Using both maiden and married names?

Why don't you just keep your maiden name? It doesn't make you less married. You don't have to change it and you listed a ton of reasons why you should keep it.

Is it possible to keep your maiden name as just a stage name? And have ur FHs name as your legal name?

You can totally change your name legally but for performances use your maiden name! A lot of actresses and other celebrities do that!

You can always just keep your maiden name, but introduce yourself socially as Mrs. FH.

Or, you can legally take his, and make your stage name your maiden name. It's different when your career doesn't allow for a "stage" name. Plenty of celebrities (and even book authors) go by a name other than their legal one:

http://thoughtcatalog.com/nico-lang/2013/08/55-celebrities-whose-real-names-will-surprise-you/

I have had the same last name since I got married 19 years ago. 16 of those I have used that name professionally. I so want to ditch my former husband's name but I can't professionally. I plan to take my FH's name in all of life but at work. I hope I don't feel schizophrenic because of this decision.

You can always keep your name, and use his name socially.

I don't have any real advice for you, but my FMIL decided to keep her maiden name and add FFIL's last name so she has two, and it's been an ongoing problem for her. Often computer programs don't have the option to have two last names, so it can be difficult for insurance and other companies to get your name correct. It seems that it can be even more of a hassle than a hyphenated last name.

I think that if you really want to take his last name you should do it. And as everyone else has said, use yours as a stage name.

OP, I'm pretty sure it's possible to make both legal last names, but I don't actually know the procedure.

@Anne: Your schizophrenia comment was incredibly uncalled for an offensive. Making light of such a serious mental illness isn't cute or funny. That's like people claiming they're "OCD" for being perfectionists, while people actually legitimately suffer with debilitating OCD. Making light of mental illness is so wrong is so many different ways.

I was also struggling with this decision. I'm a musical theatre singer/actor/dancer, and I have over a decade's worth of stage credits, a website, connections, union stuff, etc linked to my maiden name, too. Like some PPs suggested, I'm legally changing my name, but will still use my maiden name professionally. Although, sometimes I want to change my stage name, too. ...I have a very tricky German last name, and FH's last name is so delightfully easy. after 30 years of spelling my name constantly and correcting pronunciation repeatedly, I would love to throw in the towel altogether, lol. But I feel like that would throw a little wrench in the cogs of my career machine, haha. I understand your plight!!