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Expert October 2015

Uncle walking me down the aisle

Caitlin, on April 10, 2014 at 1:05 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 2

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So I have a weird situation. My father and I have a weird relationship. We have never been close and have had a lot of issues over the years (I even took him to Court when I was 16 so I could move out.) I don't want him to walk me down the aisle, I want one of my unlce's whom I've always been close to instead. How do I handle this though? My father and I have been slightly better lately (he's helping me buy a car and I still go over on Christmas with my brothers) but it is my day and I want to do it in a way that will make me happy. We are not doing either of the parent dances at the reception because FH and his mother really don't want to. Is there a way to tell my father that I don't want him to walk me down the aisle?

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Latest activity by Barbara, on April 10, 2014 at 1:26 PM

VIP February 2015
Tracy · on April 10, 2014 at 1:23 PM
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What about having your uncle AND your dad walk you down the aisle? My sister had my dad and grandfather and it was really cute.
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Master September 2014
Barbara · on April 10, 2014 at 1:26 PM
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Generally, I think its better if you don't want your father to walk you (but he's still in your life/going to be at the wedding), to just walk on your own. Is this an option?

Anyway, when you tell him, you should really focus on making the decision b/c you WANT your uncle to do it-- not b/c you don't want your dad to do it. "Dad, I really appreciate all you have done for me growing up. Uncle Tom played a big role in raising me, too, and I am planning to ask him to walk me down the aisle." etc. If there is a way you could include your dad in another way, even if its little-- like being part of a receiving line, doing a reading, lighting a unity candle, etc, then that will help soften the blow (in case he is upset by your decision).
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