀️ Kinda wish we had dancing but it’s in the church by laws. Since I am getting married on D Day I am also going to have a moment of silence before e ceremony begins. My family is military and the local area is a big military community.
    • Reply
  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
    • Flag
    We had a 2.5h gap between the ceremony and cocktail hour with a 30ish minute commute between venues. I don't know how guests felt about it but I know some took advantage of it to go change into more comfortable clothes for the party!
    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
    • Flag
    This sounds like our wedding. I’m not having any of those either. Additionally, we’re not doing any DIY decor and not having a Photo Booth. Our venue is a former burlesque club and we’re having one color scheme for the ceremony and a different color scheme for the reception (but it works based on the two different rooms in our venue).


    FH and I are both second time bride and groom in our 40’s. Following the crowd is not our style, so having a traditional, cookie-cutter wedding was out of the picture.
    However, the one thing that’s probably considered very “tacky“ is that 95% of our registry is for “gifts of experiences” (ie. gift cards for restaurants, movies, spas, hotels, etc.). FH and I are established in our careers and financially sound. We have our house and it’s fully stocked and furnished. So there aren’t any tangible items that we need. But we do enjoy spending time together and making memories, so that’s why we created our registry that way.
    • Reply
  • Sexypoodle
    Master October 2021
    Sexypoodle ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Oops! My post was in response to yours. We’re not having those either.
    • Reply
  • Kaitlin
    Dedicated January 2022
    Kaitlin ·
    • Flag
    We are doing destination, colored veil, mayan ceremony, colorful hair for the bride, fun colored suits for the groomsmen, no true bachelorette/bachelor parties, no rehearsal dinner, no speeches... theres probs more too🤷‍♀️
    • Reply
  • Gwendolyn
    Devoted July 2021
    Gwendolyn ·
    • Flag

    Welp, none of ours is super traditional and according to some websites we are "tacky". We are already legally married for military benefit/travel reasons (we do not refer to one another as if we were married). We did not plan on doing anything, but his mother would have been devastated. So, we are having a ceremony and dinner with only immediate family (18 people total), no dancing, no DJ, no videographer, no wedding party, etc.

    • Reply

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