Too many kids...

I recommend talking your FH out of it. Most of those people with kids will be leaving your reception before 8:30.

I agree with pushingbuttons. I'm all for having children attend (I'm having children attend as well) but 8:30 just seems a little late to have children at a reception. Specially since they might be getting antsy and tired after sitting through a ceremony and not eating until then. ETA: spelling

With the reception being so late things will get stressful for the kid's parents really fast, especially since they are all very young. If you want the kids I definitely recommend a kids table with activities, like the Bride and Groom coloring book and puzzles, ect. Ect.

The kids will need to be fed before 8:30. If I was going to bring my kids (I wouldn't) at a young age I'd bring a meal for them with me and feed them at 6. We would leave the reception max. at 9-10 pm for bedtime. This would be in the age group 0-6. Older kids would still have to eat earlier but probably could be up later. Just trying to paint a realistic picture. There's nothing wrong with your plans, just have practical expectations.

My nephew is 10 and had a great time at our wedding, but it was earlier in the day. He's usually asleep by 9. If I had small children I'd hire a babysitter if I really wanted to go to a Friday night wedding, not bring them with me. I understand your FH wanting to include them, but that doesn't mean their parents will bring them. I'd wait to see how many RSVPs you get that include the kids before you decide to do anything special for them.

Agree with pp, it's not the venue it's the time of day that's concerning if you have kids in the not-teen age range. What time is the ceremony?

Agree with above... that's a late dinner for younger kids, and by that time they'll be cranky, besides hungry.

Gosh my list of 50 guests includes 10 kids under 8 years old...

I agree that is late for a child to eat dinner. However for those that do attend and stay I would set up a table with crayons and coloring books and other activities

We have children participation in the wedding ceremony. They are being announced into the reception and eating with us. After dinner, they are being picked up. Best of both worlds.??

I have 8 or 9 kids but my sister is having a babysitter picking her kids up and I believe my brother is doing the same. The eldest niece and nephew can stay up super late according to their mom.

We have a bunch of kids coming to our 7-11pm reception, but with planned naps during the day.

We had 26 kids come to our wedding and most stayed until 930 or 10pm. It's definitely not your venue's job to dictate who should come. I've been to weddings with my kids and they can last until late because the environment is fun. We had goodie bags with goldfish, cheese and crackers, bubbles, a juice box, crayons and glow in the dark jewelry stapled to coloring books to keep the kids occupied until they wanted to dance on the dancefloor. Everyone was great and the parents really appreciated the goodie bags. If he wants the kids there, I would let him because this night means something to him to have them included.

Talk him out of it. You're not running daycare; you're attempting to have an adult celebration at night.

This has already become a stress point for you, and trust me....it will continue to be an issue from now until then.

When FH and I are invited to an evening wedding even if children are invited we always find a sitter. We are able to have fun and enjoy a night out wit out a cranky 5 year old. I don't think its fair that the couple have to foot the bill for child care at weddings honestly. I'd try to talk him out of it, list the pros for him. It would cut down on cost, no little kids running around and parents would be able to stay later.

Kids were DH's only non-negotiable request for the entire wedding as well, much to my disappointment. I probably could have talked him out of it eventually, but I knew very well the issues it would cause on his side of the family and it wasn't a battle I wanted to start...so we invited kids. I noticed your date is still pretty far out, so at this point that number is just the kids you are inviting, correct? It's likely (hopefully?) that many of the parents will see the time and either decline or get a sitter, so you may not actually have that many in attendance. We invited I think around 20 (195 total guests in attendance) and I don't think that many were there. Much to my surprise, I didn't even notice. However, I absolutely did NOT plan anything for them to do. There was no way I was going to spend my time or money planning things to keep children entertained at our wedding. That's the parent's job, not mine! No one cried, no one made a scene, all were well-behaved...at least enough for me not to notice.

Good luck with that daycare nightmare @Kristina. Sorry.

OP, yes I do think that is too many kids under 12. My suggestion like Celia says is to talk him out of it.

Why is it so important to him?

We are having NO kids. I think that 17 kids is a lot especially with your reception being a little late. I do like the idea of putting them in like a kids zone with coloring books and games. The only thing that worries me is that they are going to get tired and restless really fast, and this will cause your guest to leave early as well.

Depending on the relationship, I would imagine people will either decline or find a sitter if they have young children for such a late wedding. Older kids can usually stay up later just fine. No need to overthink it.

Maybe it's just me, but 8:30 seems very late for dinner in general, not just for kids.

I would definitely set up some kids activities and snacks for them. If you keep them occupied they will be just fine. Maybe some board games ?

Our ratio is 200 guest 25 are children under 12. Our dinner will be at 6:30 though and I am making a goodie bag with coloring book and a couple snacks.

wow 8:30 dinner, I would be cranky...

I helped out at a parenting seminar watching preschool age children. The seminar started at 7pm and by 8:00 most of the kids where super cranky and a few of them had even fallen asleep. By 9:00 most were asleep (they were watching a movie). When children cant sleep and they are tired they become cranky and restless. Even older kids dont understand how the stimulation of a party when they are tired can affect there mood and judgement.

I would let parents of small children know that dinner will be that late and encourage them to find a sitter for after the ceremony. Most parents know there children well enough to know if they can handle that late.