Tipping - Tip who!?!? Help!!!

You're not tipping your venue, you're tipping the wait staff. The service fee is not a tip and the wait staff isn't going to benefit anything from it.

DOC and assistants- set amount per person based on package cost

Caterers- 15%

Hair stylist- 20%

MUA- 20%

Photographer- set amount per person based on package cost

Videographer- set amount per person based on package cost

Bartender- set amount

DJ- 15%

Bakery delivery/setup- 15%

We tipped the HMUA 20% on total of all services.

We tipped the photographer & his second shooter a total of $200 on a $2700 package; left it up to him to split with the second.

We tipped DJ $100 on his $1300 package.

Based on input we asked for from the venue coordinator (which had a 22% service charge that was not a tip), we tipped: each bartender $100 and each valet $50 (no "tip jars" for either); $100 to the bridal attendant (who was basically at daughter's side for about 10 hours making sure she never wanted for anything); $400 for the wait staff/banquet captain/ etc. (the venue coordinator suggested we give the total amount to her to distribute, because according to her, "some of the staff worked much harder than others" and she'd be sure those who deserved it were taken care of proportionately. The venue coordinator NEVER suggested anything for herself, but she was PERFECT and a huge part of why daughter selected the venue in the first place, so we included a $200 tip for her to split as she saw fit with her assistant. In total about $1000 to people associated with the venue; our total cost for the venue (including food/beverage/furnishings/valets/etc.) was just about $20,000, so about 5% more for tips.

Cake delivery $25.

Floral delivery $50.

I'm sure I'm forgetting some others, but roughly $1500 in tips on a wedding that cost about $30,000 (not including the rehearsal/welcome dinner, that was probably another $300 in tips). It does add up quickly, but it's kind of like eating in a restaurant, you need to figure in the tip as part of the overall cost. We live in suburban So Cal, but I'm sure there are regional/market variations.

We have two photographers and two videographers, so I will tip them each a certain amount.

Service fee is NOT a tip. That is what pays the staff who work on your wedding.