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Ash
Beginner April 2023

What color should a widow wear?

Ash, on August 12, 2016 at 7:17 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 39

My first husband passed away after only 3 years of marriage. I don't wanna wear white but then again i don't know what's appropriate to wear either. Any suggestions or does anyone know the rule of thumb??

39 Comments

Latest activity by Brianna, on October 25, 2019 at 10:19 PM
  • Portlandia13
    Super April 2017
    Portlandia13 ·
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    I think you should wear whatever color you want. The more traditional color may be ivory, but honestly you should wear whatever makes you feel the most beautiful. It's your day.

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  • kiandra
    Master October 2016
    kiandra ·
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    Whatever color you feel beautiful in!!

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  • Ash
    Beginner April 2023
    Ash ·
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    Thank you ladies

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  • Smoothie
    Dedicated September 2016
    Smoothie ·
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    Ivory or soft white, but whatever you decide should be acceptable. You're still the bride! Congratulations!

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  • Rebecca
    Expert May 2017
    Rebecca ·
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    Whatever you want it's your day!

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  • Sandra M.
    Super October 2016
    Sandra M. ·
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    Ashley - I agree with the previous posters that you should whatever you feel beautiful in!

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  • OMW
    Master August 2013
    OMW ·
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    Definitely whatever you want.

    My dad died when I was a teenager, and my mom remarried many years later. She wanted a casual BBQ wedding, and she wore a floral sundress because that's exactly what she wanted to.

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  • TheHouseOfAllen
    Super October 2016
    TheHouseOfAllen ·
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    The color that makes you feel amazing as a bride!

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  • Pszab
    Super May 2017
    Pszab ·
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    I don't think you will be offending anyone by what color you wear if that's what you were going for... I agree with all previous posts

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  • Rachel DellaPorte
    Rachel DellaPorte ·
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    Ashley, life is made up of seasons. The former season has passed. You are under no obligation to wear a gown of any specific color. The color of your wedding gown should saying nothing beyond "This is a color I love". This is not the Victorian era. You do not need to wear somber, dark colors for a period of time. In fact, here's the good news -- if you have been fortunate enough to find true love again, feel free to stop in at any bridal salon and try on white, ivory, champagne, blush, pastels, or jewels tones.

    ETA: Readjust your thinking. When you are standing at the head of that aisle, you are no longer the widow of another man -- you are the soon-to-be wife of your future husband. He deserves to see you in a role that relates to his life, not the life you lived before and in the wake of your first husband's passing.

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  • SleepytheDwarf
    Master June 2017
    SleepytheDwarf ·
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    Like PPs said, you absolutely wear whatever makes you feel gorgeous.

    But... maybe choose your words a little more carefully and don't refer to your upcoming nuptials as the "first time" you will remarry. Kind of sounds like you're expecting this marriage not to last. I'm sure that's not what you meant at all, but that's one of those little phrasing things that can totally be taken the wrong way.

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  • NotThatFreakinMary
    VIP November 2016
    NotThatFreakinMary ·
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    You can wear anything! I really like blush and champagne. It seems to look good on everyone.

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  • Ali
    Master June 2017
    Ali ·
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    Whatever you want to wear that makes you feel beautiful. I am wearing the below dress.


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  • Lori
    Devoted October 2016
    Lori ·
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    Blue is a traditional second wedding dress color ( old fashioned traditional). Usually a soft blue but I'm going hard core with a Navy Blue dress for my wedding.

    Wear whatever you're comfortable in. You'll shine

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  • MrsCalderon
    VIP December 2016
    MrsCalderon ·
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    Technically you're only supposed to wear white if you're a virgin and no one follows that rule anymore. I don't really think it matters what color you wear. YOUR WEDDING YOUR RULES <3

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  • Courtney
    VIP June 2016
    Courtney ·
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    Whatever you want. If you want to wear white/ivory, add color to it. Maybe a colored belt or lace back or something. Or a dress already made with color. Or just a colored dress if that's what you wish. Honestly whatever you feel comfortable and beautiful in. (: and congrats on finding true love again

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  • RiddellMeThis
    VIP June 2016
    RiddellMeThis ·
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    I too was widowed. (And after three years!) I wore ivory this time and only because I look horrid in stark white. I think all those rules are horribly outdated IMO. Wear whatever makes you feel beautiful!

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  • Going to the chapel
    Master July 2017
    Going to the chapel ·
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    Wear whatever color you want. Definitely try on some of the wedding gowns in blush, gold, champagne, grey or wisteria.

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  • Z
    Master May 2012
    Zoe ·
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    Ashley, I would go shopping for a dress, find one you love, and that's the color you should wear.

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  • Ash
    Beginner April 2023
    Ash ·
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    I will go online and update my avatar. I had no idea you all couldn't see me picture.

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