First I want to apologize. I KNOW everyone is so tired of hearing about COVID-19, but I need to vent somewhere that people will relate.
Our wedding was supposed to be on April 25th. This date was picked 3.5 years ago. It was my father's birthday and he passed when I was 8. This date was my way of making a sad day a happy one, of including him in our marriage. Now this.
Things are BLOWING UP with our venue. They are an older couple who run the venue on their farm. They have been wonderful for every bride to be married at their venue, clear up until now. When the Gov. placed a ban of gatherings over 50 people, the bride getting married 3 weeks before us reached out to them asking to cancel or reschedule. They flat out refused. They stated that since they weren't actually refusing to have the wedding, they were not required to refund. By contract they only refund 80% and that is ONLY if someone else books that day. They also stated that they could not reschedule as they are booked 1.5 years at this point. The bride and her family and friends took to Facebook, the newspaper, and the local public radio. I opted not to get involved. I hoped that within a day or 2, especially with the talk of city shut downs, lower group gathering limits, and maybe just some general human decency, they would change their stance. As of today their FB account and all internet presence of the venue have been shut down.
Another venue in the area made a post 2 days ago that they were offering all available wedding dates to couples who've had to cancel their weddings due to COVID-19 at a deposit fee that would be returned to them after the wedding. I sent them an email as they originally weren't an option for us due to their preferred catering list. I explained to them that my mother was the one catering for us as I have many allergies and have a very hard time trusting my health to caterers. I haven't heard back from them yet, but I am hoping they provide a good solution to the venue part of the problem because it looks like we are going to be out a good chunk of change for the venue (which also included the non alcoholic drinks, glassware, tables/linen, china, popcorn machine, ice cream, and a lot of decorations).
On top of all of the venue stuff, we are facing rescheduling our honeymoon to Jamaica. We are (luckily) both still working as he is a cook and they are still open for delivery and curbside, and I am a healthcare professional. I am slammed at work facing all the clinic side problems that this pandemic is bringing forth, we were also finishing a clinic move, and department merge of 3 departments that do not get along with each other. Work is stressful, home is stressful, and I know that I am not alone in this, and I recognize that everyone is stressed and have their own problems right now. I just feel so overwhelmed and I swing wildly from being mad that people are minimizing my feelings in all of this, to feeling like the biggest baby for making this all about me in a time of world wide crisis.
We have decided to do a private ceremony on 4/25 with just essential people, and reschedule the 300 person wedding we had planned to a later date. Last night I had to break the news to our officiant who got his license just for this moment. He is 80 years old, on oxygen, and not doing well as it is. I told him that I cannot allow him to marry us on the 25th because I could never live with myself if he were to get sick after. I love him too much for that.
I am doing better today at not crying. I have passed the sad stage and have reached anger. Now I am noticing I am more sensitive to the stupid things at work and my FMIL really upset me at lunch today. She called to ask what the progress was on wedding things. I told her that we applied for our marriage license online yesterday and our plans will change as needed at this point. She proceeded to berate me about how it isn't fair to HER and HER FRIENDS because this is her baby boy's wedding and she just doesn't know how to tell her friends that they can't come to the REAL wedding. No acknowledgement of how hard this is on me or him, or even my parents who have helped us pay for the whole thing and now have lost a lot of money.
I am just mentally and physically exhausted at this point, as I am sure many of you guys are as well.
