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Wedding invitation wording

Ostrichfeather, on March 6, 2022 at 9:48 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 9

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We’ll be shopping for invitations soon and how we’ll word them has been haunting me! When we first began planning our wedding, we budgeted for a wedding we knew we’d feel comfortable paying for. My fiancé’s parents have always been extremely generous and supportive of us, and they insisted on giving us about a third of our budget even when we said no! My parents on the other hand have not been as involved or excited. My parents surprised me with about a third of the cost of my wedding dress which was nice of them and I honestly didn’t expect it. It’s not like they don’t have the means, they just aren’t that into me or my happiness, and aren’t happy together (separate story). We never expected anyone to do anything anyway, anything is generous. So anyway. We’re not really big on the whole wedding invitations basically spelling out who is paying, but we are really unsure how to word the invitations. Any ideas? We are leaning toward a wording of just us hosting or maybe “together with their parents” but we would want to discuss with his parents first. What do you guys think?!

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Latest activity by Michelle, on March 7, 2022 at 1:31 PM

VIP May 2022
Jasmine S. · on March 6, 2022 at 9:56 PM
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Our parents are each contributing, but his parents especially felt strongly that all their names should be included no matter who's paying what. I don't think you need to base it on who's contributing the most. Guests don't need to know that anyway. You can talk to your families and ask if they're OK with the "Together with their families" wording or maybe something else.
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Savvy May 2022
Altman · on March 6, 2022 at 10:30 PM
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I wasn’t concerned with wording I guess because we’re paying for our own wedding. If you don’t want extra guests though I do advise you put that on the rsvp bc I had a guest decide that they should add plus TWO … the kicker is they didn’t put their name on the card or return envelope either 🤦🏽‍♀️
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Ostrichfeather · on March 7, 2022 at 10:51 AM
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Yeah, I think this is going to be the best option. “Together with their families” is polite and inclusive, we’ll discuss it with our families. I guess I just don’t want to have his parents feel funny cause they know they contributed a lot more than my parents did. Maybe I’m the only one who feels funny about that, since we still paid for the majority of it! Lol. I appreciate your reply!
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Ostrichfeather · on March 7, 2022 at 10:55 AM
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Wow that is really something! I definitely have thought about that. We are going to do online RSVPs where ppl can only select their name and/or 1 guest from the drop down, and hope that no one decides to just bring someone who wasn’t invited. Beyond that I guess it’s out of our control. Lol. Fingers crossed!!
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Super October 2022
Jessi · on March 7, 2022 at 11:14 AM
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We're paying for the majority of our wedding, and my parents are contributing about double what my fiancé's parents plan to. We made it pretty clear when they offered to contribute that while we appreciate their contributions, no one is going to get special treatment for paying or how much they pay. Because of this, we put "Together with their families" on our invitation.
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Ostrichfeather · on March 7, 2022 at 11:20 AM
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THAT was great thinking! And I am certain that my fiancé or his family wouldn’t care at all about the wording, it’s just my perception. I guess it’s the “together with our families” thing that bothers me because my parents didn’t really contribute or be very supportive and don’t plan to. But at the same time I cannot fathom wording it as if his parents are hosting or that we’re hosting with just his parents. So “together with their families” is probably best. Thx for your reply!!
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Savvy May 2023
Heather · on March 7, 2022 at 12:20 PM
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I mean, even if your family isn’t contributing much, the contributes a little and they’ll be there to support you, right? So it’s “together” with your families. Right?
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Super August 2022
Samantha · on March 7, 2022 at 1:08 PM
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We left off parents' names completely and just said "Samantha and Lucas request the pleasure of your company at their wedding". That's a pretty common way to go in more modern weddings, regardless of who is paying, so that's always an option if you'd like to just eliminate any potential awkwardness.
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VIP August 2021
Michelle · on March 7, 2022 at 1:31 PM
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Could his parents have a preference on the invites? My parents specifically wanted us to list my groom's parents although they are not as wedding-minded or were financially involved. We chose to name both sets of parents at the top [x with y invite you to the wedding celebration of a and b], and introduced them both at the reception. But, really no adult doesn't pay for his/her own wedding these days, so nitpicking hosts is a bit outdated.
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Wedding invitation wording

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