Vows for older step chiildren to be...

I guess it depends on your family dynamics.


With ours, I didn't want our actual vows to include my child. She's eight and I don't want her to feel any responsibility for my marriage. I did write into the ceremony that we were creating a new family with her..that way she was included. We both wrote a little something to say to each other before the vows and he included that he was looking forward to continue being there for my daughter and me.

Have you asked your future step-sons if they would like to be included in your vows? I know I wouldn't have wanted to be in my own parents' second marriages. They are all old enough (even the 13-y-o) to have a say. If they do want to be included, I would follow Sara's advice and not actually say vows to them. Marriage vows aren't for children.

Hey there, Michelle! Have you spoken with your FH? Is he onboard with including them in the vows? How do the boys feel about it?

As Sara mentioned, you could have something written in to the ceremony and/or your vows about the family you're creating.