Wedding Guest Related: Black Tie Optional

I agree with M and Celia - the above photo is far too casual for black tie optional. I would do floor length or sparkly/glitzy short w/ jewelry like others suggested.

Ugh. This is why made up dress codes piss me off so much. Black tie optional just means the hosts want their guests to look fancy but don't want to shell out for an actual black tie event and their guests aren't forced to rent a tux if they're not used to it.

I agree that the picture Bookcase posted is probably a little too casual--that's along the lines of what I wear to most weddings. Honestly, I'd take your cues more from the event and the people hosting it than from "black tie optional"--is the venue super fancy? Is it an evening affair? Are the invitations really fancy? Are the people hosting it more accustomed to dressing up (check out their facebook pictures for past events)? If yes to the above, I'd rent a long gown. But if it's a less fancy venue and invitations and they're more casual people, you can definitely go with a cocktail dress.

Everyone is hating on Bookcase but she is the only one who gave me a photo! Lol.

Based on the comments I definitely need to step it up from what I was thinking though. To @Lori's point, I do think this wedding will be "an actual black tie event" - it is at the Chicago Cultural Center and even the rehearsal dinner is fairly formal. So in this case I don't mind that they included the dress code. I think the optional thing is more for the guests' convenience.

I will look into RTR...though I do have a Nordstrom Rack nearby so if I can find something there for under $100 that would be preferable.

Haha I love the dresses in Bookcases photo, but I would wear those to a standard wedding. My wedding is pretty much the "fanciest" most of my guests have been to and even that's not black tie optional, so I don't know!

I just know I always get a million compliments on my RTR dresses and accessories, and am usually on the overdressed side of most of the guests. Also, I hope this doesn't make me sound like a pretentious ass, I just went to one event once underdressed and I was mortified so I try not to make that mistake again.

I just looked under the black tie section on RTR and there's no short dresses. Lol yea length or the kind where it's shorter in the front and long in the back, but no cocktail dresses! Definitely some cute ones on RTR!!

Okay, I will help you because I love this stuff and I love shopping. If I were you I would answer these questions:

What is the venue type?

How long is the wedding expected to last?

This is the venue: http://www.cityofchicago.org/city/en/depts/dca/supp_info/chicago_culturalcenter.html

Not sure about the length but it is an evening event.

I would wear a long dress to a black tie optional. But I like to dress up so that might just be me.

ETA: I bought a long gown at Dress Barn for $29 the day of the wedding that I went to February. I am 6' tall and it fit perfectly. You can find something cheap on clearance.

No one's hating, it's just way too casual - I used to wear dresses like that to be a waitress in, lol, and I was doing hard physical labor, so no, I would not consider it appropriate.

However, you'er right, the problem is they totally made up this dress code. However, I still think it's worth getting more dressy for - if it were "black tie optional" work event, I'd say cocktail dress, but for a wedding, kick it up a notch! Obviously take into consideration the venue as well.

For pictures, attached are what I would consider "black tie optional".

Holy hell, based on the venue, please wear a gown. I would kill to wear a gown and stand on those stairs!

Oh, the wedding is in the Chicago, fabulous! I would go for an amazing gown def based on the venue. you might find some from prom clearance? That might be too young and perhaps too late for those sales. I really wanted to have a black tie wedding but I knew my family wouldn't actually follow through so we ditched that idea.

All this debate is why we're going with casual, no holes, no t-shirts. LOL Its Jul and outside, we want our guests to be comfortable. We'll be dressed up, but guests don't have to be if they don't want to.

I wore a formal cocktail dress with open/low back and had my hair done in an updo. I'm short so I have a very hard time finding long dresses lol

I agree with the photo that m just posted about. That is spot on, to me.

Ugh you're right m. The more I look at the venue...plus it would be fun to wear a gown. If I can find one that's reasonably priced!

Amazing venue! Definitely go long.

I was just getting ready to ask you if this wedding is in Chicago and saw your comment. My friend was just asking me the same thing...what is black tie optional? She is going to a black tie optional in Chicago on Labor Day weekend also lol I wonder if it's the same people???

OMG JCC... What are the couples initials? Mine are A and C.

ETA: At the Cultural Center or just Chicago in general? I imagine lots of weddings are happening on Labor Day weekend

Black tie to me is a gowns and tuxes or at least a fancy black cocktail dress depending on the venue. That venue and it being an evening wedding screams gown to me. I don't like dress codes because everyone can have a different idea of what the dress code means.