Uncle will officiate wedding :)

I think your desire to have your uncle officiate is wonderful! I'd take imperfections and a good laugh or two at the "alter" over strict word-for-word officiating any day. / I'm no pro at wedding planning or traditions, etc, but I'm a therapist and know a thing or two about anxiety and the need to keep it within tolerable levels. What works for some may cause chaos for others. Do what will work best for you and your FH. I also believe that your wedding ceremony is just that: YOUR wedding ceremony. Going by way of the chaplain first for legality isn't a horrible idea. Perhaps it's an added step that may cause angst to some, but if it helps you and your FH with the anxiety you experience, then go for it. My FH and I considered eloping in Paris, which, due to residency requirements would not be an "official/legally binding" ceremony. What we would have had to do was marry somewhere (i.e. in the States) then have a symbolic ceremony in Paris. I see your proposal to marry on base then follow with a ceremony (uncle officiated) as being similar to that path. Again, some people might think it's unnecessary to due two ceremonies, but this is your wedding: do what you (and your FH) want. I say go for it! / Concerning gifts, I'd say treating him to a dinner (via giftcard) would be great, along with a hand-written personal letter of thanks/appreciation. Best wishes to you, love.

Some people feel honored to officiate. My mom is officiating ours and is beyond honored and excited. She was highly offended when we wanted to hire someone else.

Thanks for all the feedback...especially the positive and constructive kind

Y'all are awesome!

I think it's a great idea! We are doing the same. No issues with legality in Colorado though, so I can't comment on that. However, it's a short amount of time and if someone loves you, they won't feel burdened by this, not to mention it's much more personal. Either say the officiating is their gift and to not get you anything additional or get him a nice thank you gift. Someone above said a nice bottle of whiskey, which I think is perfect.

It's ok and very personal to have a family member be I your wedding. It's YOUR WEDDING.

@Alexis A - you might find more info/support from Offbeatbrides.com on this topic. WW is mostly anti-frendor (there is some good reasoning behind this), but having someone officiate who is close to you sounds like a wonderful idea. Check out the other site to see how other brides have done this.

This sounds like a wonderful idea! My FH's dad is actually officiating our wedding. He is the deacon at our church and while he has never done a wedding, we are all very excited for how special it will be. If your uncle is excited about it, you should be too. It isn't work if he wants to do it and I am sure he is very honored for being asked. I would just get him a small gift and a nice letter which expresses how special it was to have him officiate. Also make sure he understands this is his gift to you, although I am not sure how to do that... I am trying to figure out how to phrase that for friends who are helping us.

Miss S, I've noticed that anti-frendor/family helping thoughts on here...and I've been on for less than 3 days haha

Ah yes....."It's your wedding!!! Do whatever you want!"

Famous last words.

My uncle is doing mine as well!

My FBIL is officiating. He's 100% qualified and has done plenty of weddings. But he's very specific and only does them for family and close friends. So in my case, it's perfectly fine to have him officiate and I think it'll be really special and I'll feel a lot more comfortable with him marrying us.

Just make sure he's 100% qualified and you should be good!

Go for it girl, it's your day my grandma was an officiant for her daughter the wedding ceremony was beautiful .

Ugh dont listen to the negative people. This is just what they always do! You mention a friendor and they freak out. You are the only one here that knows how your uncle is. You know if he will do a good job or not. once you decide that you just have to do the legal work. Ignore the friendor haters on here. They dont know everything. Ultimately, it is your wedding, using a friendor is risky, but you should do what you think is best for your wedding, and whatever happens, good or bad, is on you. as for your actual question, get him something special that is personal to him. Like someone said, treat it like its his birthday. look up groomsmen gifts on pinterest for some inspiration. i also like what someone else said about paying for his lodging if he is staying in a hotel! thats a good place to start with compensation!