Unity Ceremonies - What is everyone doing?

@MrsVoegs17 Yeah I guess like PPs have stated I already feel like the ceremony itself is all about unity so maybe that's why it's feeling forced to me and possibly why we're drawn to a community option.

Nothing ... not necessary.

I started singing at weddings almost 15 years ago. Some of the things I've seen have bordered on the ridiculous.

Were going to have a tree in a pot and jars filled with dirt to put into the pot.

@Dreamer , hopefully you don't think this idea is ridiculous? The reason we are choosing to do this is because we will not saying vows, other than "I give you this ring as a daily reminder of my love for you". FH does not want to speak a lot in front of everyone, the entire ceremony gives him anxiety. Our ceremony as we've planned it would be about 5 minutes from start to finish, so we are adding this in place of/addition to vows to make it a little longer and a little more personal to the two of us.

@Jennifer, love that idea.

I think we are doing a wine mixing ceremony thing (Not sure what the exact name is). We are going to mix two different wines in a glass then each take a sip. I've seen it done with beer as well.

I could have sworn I posted this already! Apparently I am losing my mind lol. We are doing a unity ceremony with Unity in Glass (unityinglass.com). They send you glass pieces in whatever colors you want, and you mix them together during the ceremony like you would sand. Then you send it back to them and they turn it into a gorgeous glass sculpture or glass bowl (and I think there are even more options). It's pretty expensive ($500 for the standard glass sculpture) but I think it's worth it. It's more of an item you'd put on display in your house (I think) and will hold together perfectly as opposed to sand which when moved around can go from color layers to just being mixed together, which may be what some people are going for but IDK. your idea is cool too, I've heard of that before and liked it.

Sorry couldn't figure out how to add this in an ETA for my post. This is the glass sculpture we will be getting, in white and green.

You can replicate Unity in Glass for much less if you DIY.

Five minutes for a ceremony? That's kind of an insult to your guests. They are coming to your ceremony because they expect to see one, to witness your commitment to each other. That can't be done in five minutes.

We're doing a hand-fasting ceremony as my nordic/scandinavian and his irish heritage both included hand-fasting traditionally in weddings. we are having an outdoor ceremony as well, and wanted to do something a bit more unique than a candle or sand. I love the glass idea though that sounds like a lot of fun if you get to go blow it yourself and it's something to hold onto forever.

Celia, any recommendations of where we can DIY. We love the glass idea, but it was so expensive when I looked into it! Not in our budget.

We doing sand

@melissa K- unity glass is very expensive. Did you look into any local places? We found one in St.Louis (where I am getting married) which is cheaper. It's still not cheap but total we are going to be at 375. Instead of the 500+ on the website.

Bullseye glass for the frit. Less than 10 bucks a color

dollar store vases to house it and a bigger one for the 'family vessel"

Then you'll look into a glass studio near you; the workshop to either blow an ornament or fuse something should be less than 80.00

We are considering either a cocktail unity ceremony or doing a wine toast

@Celia I've been waiting for this response on how to do the glass thing in an affordable way! Thanks! I knew you had an answer on a forum at some point, but could never find it in the search.

@Celia, maybe not exactly 5 minutes. Here's the sample ceremony we looked at, with a couple of questions included.

1.) Ceremony Procession: We do not want to have ushers. Are they necessary? We want our family and guests to sit wherever they want, and will put a sign that the first several rows are reserved for immediate family.

2.) Officiant greeting/opening:

We are gathered here today to celebrate one of life’s greatest moments, and to cherish the words which shall unite _____ and _____ in marriage.

Marriage is the promise between two people who love each other, and who trust in that love, who honor one another as individuals, and who wish to spend the rest of their lives together.

This ceremony will not create a relationship that does not already exist between you. It is a symbol of how far you have come in the past six years. It is a symbol of the promises you will make to each other to continue growing stronger as individuals and as partners, no matter what challenges or successes you encounter together in the years before you.

Today, your lives, which began on separate paths, will be joined as one.

3.) Love/Wine Box (alternative to unity candle)

Officiant says: “At this time I’d like to draw your attention to the box beside _____ and _____. They have written letters to each other expressing their feelings as they begin their marriage. They have detailed why they fell in love and what they truly admire about the other person.

These letters were sealed before they could be read. We will include these letters in the box along with a bottle of wine and two wine glasses. Together we will seal the box, and on the happy occasion of their anniversary, they will open the box, and read the letters.

By reading these love letters, you will be given an opportunity to reflect upon the reasons that you fell in love with each other.

________ & ________ will you please bring up the letters? (Thinking of having MOH hold the letters)

Love letter carriers hand letters to bride and groom

_______ and ________, I now ask you to place the letters in the box and seal it shut.

4.) Reading/Poem

Officiant Says: The Bride and Groom have asked ________ to share a poem by Robert Fulghum called Union.

POEM:

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks – all those conversations that began with, “When we’re married”, and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” – all those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” – and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed – well, I meant it all, every word.” Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

For after today you shall say to the world –

This is my husband. This is my wife.

6.) Vows

Officiant:_____, do you take ______ to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish your union and love her more each day than you did the day before? Will you trust and respect her, laugh and cry with her, love her faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles you may face together. Will you give your hand, your heart, and your love, from this day forward for as long as you both shall live?

Groom: I do!

Officiant:________, do you take ______ to be your husband, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish your union and love him more each day than you did the day before? Will you trust and respect him, laugh and cry with him, love him faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles you may face together. Will you give your hand, your heart, and your love, from this day forward for as long as you both shall live?

Bride: I do!

Officiant: May I have the rings, please? (Best Man gives rings to Officiant) ______, Please place this ring on her finger and repeat after me: ______, I give you this ring, as a daily reminder of my love for you.

Groom: _______, I give you this ring, as a daily reminder of my love for you. (slips ring on)

Officiant:______, please place the ring on ______ finger and repeat after me: ______, I give you this ring, as a daily reminder of my love for you.

Bride: FH, I give you this ring, as a daily reminder of my love for you. (slips ring on)

Officiant: You have made your marriage vows to one another, witnessed by your friends and family. You have sealed your vows with the giving and receiving of these rings. So now, by the power vested in me, I pronounce you husband and wife and invite you to kiss one another.

Big smooch!

Officiant: Please put your hands together to congratulate the newlyweds! ________ & _________ last name!!

Don't kill me, I found this on wedding bee. I am open to any suggestions, Celia!

There is no acknowledgement/thanks to the guest, no moment of remembrance, no personalization, nothing about either one of you, either individually or as a couple.

Forgive me, but it's kinda generic. Do you have an officiant?

We are doing a unity cross

Strand of 3 cords!

MrsVoegs that sounds like the breakup box my aunt gave my cousin during her ceremony. They are to break it open when they are ready for divorce and add to it everytime something great happens for them individually or together.