We're going to Pre Cana tomorrow...Why am I nervous??(Update)

It's fine - you will both be FINE - I promise. FH is not Catholic either, and I think he enjoyed it as much as I did. Depending on whether you are doing the overnight weekend retreat or just the day classes, you will have someone speak about different topics of conversation within a relationship - family, sex, children, faith, money, communication, etc. After each chapter, you and FH will have to answer Q's in a booklet and then share them with each other. We loved it and it really got us talking about things we never thought to discuss before. We both learned a lot from it, so no worries - you will be fine! I promise!

@HoundMama Thanks, it's just a one day class. I made sure of it because I knew FH would not like the idea of making several trips to the church or a retreat since he's doing it for me. I hope we learn from it as well.

If it makes you feel any better, its typically a big group of couples and you won't be singled out for anything. So no hand raising or get up and talk about your life kinds of things. You can kind of sit there and discuss your answers amongst the two of you.

We did the 2 day class (but day class - not overnight retreat trip) and we just watched videos of each chapter rather than having guest speakers. We got more out of it than we had planned. Just definitely be open to it. There are some chapters that will interest you more than others - it's just important that you both try to communicate during ALL of them to get the best experience. And don't worry - like Michelle said - you won't be singled out or anything - except to maybe introduce yourselves. You don't have to share your answers with anyone other than FH.

@Michelle P Yes that makes me feel much better I dont know why I'm letting this get to me, you always hear how strict the Catholic Church can be.

That usually depends on the Parish and Priest moreso than the actual Catholic Church. I have seen priests refuse to marry couples who live together, I've seen Priests rush along wedding plans for pregnant brides with no Pre-Cana required. It just all depends. Does your priest or parish have pretty strict guidelines? Maybe that's why you're worried?

@HoundMama my priest is pretty laxed since FH and I both live together and we have a 6yr old daughter and he's not Catholic. His only restrictions was that we are not civil married which we're not. Im having just the ceremony for our wedding not the mass. I guess I was worried about being judged and finding out FH and I are not compatible LOL. I heard about that test.

Nah - it has to be pretty bad for the church to say anything - i.e. - you have to actually tell the priest that you fear for your life with your fiance, lol. We aren't doing the mass either. FH is Lutheran and he gets uncomfortable when "church" goes too far outside of what he knows - so ours will be the most Protestant Catholic Church wedding ever, lol.

Are you doing in a large group?

We did ours in a large group and we didn't have to talk to anyone. I am not going to lie I really didn't take anything from it. They talk to to about NFP (Natural Family Planning) Talked about money, and drinking and gambling and how living together couples end in divorce. OH and they teach your how to fight with each other. You do alot of "quizzes" etc. It's a REALLY REALLY long day but like I said no one found out we lived together.

Don't be nervous it's really just a day of lectures and talking about things I'm sure your FH and you already talked about.

All Smiles, I hear that test comes when you do the one on one interview with the priest. We haven't done that but I am scared because I have heard they deny couples if they don't think they are a good fit. And our first meeting isn't until June.

Our meetings and classes were very different than what we expected. We talked a lot about respecting each other, God, Sex, and the sacrament of Marriage. It was very helpful and we both felt closer after some of the assigned discussions.

Good luck tomorrow.

We did our pre-canna and it was great! FH has always been catholic and I just turned catholic, really it was no big deal, we did a 4 hour class and then it was done, the priest that did the class was cool, I have found that they really don't judge you, we have a 91 yr old priest that is gonna marry us, he knows we live together, he knows our situation, we keep no secrets from him and he is really a cool person and a good person to get to talk to...

@Soon2beMrsK yes it's a large group then we must meet with our priest after. So I'm guessing the comparability test will be given by priest 0_o

@BrevardMinister I wish we had Engaged Encounter I heard a lot of greats things about it. We went to a Guide to a Joyful Marriage which was somewhat like NFP.

@Dawn Thank you

@JC 4hrs really? Ours is 8 hrs total.

My advice to you is to go with an open mind! You guys will be talking about a lot of stuff, a lot of private, intimate stuff. My fiance and wanted to laugh most of the time with what we talked about, but it's mandatory to attend it if you want to get married in a Catholic Church. Just wait 'til you have to do NFP (Natural Family Planning) and FOCCUS test Good luck!

**UPDATE**

I just wanted to say that Pre Cana was great today. FH and I enjoyed it and learned something's about ourselves even though we've been living together it actually opened our eyes on what we expect from each other. We have gained some pointers and plan on using them in our marriage and our lives. Most importantly we plan on keeping GOD first!

I am so glad you enjoyed it!

@Jenn D we sure did

Glad it went well All Smiles. I was in the same boat as SoontoBeMrsK where we didn't take too much from it. One more thing you can check off your list though!

Like the others said it really depends on your priest and parish. I know a few that went through it( with one not being Catholic). It will be something nice for you two to build on. My fh and I loved our pre cana. As long as you both are open and honest it works great. Don't worry it will work out great

Michelle, I'm glad that I am not alone in not taking too much away from it.

I think because they shoved so much at us with limited breaks it was just TOO Much and the discussions we had and had to have with each other were things we already talked about.

But I am so glad you and FH had great time Smiles! And best part it's over and you never have to do it again!