To elope, or not elope? Kind advice please

I want to elope sooo bad. My mother sounds like your mom in a way. My fh wants his family there so we are having a small wedding. My fh and i are paying for everything. We booked the church back in march but our families think we do not have a date. We even have the venue. We picked a venue that only fits a total of 50 people and nothing else. I don't want to tell my family the date but im gonna have to. I'm really scare to do it. I know my mom will try to make me mad somehow. But the venue comes with everything so she can't even plan or do nothing...well that's the hope. If i could elope, i would. But good luck.

If you and his family have the means you could do something of a "destination wedding". Since you haven't paid for the venue perhaps you could find another venue that is just a couple hours or so away for a small intimate wedding. I know that's a lot to pull off in a relatively short amount of time. But at least that way you could have the special wedding that you want somewhere else and keep your family separate. This way you could also keep the photographer and date, maybe just pay a travel fee for the photographer. It would be kind of a middle ground between eloping and full on having the wedding.

I agree with Lex!! Keep the dress and ditch the family! they don't deserve to share your joy on your big day!!! have those that love you unconditionally there to celebrate you and your FH and thats it! don't give anyone else any details and make sure that those who are invited do not give out details to those not on a list.

my FH has a similar issue with his family. mother in particular. but i told him he can't punish everyone for their issues. so he told them she isn't invited and let them decide if they still wanted to come. majority said no and some said yes. those that want to be there for you will be. Best of luck dear!

Will you or your FH regret not have a "typical" wedding?

If the answer in no, elope! You could go on a vacation with his family, then "decide on a whim" to elope." You can tell everyone you just couldn't wait any longer. That way you spare your families feelings of being left out.

If the answer is yes, plan the traditional wedding you want, but don't include your family in the planning. Let them get all the information with the rest of the guest. If they comment, say sorry its too late to change.

It will be wonderful no matter what you do!

You dress is beautiful! I say elope!!! Wear the dress you've already bought. And if you go somewhere kind of local, or within a few hours, your photographer will most likely travel and take your photos at your elopement. If not, still hire them to take photos after you're married. You can have a celebration afterwards. You can certainly get married in the immediate future then have the party in a few months, like you initially planned, but not have a ceremony. Eloping will take the pressure off you and your FH. And by having the party, you can still have the people you care about there to celebrate with you. You can even have a ceremony and make it informal, more of a vow renewal type of thing, for those that really care about you to witness. I would tell people you're married just so they don't feel like you lied to them. But for real, do what works best for you and your FH and don't worry what anyone else says or thinks. You shouldn't be this unhappy or displeased planning your wedding. It's supposed to be a happy time! Don't let anyone take your joy away surrounding the start of your marriage.

What does your fiance want? This is his wedding too so what he wants should be taken into consideration.

I'm so sorry. I really hope all of this works out for you! just remember its about you and your FH. you deserve and beautiful day full of peace and love. don't let anyone stand in the way of that!

You're beautiful!

I was recommend a private elopement. Just the two of you in the church you booked, in that gorgeous dress, with your photographer capturing all the wonderful moments. Without having to worry about the cost of entertaining a crowd, you can splurge on anything and everything else (decorations/flowers....have a stylized wedding photoshoot, maybe)... have the BEST elopement ever!

This is my dream! Part of me wants to have a big wedding, but I'd rather just do it alone, with my guy and have some awesome pictures around the world with him in celebration of our marriage. Then maybe, at some point, have a reception/party with those you want around you.