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BrideTawny
Devoted September 2016

Tip Jar at the bar

BrideTawny, on February 5, 2016 at 12:43 PM

Posted in Etiquette and Advice 32

I'm researching bartenders for our wedding and a lot of the info forms ask if it's okay to have a tip jar. I have no idea! What's the etiquette about tip jars? What do most people do?

I'm researching bartenders for our wedding and a lot of the info forms ask if it's okay to have a tip jar. I have no idea! What's the etiquette about tip jars? What do most people do?

32 Comments

  • Missys984
    Master October 2015
    Missys984 ·
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    It depends on your venue and guest. Our venue gave us 2 options. They said we can tip 15% and not have a tip jar or we tip 10% and they have a tip jar. They were honest and like Celia said told us that our guests WILL tip no matter if there is a jar or not. So we chose the 10% and allow a jar. Our only request was that it didn't say "tip jar" on it and be displayed right in the front. They actually just left out a small silver weird shaped bowl that our guests didn't even notice. People just threw a tip on the bar and they moved it after. The next day our venue said people were very generous because it was an open bar which is usually the case apparently.

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  • KW
    Devoted June 2016
    KW ·
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    I also have a question along the same lines. We will be paying our bartender $60.00 an hour... it will be an open bar in the sense that I will pay the tab at the end of the night. What is the recommended tip percentage, or is there a flat rate I should tip?

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  • MauiWowie
    VIP April 2016
    MauiWowie ·
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    If your bartender is paid $60/hour, he's a salaried employee. Any tip is nice, since it's not necessary in this instance. You can do a set tip - like $50 instead of a percentage.

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  • Emily
    Master May 2014
    Emily ·
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    No, it is not ok for the tip jar to be visible on the bar as the majority of responses have stated. Guests should not be reminded or prompted to open their wallets.

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  • KW
    Devoted June 2016
    KW ·
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    @Zoe- thanks for the info!

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  • KPizzle
    Super May 2016
    KPizzle ·
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    I don't think I've ever been to a wedding were a tip jar WASN'T on the bar. I thought it was customary. I always tipped the bartender a few bucks and moved on. I don't see what the big deal is. We're have gratuity included in our catering bill, but if a tip jar is out, I'm not going to make a stink about it.

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  • Sept2017AKBride
    VIP September 2017
    Sept2017AKBride ·
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    Ewwww no!

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  • Lauren17
    Master July 2017
    Lauren17 ·
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    Every wedding I've been to they've had one out. I'm tipping my bartenders and wait staff at the end of the night. But my family is full of bartender's and good tippers. I'm sure they'll throw them couple bucks during the night as well... Not sure if my venue management allows them to put tip jar out or not. Gratuity is included in our venue price but I'm still tipping them at the end of night.

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  • J
    Savvy July 2016
    Jen ·
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    Wow. I guess a lot of people really hate tip jars.

    I'm from New York and I've seen tip jars at all different kinds of weddings. (Budgets ranging from cheap to high end, only one platinum wedding) At events, people tip if they want to or they don't. But if a bar tender is working quickly or putting on a show, it's nice to have the jar there. Now an actual sign saying "tip jar" is poor taste. But just a big jar or one of those oversized wine glasses, people know what it's for once the 1st dollar goes in. I don't think people feel obligated to tip at an open bar wedding. It's not a club/bar.

    I put myself thru school being a server. If someone is happy, they leave a tip. Why get in the way of that?

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  • Formal Pajamas
    Master November 2023
    Formal Pajamas ·
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    I vote no on the tip jar. I went to a wedding recently where he had a tip jar. Everyone was instantly confused. FH and two friends that were also attending the wedding thought they were essentially paying him via tips. I had to tell them that wasn't the case, I had talked to the bride in passing and she said she was paying and tipping the bartender his normal rate.

    We still tipped him, but the tip jar made everyone confused.

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  • BicycleBuiltForTwo
    Master September 2016
    BicycleBuiltForTwo ·
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    I don't like a tip jar. I am less likely to tip of I see one, because it seems like the bartender is asking for tips, instead of giving great service and being rewarded/thanked for it.

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