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samantha
Beginner October 2019

Walking down the aisle song

samantha , on April 10, 2019 at 12:03 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 1 13
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Hey guys so I am having so much trouble with picking my walking down the aisle song. I found the song that I absolutely loved, cried a little when I heard it and knew this was the song I wanted and could see myself walking down the aisle to. The song is L.O.V.E by Nat King Cole. So the problem is my parents. The first argument they started was that it was a bad choice, and their excuses were oh no people are not going to be paying attention to you walking down the aisle when you have a vocalist and two other musicians playing the song while you walk down the aisle, the second was that people are going to be paying more attention to the musicians because they are going to be comparing the singers voice to Nat King Cole's and it won't sound the same ( its not Nat King Cole so no its not going to sound the same I don't think people will be mad or care if it does or doesn't), the third was all their friends said that's not what you are supposed to do. So finally after some argument I said fine lets compromise we can have the DJ pipe in the music for the entrance and exit songs, entrance song L.O.V.E and the exit song is This Will Be An Everlasting Love by Natalie Cole. And they agreed upon that, and said good they are happy and proud of me for compromising. So as couple of weeks go by after we had agreed upon having the DJ pipe in the two songs for the entrance and exit songs, and now they are bringing it back up arguing that's just what isn't done, we don't want you to play that song and you may not walk down the aisle to that song, reasons now are somewhat similar to that of the last, except this time they are like no one is going to be listening to you, umm I am not talking while walking down the aisle and the song stops when the ceremony starts, second oh its going to be embarrassing to us if you have a vocalist singing while you walk down the aisle, and its just not done and its not appropriate. And then they tell me if that's what you choose for your song then you can pay for the wedding. Which I am helping out a lot of paying for things. They are paying for the wedding and understand they have much say in it, but that's if the flowers are too expensive, or we can't have an afterparty or expense wise I can understand if they say no or ask me to choose something else because of expense which I will. But I don't think they should have a say in our song choices if their is no difference in costs, which there isn't. Its been really upsetting, its my special day and I love this song and how it sounds with the vocals. It doesn't cost more or less to pick that song to walk down the aisle to. So I guess I am asking has anyone ever been to a wedding that has had a dj pipe in song with vocals? Or been to a wedding that has had just acoustics for L.O.V.E by Nat King Cole? Any advice on how to handle these overbearing parents?

13 Comments

Latest activity by Aurora, on August 12, 2019 at 4:55 PM
  • Mandy
    VIP May 2019
    Mandy ·
    • Flag

    My bridal party is walking into music with lyrics. I'm also walking into music with lyrics. The reason I picked the songs were because of the lyrics so I want them heard. I don't think it will take away from me walking down the aisle because it's not like it's going to be on max volume.

    I'd tell them you tried to compromise but they still want it their way when it is your wedding. You don't want to walk down the aisle to something you don't like as that's one of the biggest moments you'll have.

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  • G
    Dedicated November 2021
    Gabriela ·
    • Flag

    Did they give you any other feedback about the song? Do they think it's too fast or upbeat? Maybe look for a cover that's slowed down or an acoustic arrangement of it where it's the words you want but gives it a different feel. I'm sorry they are giving you such a hard time about the song. I haven't heard it used in this form but that's not to say it can't and shouldn't be done. It's a beautiful song and totally embodies the moment you are trying to create. I am sorry this is causing so much turmoil, I hope it works out! Smiley love

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  • M
    Just Said Yes November 2019
    Marisela ·
    • Flag
    I’ll say for you to sit down and talk to your parents, and explain that is the most special day of your life! Tell them you would like to choose what song you want, without feeling like you did the wrong thing just because they’re paying for it! I’m sorry your going through this, I’ll if they don’t agree you should still choose whatever you want and makes you happy! It’s their money but not their wedding!
    • Reply
  • Abby
    VIP March 2019
    Abby ·
    • Flag
    It doesn't matter if a song has lyrics or not, everyone's attention will be on the bride! I'm so sorry they are giving you a hard time about this. I absolutely loves the song I picked for my wedding and I'll always remember it! Please don't compromise too much and just go with the wing that you love! Song choice has nothing to do with money so they shouldn't have any say about that and if they really threaten to stop funding the wedding literally over a song choice then that's horrible parenting imo.
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    VIP June 2020
    Jessica ·
    • Flag

    I feel like there is a legit reason they don't want you to walk to this song and they are just not telling you. I would sit down with them and be honest. Ask them exactly why they don't want the song for you and if there is a legit reason then change it, if not, I would tell them that that is the song you are using and it should not effect anything to do with the wedding (money being given or anything else).

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  • Danielle
    Master June 2019
    Danielle ·
    • Flag

    Ummm...I plan to walk down the aisle to "At Last" by Etta James. The DJ will be playing it, and it will have vocals. Your parents are odd to me. My mom's biggest thing was she wanted me to walk to the traditional bridal march, but that is not my style. I am paying for my wedding, so she doesn't really have a say regardless, but she just made her "face" when I told her my choice, and let it go. That's a shame your parents can't let you have the song you want. I am sorry they are being that way. It's GREAT when parents pay for a wedding, but one of the things I am thankful for with paying for my own is that I can do whatever I want. Hope it all works out for you and they learn to let you have your special day the way you want it! Maybe if you explain to them how they are making you feel, and that they should let you have YOUR wedding the way you want....probably wouldn't hurt to shed a few tears to pull on their heart strings a little lol....they might be more understanding and reasonable.

    • Reply
  • Mrs. S
    Master November 2019
    Mrs. S ·
    • Flag
    Pick the song you want. I don’t think they should get a say in that.
    • Reply
  • Cristy
    Master May 2021
    Cristy ·
    • Flag

    Yeah, I agree with PPs here. They are paying for the wedding, so they should have some say, but I've never heard of parents threatening to withdraw their money over a song!!

    First, my bridal party and me are walking down the aisle to a song with lyrics--and not an instrumental version of that song, but the actual song, as recorded, by the original artist. It's my opinion that it doesn't really matter what song you walk to, the guests' attention will be focused on you, as you are the bride!!! None of your guests will be bothered by the song you choose. They may not agree with your choice, but most people would respect the fact that it is your choice, and none of their business. Are your parents really going to make such a big deal over an aspect of the wedding that will be over in just a few minutes? Even if you're getting married in a grand cathedral, the walk down the aisle is not that long. So they'll only have to hear the song for a few minutes.

    Maybe you ought to show your parents some of the responses you're receiving here, as it seems most of us agree with you, and think your parents are being ridiculous.

    Not everyone in your life is going to have the same vision for your wedding that you have. But the point is that it's your wedding, and only your vision and FHs vision for that day matters. Remind your parents that they had their wedding already, their vision, their day. It's your turn now.

    • Reply
  • Keyona
    Devoted August 2020
    Keyona ·
    • Flag

    I have a friend that got married last year to a song with vocals and it was beautiful. It didn't take away from her at all but in my opinion enhanced the entire ceremony. I thought it was beautiful - i plan to have someone sing at my wedding when i walk so i don't think it

    will take away at all. I agree with everyone else that you should talk to your parents about it and see what the true reason is and possibly explain your vision. I mean it is your wedding, your happiness regardless if they are paying or not.
















































    • Reply
  • aimee
    Savvy October 2020
    aimee ·
    • Flag

    I was in a wedding a few weeks ago and both the bride and bridal party walked in to a song with vocals. To be honest I couldn't even tell you what song it was as I was focused on not tripping and then focused on the bride. I actually knew the song because I was singing the words before I walked out, but can't remember now as it wasn't the important part. All i remember was the groom's face and how great the bride looked. It's your special day! If you and your fiance agree on it, then your parents should compromise. I agree on respecting their wishes especially if they are helping with expenses, but they may need to reevaluate and remember that it is you and your fiance getting married and your special day.

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  • Lauren
    Devoted October 2019
    Lauren ·
    • Flag
    That’s honestly one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard in my entire life, I think every single wedding I’ve ever been to more than half of them are walking down the aisle song has had vocals… Your parents are being kind of ridiculous pick whatever song you want
    • Reply
  • Alexa
    Savvy November 2020
    Alexa ·
    • Flag

    This is insane. Your song choice is really that big of a deal to them? Remind them they had their day and now it is your turn. If you let them hover over you and dictate all of your decisions you may look back at your wedding day with regrets. As parents, they should want whatever makes you happiest.

    • Reply
  • Aurora
    Dedicated July 2020
    Aurora ·
    • Flag

    We are walking down the aisle to song with lyrics (acoustic guitar and vocals) and so is the wedding party and this is on purpose as well for the meaning of the lyrics. It might be different and that might be their reaction to something new or they haven't heard of, but it seems like a fair amount of people on this forum have done it or are doing it. Just go for it, but you can tell them how it made you feel when they were not supporting your decision, and why it's important you have a song that you love while you walk down the aisle.

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