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Futurewifey
Dedicated July 2020

To all the brides who got married during the pandemic!

Futurewifey, on April 25, 2020 at 2:02 PM Posted in Planning 4 42
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If you got married during this pandemic I want to say Congratulations!!! Hope you have a beautiful and successful marriage! Now I would like to ask you a couple of things.
My wedding is July 3rd and even though we don't know what might happen and if we will be able to have the wedding the way we planned to we're still going to get married that day! So I would like to ask you where did you get married? Backyard, inside, friends/family house or your own? Do you regret not waiting till all this passes? Did you wear your wedding dress or not? Are you having something later like your reception in the future? Idk I would just love to know the details, for you to share how special was your day, to hear any advice, to know a couple of ideas on how to include friends and family and to just be inspired and excited about my wedding day despite the circumstances! Sorry for the long post 馃槄 and thank you!!

42 Comments

Latest activity by Courtney, on April 27, 2020 at 10:31 AM
  • Betty
    Dedicated August 2020
    Betty
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    My wedding is supposed to happen May 30th, in New Hampshire. I am not completely sure it is going to at this point. For that reason we eloped on April 14th, it was our 8th anniversary. We met our JP at a park in Keene, NH and had her marry us. We wore jeans and t-shirt and ate five guys after. Our wedding is paid for and I am really hoping that we can do it on the 30th, but I know that is unrealistic. So we will pick a date and hope that we don't have to postpone it again.

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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    Sounds so cute and something that despite the circumstances was special and sweet! Congrats 馃帄
    I hope you get to have the wedding you planned and it would be amazing if it happens the 30th but if it doesn't I hope you find a date that works out after all this
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney
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    My wedding is July 19 and I too would like to know the answer to some of the questions you asked! We want to get married on our original date and I'm curious as to how everyone pulled it off (: for the most part, seems like the weddings I've seen on here, they look happy!
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    Yeah they look so beautiful! I'm totally ok with getting married on my backyard I think my main concern is if I'll regret not having the 100 guests present and the nice reception. How things are going We want to get married on our date but we don't know when it'll be possible to have the reception if we can't have this year so I want to maybe get some insight on what do you feel after you finally say I do on an intimate wedding 馃槀 Maybe it's dumb but I'm just looking for some positivity and not for someone that tells me to postpone or cancel because I'm tired of all the posts about a new date that just make me sad 馃槅
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney
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    Same here! I haven't wanted to hear any type of negativity or doubt surrounded by just postponing and cancellations. There's people that are cancelling towards the end of the year and I refuse to postpone to next year. How do we know it won't revisit? At least the summer time is hot and the virus should have at least died down. At this point I'm just look forward to marrying my FH. Even if it's intimate we can still try to make it a nice ceremony and reception. How many of your guests do you think would show up?
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    That's the goal!!! Postponing doesn't assure us anything so might as well deal with it and enjoy our day!! I had 140 guests I cut it down to 100 but I'm expecting around 75 bc some of them are elderly and out of state. If I had to keep it small around 50 and in that case probably all of them would show up! Main concern is the venue canceling and having to plan a backyard wedding last minute but we're still willing to do it. How bout you? How many guests you expecting and what's the plan B?
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney
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    Exactly! I think people will be hesitant to attend gatherings for months but how unlikely is someone going to hide in their house until the end of the year? Going to work or school will be no different in my opinion. But our guest count is 97 , we thought about cutting into to immediate and extended family but honestly speaking , seems like I have friends mroe excited to attend than extended family so I'd feel bad for cutting them while extended family may cancel. We are thinking of just seeing who decides to actually attend and go from there. Our venue hasn't cancelled. They've actually been super helpful and doubt they will cancel. Our back up is August 16 , but leases end the end of July and we'd like to move so we don't want to reschedule so far out. I feel like we'd be making other people happy not ourselves.
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    Definitely understand your situation, I would do the same thing, wouldn't be fair for those supportive and excited friends. I have plan A, B and C now I just have to wait and see which one works out but changing the date is not really an option for us since we move to Pennsylvania right after and we're already paying rent for our new place so we don't want to keep paying without actually living there. Also my venue did tell us everything is still on when all this started which was really nice but they're not offering any dates to postpone yet
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney
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    Which one is the plan B and C? I haven't thought of a plan C but probably should! & That definitely makes sense. It's better to just keep the new date since that's what works best for you two! And maybe ask your venue for a back up date? That's what we did and they were open to that.
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    Plan A would be keeping everything as it is with the 100 guests, plan B is cutting down the list to 50 maybe even 25 if it's necessary and use our backyard and plan C is just 10 guests or less which would obviously be immediate family, stream it through Zoom and have a little parade of all of our guests stopping by and saying hi from their cars just so we can all see each other and share the joy, I'll probably pass them their favors since they're all bought already 馃槀. That option C is there bc all of my guests agreed that they would definitely stop by.


    Other thing we're doing is we're sewing some masks to have available for guests in case they would feel more comfortable with them, maybe add some gloves and have enough hand sanitizer available.
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney
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    That sounds good! We also thought about masks in our wedding colors , and I saw something about people seating their guests a seat a part of something so we're going to do that too. I doubt we'd be able to do a drive by type because mostly everyone is from out of town. How did you communicate with your guests about the drive by thing? Did you just come out and ask everyone if they'd still be comfortable attending? And hows your bridal party taking everything?
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    Those are great ideas!!
    I just sent them a message about how we understand the situation that we're in and all the concerns that come with it but since we still have some time for the wedding we are still going ahead with our original plans of getting married on July 3rd but we might have to do some adjustments. I Mentioned that we have several options and some of them required sticking to immediate family but we had a cool idea to solve that and we wanted their opinion. After explaining that plan C they were really excited bc they thought they would miss it entirely due to the situation but still being able to be a part of it was amazing. I guess that since they saw that we were trying to include them one way or another they're willing to be there.

    When I cut down the guest list from 140 to 100 what I did was ask the guests if they would still be willing to attend if we didn't have a restriction for gatherings and the out of state ones said that it was difficult for them due to travel restrictions and the rest are actually willing to attend. So whenever I have to ask something I always put them first and let them know that I'm asking because I worry about their health and all that is happening, I don't want to seem selfish. And the bridal party... that's another story 馃槀 my fh comes from a big family and his 4 siblings and significant others are part of the bridal party, all the guys are all up for it but my 2 sisters in law are not having it. They canceled all of my showers and wedding related activities without even asking and they ordered their dresses this week bc they were still expecting us to cancel. Apart from them 2 the rest have been amazing specially my sister who has been really supportive and she's only 16 How bout your bridal party?
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  • Amy
    Dedicated August 2020
    Amy
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    We are doing what PP did. Paperwork drill to make it official on May 4th and then because we were under contract with everybody we moved our date out to August 15th. We are hoping the military travel ban lifts by then. On May 4th it will be 100% casual with nothing special about it.
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    Sounds like a great plan! Hope both things go great and congrats, you're so close to being officially and legally married!! Hope you have a beautiful wedding on August 15th
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  • Courtney
    Expert July 2020
    Courtney
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    That's a good idea to ask guests who's planning to attend or not! At first I thought that would be weird asking and not sure how they'd feel but they you worded it to your guests seems like a good idea . I'm just slightly worried that if we even mention a back up as something like Zoom that everyone would rather do that than attend , lol. But my immediate family is down with it. My FH's family seems like they're more worried and hesitant about the wedding which kind of sucks because all of my FH groomsmen are his brothers and their kids are in the wedding. The rest of his family (extended excepr a few) lives in another country so we didn't invite them since they can't travel. Two of my bridesmaids asked if I tell them things In advance which is hard to do because of uncertainty. I don't see how I can do that.


    I do think that I should speak with my FH and start thinking of ways we can be more accommodating to those that do attend.
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    I kinda worry about that too but at the same time the ones that really want to attend will do it!
    Sometimes people don't understand we don't even know what's going to happen, so we can't give them a heads up about everything!

    I would definitely do that and try to think as a guest and not a bride (which is something I've struggled with) to try and find those things that might help you be more accommodating. Like if you want plates on table or have them being handed out by someone wearing gloves, if you want a table with all the masks, hand sanitizer, gloves, lysol wipes. Less people per table, more space between them like you mentioned, if there's still a curfew in your area maybe have it earlier so it doesn't interfere and things like that. We should do things to protect our guests so they can't say we were selfish and unreasonable
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  • Laura
    Super September 2020
    Laura
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    We're doing the opposite - and making the small ceremony the 'it' ceremony. What does that mean? Chapel, flowers, wedding cake, cake topper, tuxes, the actual wedding dress - all of that for our micro-wedding. I need our date to be the most important thing because of my sons. Fortunately, we only have 1k in deposits at the 'big wedding venue' because we rescheduled before the large deposits were due. Also, everyone (even the two of us) have to travel for the big wedding - and we don't think people will be ready to board airplanes by August. So, I'd rather do a party with family later - the benefit is that I don't have to wonder about Covid anymore. I'm at 10 people for the micro-wedding.

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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    LOVE IT! I want July 3rd to be our day so I definitely want that to be the main event because if later on we can't have a reception and big wedding because of money issues then I had my beautiful day already and enjoyed it! I do understand why brides choose to do otherwise. In the end I'm just ready to be married, wear my dress, have our first dance and get our pictures professionally taken! When is your wedding ?
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  • Laura
    Super September 2020
    Laura
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    September!!!
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  • Futurewifey
    Dedicated July 2020
    Futurewifey
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    That's awesome, hope everything works out just the way you want it!
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