Wedding band.. As a Christmas gift?

Our wedding is in March and money is tight so id be happy to get that as a Christmas present. I can see where you're coming from though.

I'd have been happy with my wedding band. My fiancé & I don't ever exchange Christmas gifts. It's both our money so we typically just like to go do something together

It depends on your budget. We don't do really huge Christmas gifts, we usually say $100 budget for each of us so we don't go overboard (I usually get him clothes and maybe something fun), plus my bday is right before and I always love getting "experiences" as a gift so I usually hint at a show or something I want to do around the holidays (this year I hinted that I would love to see the Nutcracker, it's been so long since I have and I love it so much! I mentioned it once so I hope he wants to go too and get us tickets).

Anyway, I don't think you are being a brat. If you don't want that as a Christmas gift, just tell him so. We went and picked out his and my band together, and then I paid for his and he paid for mine. I think we said they were Valentine's Day gifts or something, we always make up a reason to get the things we need or want. But you are not a brat, tell him how you feel!

I don't see anything wrong with that. I consider our wedding expenses, rings included, separate from things like gifts. I'd be pretty upset if DF was trying to roll them together, because I put a LOT of thought into gifts I get him.

MNA thats exactly where I'm coming from, I'm a very sentimental person and put a lot of thought into gifts. But I also know FH is more practical than emotional so that's what makes sense to him.

I'm kind of over it now, but i got a little upset when it first came up. I just don't want my reaction to be "thanks for this ring you were going to have to get for me anyway that I can't even wear for a year" I'm terrible at masking expressions, I don't want to hurt his feelings.

ETA I feel like I should add I've been wanting to get him a personalized hi-vis jacket for Christmas anyway, he just happened to want one and pointed out his preferences, so I'm not just getting him something he asked for

I see where you're coming from. My birthday just happened and he kept joking "I just bought you a wedding band, does that count as your birthday gift". (I picked my own wedding band out). He had already purchased a birthday gift for me but I didn't know. I just laughed when he'd say it but I was hoping I'd still get something picked out for my birthday by him! But either way I would have been happy.

My FH is very similar to yours in that he isn't very good at coming up with sentimental gifts. I see where you're coming from, and plus..you won't even wear it for a couple years anyways, so no, I wouldn't want a wedding band as a Christmas gift.

Can he not order his jacket through his station? Idk how it works everywhere, but FH gets a stipend for gear every year or whatever to replace worn/old gear. This is how it works at his city job, and his former township firefighting jobs.

Well- Cash gifts between my FH and me would be weird since we share a bank account.. so that doesn't even feel like an appropriate choice.. but-

Idk- I mean, it's nice that it'd already be purchased but it just doesn't seem like a Christmas gift?

Especially since it'll be like 4 more month til the wedding. Plus- you guys have to buy it anyways.. make him buy you something different for Christmas haha

Well- Cash gifts between my FH and me would be weird since we share a bank account.. so that doesn't even feel like an appropriate choice.. but-

Idk- I mean, it's nice that it'd already be purchased but it just doesn't seem like a Christmas gift?

Especially since it'll be like 4 more month til the wedding. Plus- you guys have to buy it anyways.. make him buy you something different for Christmas haha

@Mrs. Jones he is on a small town, county wide volunteer department, they only get new gear every few (7-10) years (unless they have a shortage) and it belongs to the dept, so if they quit they have to turn it in or get fined.

This would be his own for him to keep with his name on it, and honestly nicer than the stuff his dept issues

My birthday is next week and I asked for no gifts from FH due to wedding costs. Kinda regretting being practical now

We plan to do our wedding bands as Valentine's Day gifts because that will be about the time we should be looking. It does seem kinda lame, but we are trying hard to save for the wedding, so I understand. In your situation, it seems like it would be more fair if you were both getting that for each other for Christmas, instead of him getting a gift and you getting your wedding band. I definitely understand how you feel!!

@Chip gotcha!! Just thought I'd throw that out there. Yeah, one of his prior township depts had awfully old gear, but every once in a while they'd let him order something, lol

tell that son of a gun to send you to the spa for Christmas!

Maybe that could be next year's Christmas present since you aren't getting married until March 2018. If you aren't giving him hints or don't have any idea what you want yourself, he's probably going with practical and something that will have to be bought anyways. I know I wouldn't want it as my gift since it is something that has to be purchased anyway but I would also know I couldn't get upset about it if I hadn't given him any ideas on what I would like.

@Michelle I know I need to give him ideas, but I honestly haven't even thought about Christmas yet.

Guess I need to get on it

I think that's fine if you're fine with it

If you're gifting each other at Christmas, no, rings or anything wedding related should not be a "gift". If you decide together to skip Christmas gifting and focus your money on wedding expenses, that's fine.

I think for you it would make more sense in 2017.

I brought up the idea of us buying each other rings on Black Friday and gifting them for Christmas so we can save money on gifts. My fiance thought it was a good idea. Then again, there's nothing that we really want. I had enough trouble trying to get ideas for his birthday in September.

I'm with you, Chip. That would be a weird gift, since it's already an assumed part of the wedding. Since it's not what you want, and you don't want his 'fallback' of gift cards or cash, I suggest you start poking around some websites and creating a wishlist he can shop from. Maybe you want new lingerie, a new book, rollerblades, skis-- whatever coincides with your hobby?

Well, it beats the replacement tail light I got one year after I backed into a light pole. Hubby will never make that mistake again. Hahahah

FH and I bought each other's rings, sort of, since they both cost exactly the same. It's not like we weren't going to buy wedding bands, so I would have a hard time wanting to do them as a regular gift.