Wedding Gaps and Cocktail hour

Wondering... why does the ceremony have to start at 1 pm with no exceptions?

I personally strongly dislike gaps. I've been to three weddings with gaps that were 3 hours or longer and it's just exhausting. Even if our house was near the venue, it's so tiring having to go back home, while we sit in our wedding attire, and while hangry. This is just from personal experience.

I actually skipped the ceremony for a wedding we were invited to in April... the ceremony started at 1 pm and the cocktail hour started at 6. It was ridiculous. My house was 40 minutes away from the venue too.

You'll have enough time for pictures, that's for sure. But I'm not sure if it's beneficial to have your guests wait for you... unless you planned something specifically for them to do (and you'd need to cover those costs).

I'm also wondering why there's no exceptions on the time of the ceremony.

Anyway, to answer your question, that will be plenty of time and I can see you and your bridal party sitting around with nothing to do. Most people, even without a first look, are able to get pictures done in an hour. Unless you have an unusually large amount of shots on your shot list, you will have time and then some.

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I'm invited to a wedding in November. We live an hour away from the place, so we aren't getting a hotel. She has a 3 hour gap too and I'm like uh, what do we do? I mean, we could go to a bar for three hours but that's not exactly what I want to do, I know FH and I will get bored.

And it's November in Michigan so it's not like we can go out and walk or anything, it'll be cold!

Catholic Churches have strict schedules because they have reconciliation and evening masses on Saturdays. It is common to have gaps between events with religious and cultural weddings. For my daughter's wedding a week from Saturday, we are hosting light refreshments back at the house during her 2 1/2 hour gap. Her mass also starts at 1 and cocktail hour starts at 4:30. Guests will have time to check into their hotel rooms, freshen up, and stop by for snacks before the reception. Those not staying in hotels can come straight to the house. The wedding party will be doing photos during that time around town. They plan to attend at least 1/2 of the cocktail hour but will do a traditional intro announcement at the beginning of dinner once all guests are seated. My other daughter has a 2:00 mass time (different church) and also a 4:30 cocktail hour. They will be announced into the reception during the cocktail hour. Maybe you can be announced during cocktail hour as well, or perhaps show up in your ceremony gown then change into your other dress for a grand entrance before dinner.

If you're done with picture by 5 then why even have a cocktail hr just jump right into the reception?

Gaps are rude. A wedding is a single event that has two parts, the ceremony and the reception. You wouldn't invite people for a party at your home and send people off for hours during the event, would you?

Pictures 11-12:30
Ceremony 1-2
Recieving line 2-2:30
Travel time to reception (taking a guess here) 2:30-3
Cocktail hour (pictures) 3-4
Introductions/dinner/dancing/etc 4-8 or 9
After party (if important to keep the party going until late) 8 or 9-11 or 12

Gaps are common with Catholic ceremonies. The ones I've been to with evening receptions I've made work. For example, the last one we traveled about an hour and a half to and weren't staying so we didn't have a hotel room. We found the nearest bar and went there to hang out for a bit. Honestly, the time flies by.

Go to your cocktail hour and take that time to greet and talk to many of your guests. You will find that the reception goes by quickly and being able to talk to your guests beforehand then allows you to enjoy more of the party you paid for. You can still do an introduction at the reception.

Hi Dana, Welcome to WeddingWire and congrats on your engagement!

This makes sense.

You have some options here, if you don't want as big of a gap. Starting cocktail hour sooner if it's possible with your venue is an option, that way you can arrive to cocktail hour after your pictures and in your dress make an entrance at the reception.

Have you talked to your venue yet about their flexibility with cocktail hour start time?

I wish people would stop saying this is common with Catholic weddings. This is a highly regional/social circle thing. I’ve been to well over a dozen Catholic weddings and only one had a gap and everyone talked about how much it stunk that we couldn’t just go to the reception.

I’ve never been to a Catholic wedding with a gap...

I’d probably skip the cocktail hour. You’ll have all your pictures done during the gap. Just have the reception start at 5pm. Or have the cocktail hour start earlier.

I’d rethink the 3-hour gap unless you’re ok with some people missing the ceremony or reception. Start cocktail hour immediately after the ceremony, you can take family photos then if you must. You can arrive in your new gown or wait then switch before the first dance or cake.

View Quoted Comment So much this. My husband and I almost didn't return for the reception for the one Catholic wedding with a gap we attended. The kids were at the grandparents, we had hours to burn, the clothes came off, and well ordering a pizza and eating it in bed sounded so much better. We did return and the slow trickle back was pretty embarrassing. Dinner was delayed an hour or so until they had enough guests there. Add in the complaining about the gap and that pizza just seemed like a missed opportunity.

OP I don't quite see a question here, once you're done with pictures, switch dresses and make your grand entrance. You can coordinate with the DJ to possibly do it halfway through cocktail hour so you can change and freshen up.

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You can just go to the reception. You might be invited to both parts of the celebration but you can certainly chose to attend only one. It is quite common where I'm from. I'm pretty sure I've never been to a catholic ceremony without a gap.

View Quoted Comment I’ve been to them both ways and completely understand when it works out that way. If someone chooses to have their ceremony in their church and their church follows those guidelines there really is not another way around it. Especially if someone is faithful to a specific church. I always attend both and am an adult and can entertain myself. I’m there to support the couple and if that’s how their wedding works out then I’m still there to support them. If someone is that bothered by it, like you said, they have the choice to only attend one part.