What age are you considering to be a child?

I meant under 12 as far as food

17 and 364 days.

We are saying 21 and over as our definition of adult only.

18 and over. I do have a cousin with a 15yr old she was invited because they coming to NY from CA and they on Vacation for a few weeks but I ended up adding her as a Bridesmaid because someone dropped out

Under 18 is a child.

Surprised by the responses. Would most of you find it rude if the teenagers I used to nanny for (and still have a relationship with) are there, but your toddler wasn't invited? Glad I asked ahead of time

I see the distinction you're making here between "young adults" and little kids. I think it's reasonable to differentiate as long as you're being consistent and not splitting up families.

April, in your situation it sounds like the distinction is their relationship with you, and not their age. In that case I think you're inviting guests, not children. I wouldn't be offended. Maybe that's an UO.

Only "kids" we are inviting are my FH cousins (and the youngest is 14). All other kids, including guests children, 3rd cousins, ect, will not be invited. Originally we planned on no kids at all but then remembered that he still has young-ish cousins so that is how we made the cut-of choice. Personally it was easier to do relationship cutoffs as opposed to age just so we dont break up families.

We're doing an adults only day, so no one under 21 was invited, but that was personal preference (and an easy way to keep on track with our targeted guest count)

ETA - To your question about toddlers vs. teens, I think that'd come down to the perspective of the toddler's parents as to whether or not they decide to feel snubbed. A lot of the forum posts I've seen around kids is that its 'all or nothing' with minor exceptions for kids in the immediate family. In the long run its totally up to you.

UO: invite the kids you want to invite, just like they were adults. I think it is totally up to you, not to the parents who THINK their kids should be invited.

12 and under, in my opinion. I think the difference is that 12 and up usually behave closer to teen/adults, but under 12 does not.

If there was a case where someone had a 12 year old and an 11 year old, then there'd be an exception and I am sure you could tell them that their other child is more than welcome. However, with a 9-10 year old it'd be different, think of a 5th grader and an 8th grader... they are going to be at vastly different maturity levels.

We're doing 21 and over because of the open bar, it's the only thing that makes sense for us because 18+ will create arguments.

The only children are in the wedding ages 3-9. Then my MOH son, who is like my nephew and will be 17, looks and acts older. And he is being mailed an invitation.

We arent having kids at the wedding either, but my nephew who is 11 is coming because my sister lives out of state and can't leave him in FL alone.

Im ok with him coming because a) he's family b) he is old enough to behave himself and not make a scene at our wedding.

But other than that, we considered kids to be 16 and under. Most of our friends children are toddlers, and they are unpredictable and we wanted their parents to have a fun time and be able to let loose.

@Celia I'm not sure if I think that is good advice or just advice I want to hear, but I like it