Unenthusiastic Parents and Future Fam...

If she planned it, it would incredibly trashy or cheap AND my aunts wouldn't show. (I know it sounds really bad to say that but that's another matter entirely). Should I talk to my future mother in law? What kind of role does she have in the wedding bridal shower? Is anyone else having this problem of an unenthusiastic family when it comes to wedding planning? I just want someone to actually help me plan and give good advice from someone in my family. But I guess that's why I got the WW forums? What are your thoughts?

So sorry to hear that Audra! I can totally relate to unenthusiastic future family members ... it is totally frustrating. Fortunately my mom was very supportive, which helped a lot but I am so sorry that you don't have anyone that seems to be pumped for you! Ok, for a bit of perspective, even with those in my life that were enthusiastic, the shower and bachelorette party really didn't start to be discussed or put together until about 6 months out. I am in the same boat you are in that I like to have things planned out WAY ahead of time, but it is REALLY difficult to get others on the same page (I was engaged for 2 years and for the first year most vendors wouldn't even talk to me about my wedding, much less unenthusiastic family members).

Now for the guest list, if you are talking about the wedding guest list, then absolutely, this should be getting done ASAP. As for a shower guest list .. it can wait, it'll be ok, I promise!

Oops! didn't see your other questions ...

FMIL can help with the shower planning if you want her to. I have heard many weddings where 2 showers are thrown - 1 by either the MOB or wedding party members and 1 by the FMIL for that side of the family/guests. My MIL lives out of town and so do most of the guests she invited so I had a family shower (for those in town, hosted by my mom) and a friends/coworkers shower hosted by my BMs

Thats azsunshine I just wanted to whine for a moment. I'm really not trying to be bridezilla I promise lol

My aunts never married, my one aunt was engaged but never actually went through with it. So I guess I figured they'd be crazy about this wedding BUT no. lol

When I get married I will have been engaged for two years. We kept having to put it off due to financial restraints. We're paying for EVERYTHING! Ugh, its so frustrating I know a lot of WW brides are too so you can relate sometimes I wanna rip my hair out lol that would be a good look for the wedding no?

I'm sorry they aren't more excited- but the wedding is a year away. I'm sure the bridal showers are hte farthest things from their minds. Heck, I'm throwing one this summer and I haven't even thought about the guest list. It's 4 months away. I'll get the guest list 2 months ahead of time...

And no one will be nearly as excited about your wedding as you are... I know it sounds harsh- but it's the truth.

But I know how you feel- no one in my family has shown any interest in the wedding whatsoever. FH's family has only expressed they'd like us to wait about 5 years, and go the JP... we're spending too much money.

Meghan took all the words out of my mouth. So. What she said.

I think your friends should be the ones throwing you a shower... have you discussed it with them? Usually they are very enthusiastic about stuff like that. My mom and FMIL are not enthusiastic about the wedding stuff (although very supportive of us getting married) and wouldn't know the first thing about throwing a shower.

And to support what Meghan has said... we're a little over 6 months away from our wedding and I just now got a call from a friend who is throwing me a shower, to try and get plans nailed down. Give it time

Haha we all need to vent sometimes! It is always interesting to see how everyone reacts. My MIL didn't seem to give a sh*t about anything (like almost waiting it out to see if it was actually going to happen or something!) until like 3 months out I think it finally hit her. You unenthusiastic people may come around .. it just may take longer than you'd like. Weddings are so expensive ... I totally understand, its insane. I had a freakout moment when the RSVPs were do and nobody cared enough to RSVP from his side and I just felt like "Why are we paying all this money for people who don't even care?!" but then the day of arrived and everyone was really excited and everything was great, so it'll get there .... just not at the pace we would like

There is a small age difference between my FH and myself. He's 26 and I'm 21. His friends are buying houses, getting married, and having children. My friends are still in college so they are more concerned about going to bars and making a penis cake for my bachelorette party then putting together a family oriented shin dig lol. My MOH is ecstatic and texts me every day.

But yeah, I agree that i should be more worried 2-3 months prior to the wedding. Thanks guys! lol

My FH is 9 years older than me so I know what you mean, although my friends are older than yours. But mine are at the point where they're trying to figure out their careers and ALL live in different cities/countries. You'll get it figured out We're doing a couples wedding shower that is mexican fiesta themed. It will have a fajita bar and mixed drinks so it will be very fun and laid back, not up tight or prim and proper. Maybe you should try doing something more casual like that?

Hmm.. I've been contemplating a belated engagement party that would just be a family & friends cookout...

It is still a year off and usually bridal showers and bach parties aren't until a few months before. I imagine they'll become more enthused and ready to make up guest lists for the events as the time gets closer. I know for myself, FH and our families we were excited, but we didn't really have any of that figured out...and we still don't 5 months away. It has come up in conversation between myself, BM's, and the mom's lol, but otherwise we're still focused on wedding details...I'm saving the party stuff for a later time.

Take a breath, you're probably just experiencing some early wedding stress I'm sure everyone's totally happy for you guys, but as I said, it's still a ways out right now anything that needs to get done is between you and FH and if you have a third party person helping to pay some the expenses.

There's always the engagement party option

I feel the same way, my family couldn't care less. Also ditto about the mom thing, I unfortuately let my mother plan my baby shower (HUGE mistake!) and it was in a bar with everyone drinking and smoking (illegally btw) around me. Good luck hun, hope everything works out well for you