Tip Jar at the bar

No. You tip, not the guests.

Id rather just tip them myself in a lump sum at the end of the night than make my guests feel like they need to pull out their wallets for anything.

No. People WILL tip them; I see this at every wedding I go to, but I think the tip jar is tacky.

We are planning on tipping the bartender ourselves, but I have a feeling that our guests will tip him also--like Celia mentioned.

I'd skip the jar.

One was put out at my wedding, I unfortunately did not notice it until later. People will tip without the jar and I really, really hate seeing it in my photos. It makes me cringe every time.

Speaking as a bartender... If you are paying them fee, plus taxes, plus at least 18-20% gratuity then no , no tip jar. If, however, gratuity is not part of your contract see if you can amend that in place tip jar. I've been stiffed on a decent tip a few times during events so its understandable when bartenders think its a simple solution but we often forget to think of it from the hosts side.

Our venue told us not to put out a jar.

My DH and i were alway "NO WAY" with having a tip jar out, then we realized that even with the tip jar not there that we still left the bartender tips at weddings. So last minute we said that he could have it out ;-/ ehhh whatever.

eta: we still left him a tip at the end of the night, just not as big as we would have with out the tip jar out. And the bartender was discrete about it too it wasnt actually on top of the bar so that was better.

my bartender was hired separately from the caterer so there wasn't any gratuity included in the original bill. we still left him 20% though

No. No tip jars on the bar. People can / will tip the bartender if they want to, but they shouldn't be prompted by a jar.

I ran into this same scenario with a bartender I spoke with, when I asked if we could just tip at the end of the night instead of having the jar, they kept hesitating because they said in the past they make more tips from the jar than the couple afterwards. I asked the average amount from the jars and maybe we could match the average jar amount, again hesitant and kept beating around the bush.

So weird. I am not really sure what to do either so I am following!

I noticed one out at my wedding and I immediately went to my catering head person and said I was uncomfortable with it since I was giving them a generous tip. The head told me that guests had asked about it so they put it out. Either way, it was removed about 30 seconds later.

People don't need a jar to tip a bartender if they want to. When was the last time you saw a tip jar when you went to a bar? You tip them at the end, and if your guests FEEL like it they can too, but it shouldnt be out there in their face.

FH & I almost always tip the bartender as guests at a wedding, but it's as an extra thank you and a hope for great personal service for the rest of the night

I vote no to tip jar. Honestly - I wouldn't put the tip in there anyway, I'd hand it directly to the bartender

I totally agree that we should not make our guests open their wallets but what if the venue/bartender themselves puts it out? I've seen that at weddings numerous times.

No tip jar. You tip the bartenders yourselves.

FH is a bartender. I would definitely plan on tipping at least 18% yourself. People tend to tip terribly, if at all, at private events and it REALLY hurts the bartenders. If your guests tip, they just hand it to the bartender and the bartender will take care of it.

People will tip and don't need a jar to remind them. Tell the bartender/catering manager/planner/DOC to put it away.

I intend to tip ourselves.

However, I have literally never been to a wedding where there wasn't a tip jar. Not saying it's right, just speaking of my experiences.

A tip jar should always be kept behind the bar, never on it. Yes, it's OK for it to be visible. If your bartending service claims to be professionals, they should know this too. ETA: I totally intend on having a tip jar! FH and I are long time industry people, and so are a lot of our guests. We tip! Our friends tip! It's going to be a good night for our staff.

Thanks for all the advice!